35 and recently diagnosed

Hi all,

I’ve recently been diagnosed with Symptomatic, Grade II, invasive, ductal cancer ER 2, PR 0, HER2 positive. Lump being about 4-5cm big. Luckily my lymph nodes are currently clear. As the lump is so big my consultant wants to do chemotherapy first to reduce its size then surgery. 
Had my initial oncology appointment on Tuesday, so have now been told my chemo plan. 8 rounds, 1 every 3 weeks. Honestly, knowing I have to go through chemo is making me anxious. I’ve got to wait 2-3 weeks for my first chemo round appointment to come through.
The waiting for me is the hardest part right now because I just want to get the chemo done and out the way. I’m a doer so sitting around waiting is always difficult. 

Everyone keeps saying how amazing it is that I’m being so positive about all of this, but in reality, inside I’m totally freaking out. Luckily my best friend makes me laugh, nicknaming my damn lump Clive and telling me to kick his ass and evict him!  

No idea why I’m writing this, suppose I just needed to get it out there. So feel free to ignore my ramblings :relaxed: but if you did read, thanks for listening XX


Hello @ndavison  and welcome to the club no-one wants to join I’m so sorry to hear of your diagnosis at what is a relatively young age. 
Posting on the forums and reaching out to Breast Cancer Now is exactly what we are here for. I’m so pleased you have a good supportive friend and her friendship and support will be invaluable to you over the coming months, but the support of those of us who know and have been through and are going through treatment will be a great support to you too. Don’t be afraid to say how you are feeling we are all too good at putting on the brave positive face!
Your feelings of “helplessness” at this stage are entirely understandable too, right now you probably feel like there is nothing you can do and want to do “something”. My suggestion would be to try and educate yourself as much as you can: however whatever you do don’t ask Google! I have found the resources on Instagram really helpful for sensible practical advice: Dr Liz O’Riordan is wonderful and she has a really helpful book, as is ticking off breast cancer and they also have a really helpful book. 
Some advice which flies around on the internet can feel very overwhelming but the best advice is the simplest: (try to!) eat healthily (but don’t deprive yourself) carry on exercising as much as you can (I’ve got a friend going through chemo at the moment and she takes every opportunity to play tennis when she can) but listen to your body and rest when you need to, even a 10 minute walk outside is beneficial when you feel like doing nothing else. 
Wishing you all the best with your treatment and feel free to pop back on here and post whenever you feel like it. 
lots of love AM xxx

Hello @ndavison  ,

Im so sorry you are going through a worrying time at the moment.

My daughter was 39 when she was diagnosed two years ago,she too was her + and had 8 rounds of chemo first to shrink her lump followed by surgery.

She was surrounded by so much love and support from family and friends as I’m sure you will be.Although the thought of the treatment plan may seem daunting at times especially in these early days just take one day at a time and go with it.Be kind to yourself too.

My daughter has now completed all her treatment and is happily back at work and getting on with her life.This will be you too.

This forum is so supportive and is here for you every step of the way x

Sorry to hear about your diagnosis but it’s good that you found this forum. It has been so good for me. The support is amazing. My tumour is Carlos (the squatter) and was evicted in April :crossed_fingers: . But I’m going to start chemo soon to make sure he won’t return. All the best xxx