3-6 months

3-6 months

3-6 months Hey
On thursday my grans consultant informed her she has 3-6 months left befor she is taken from this world.
My gran is my world and i want to cry and scream because this is so unfair, but im not crying for her, im crying for myself because she is leaving me!
Im at university doing adult nursing and my exams start soon, im far away from home and im finding it a struggle to concentrate on anything!
I need to be there for the rest of my family aswel because im the stronger person out of my mother and my grandfarther, the only thing is i will have to come back to uni and then i am not going to have anyone to keep me composed!

Any suggestions!

Hi Sezzy

I just want you to know I am thinking of you at this time, and my heart goes out to you and your family.

My gran passed away just before Christmas from bowel cancer, and I am still finding it really hard to deal with.
My gran unfortunately outlived three of her children (she had seven altogether) who all died due to cancer. Both my aunts had breast cancer, and my uncle had myeloma. My mum has also had breast cancer, and my gran had to see her go through a bilateral mastectomy. When we found out my gran had cancer I just felt it was so unfair, and I was so angry.

I am training to be a radiotherapist, so like you had to deal with the stress of study and placement as well as helping mum look after my gran (she nursed her at home).

My suggestion is to speak to someone at university and let them know what is happening. They will allow you time out, especially as it sounds like you are one of the main carers.

Is your mum and your grandad looking after your gran at home?
If so there are lots of resources that can be accessed.
We had carers coming in twice a day to help wash my gran (my mum doesn’t keep very good health) and get her changed, and the district nurses would come in to help with the medication. The GP came out regularly to see her, and they gave her good pain relief. She also had respite in the hospice.

I do know how you feel, and it is really difficult, but you will get support and advice on this site.

If I can help with anything please let me know

I am sending you big cyber hugs

Helpline Dear sezzy

Breast Cancer Care’s helpline may be able to offer support and advice at what must be a very difficult time for you and your family.
The number for the help line is 0808 800 6000 and is open Monday to Friday 9am - 5pm, Saturdays 9am - 2pm.

Hope you find this of help

Kind regards
Forum Host
Breast Cancer Care

I’m sorry! Oh sweet heart - I am so sorry.

Theres not alot I can say to make you feel better but i can understand how you feel - My grandad died of multiple cancers (they got it so late it was everywhere and didn’t know where it started) just before my A’levels and i was heart broken partly as he was so desperate for me to do well and wouldn’t see how my life panned out but also I wanted him around forever for our ‘put the world to rights debates’.

To help you make snese of it all you need to ensure you don’t let your studies be affected (speak to your uni - see if you can take some time out - your doing a mdeical course so they’ll understand I hope) and just enjoy every moment with you gran and your family remember ‘Shes still here now! so just grab every exciting and memory filled moment with her’.

With your studies you can make a difference to so many peoples lives like you so just remember you gran is and will always be proud of you.

Don’t stop talking to people so you don’t bottle things up - this is a hard time for your emotionally and educationally - Talk to your gran and make sure she knows you love her, what you mean to her and how much you’ll miss her.

I’m not going to say be strong - just do what feels natural and let out what you want be it anger or tears - Its because she is such a special person.

Keep your chin up!!