Oh my goodness, give yourself a break. You are a great mum and your response is I think quite normal, you have gone now and got it checked so that’s great, I waited a few months to go get things checked although I was pretty sure, and it kept on growing , I didn’t want to admit it or have the reality check. Telling people is hideous, I still glide over the truth to my family, little white lies about scans etc and I am 2.5 years into the journey and still battling on. Good luck xx
1 Like
You are me:joy:
! I’ve got an mri booked but not giving me a ct scan unless I need it based on the mri just on my boobs. My hormone results came back today. A day after the positive cancer results. Ring your bcn they maybe back already. I’m er pos her neg. I’m pleased. The doctor said today it has probably been there a year, I just said oh gosh that really surprises me:joy:
.
2 Likes
Tbh think we have all been there I was diagnosed October 2022 I only finished all my treatments last year I found my lump tbh few years ago but it didn’t feel like a lump as such it was like a rock took up my whole boob then I had a baby in the October I was diagnosed he was 3 weeks old and I only went doctors because one boob went back down to normal size and my other boob didn’t and my nipple started going in. Xx
2 Likes
Oh my dear lady please call the nurses on here ( they only ask you to share your first name and postcode for their internal records) and no blame ever
If you have a Maggie centre get yourself along to them too, they will listen and not judge
Stop using google it will scare you or give you incorrect advice
Your team at the hospital will listen too
Just open up you’ve done it here so take a big leap and talk to someone
Not easy but sometimes our greatest fears can be helped with a chat and a cuppa and being given personal 121 information and advice
Good luck
3 Likes
Today when they said the cancer has been there a while, I didn’t feel like they were blaming me. I got an idea of treatment today and fingers crossed all being well, it wont be massively different than if I’d gone 9 months ago. This process is like riding a wave. I’m up today after my appt. MRI booked and I feel I have something to work towards. I’m going to keep this too myself and try to stop thinking about. The battle in your body I don’t think is ever as bad as the battle in your head.
9 Likes
You are right there and the places we gobin our imagination are often worse than the reality of it. Glad you’re feeling a bit better and have a better idea of what is going on .
Xx
2 Likes
Oh bless you, you absolutely deserve some sympathy. None of us want to be part of this club and nothing is your fault. It’s not surprising at all that you put things off, prioritising breast feeding and looking after a baby, then feeling that you needed a much needed holiday.
Change your mindset and don’t beat yourself up any more. It’s been found and will be dealt with. Most breast cancers grow quite slowly anyway and the delay probably hasn’t made any difference.
Wishing you well. Best of luck. You’ve got this. x
3 Likes
Sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I’m sure it’s very common to be overoptimistic at first. Our knowledge improves during the experience but initially we can be very unsure of what is going on. When I noticed the lump in November 21 my first thought was “my mother had a lump and it was benign so mine must be benign too” - in other words completely unrealistic! The lump felt mobile about 2-3 cm, not at all painful. But when I showed it to my husband he said “you will have it checked won’t you?”. So I filled a form on my GP surgery’s website thinking that, with COVID still being around, she would not want to see me in person. But she did invite me in straight away, examined me and referred me to the breast clinic. Even in the clinic during the checks I remember thinking “surely it will be benign”. I even remember a moment of silence and disbelief when they told me it was breast cancer. So if I got the diagnosis as early as Jan 22 it’s only down to other people’s wisdom and skills not my own!
1 Like
Hi Kat
Stop right now! Do not feel guilty!
I was diagnosed with stage 3 in December 2020. I found a lump just below my armpit in the March (just before the 1st lockdown). Sometimes it was there, sometimes it was there, sometimes it wasn’t.
In the October, I could feel the lump all the time.
I eventually went to my GP in the 2nd week of November. I had to wait nearly 3 weeks for the referral appointment. I knew that BC was going to confirmed.
Grade info here - nothing you could do.
I had all the treatments: mastectomy, chemo, rads and now I am on Anaztrole and have 1 more Zometa infusion (I am a lot older than you!). Apart from Anaztrole making me ache (a paracetamol helps but I am loathed to ask for a change - better the Devil you know). I do have lymphedema, but then I had 40+ lymphmodes, 36 were infected. But I am fine - back to ‘me’ within a year of the end of hospital treatment and living my life to my full,
But I am kind to myself and if I can’t be bothered to do something, I don’t, and I don’t beat myself up about it. Life’s too short to sweat the small stuff (I never did anyway but do even less now).
Just like I DO NOT beat myself up about not going to my GP earlier. And what’s a little fib to keep Mum happy?
Hope everything goes well for you.
1 Like
Knowing other people do the same thing helps, although I would have avoided hospitals like the plague in Covid too.
how is your lymphodema? I can potentially avoid chemo in I have a complete ln clearance.
1 Like
Hi kat1
I had two lymph nodes involved so opted for clearance, it wasn’t found in the others yet removed, I got an onco score of 11 so I have avoided chemo and now waiting to start radiotherapy. The onco score wasn’t mentioned until after the axillary clearance results.
Hope your doing ok
Sending hugs
Xx
1 Like
That should have said that they removed
Xx
1 Like
How do you feel after the op?
1 Like
Hi
I’ve been fine, I originally had a grade 2 lump with no nodes involved, so had a lumpectomy and snlb last October. It was then discovered to be in two nodes so they removed the rest which like I said were clear. The first operation was fine and I recovered quickly, back driving after about 7 days, the 2nd operation took a bit longer to recover from as they went in the same scar in the armpit from the original op and the arm was a bit more painful, I also developed a small seroma.
I kept up with the exercises as my nurse told me too and it settled down after about 4-6 weeks. I have full movement in my arm and I’m still doing the exercises and stretching my arm up above my head if it starts to feel stiff.
Do you know when & what you will be having done yet?
Xx
2 Likes
No I know it’s er pos, her2 neg. I have to go for an mri to see how many lymph nodes etc. I’m hoping they will book surgery after that.
1 Like
Oh. you poor love! You know, if you did tell the medical team that you found it last March you wouldn’t be the first. There must be hundreds if not thousands of women who have put things off. Don’t beat yourself up, it’s a natural reaction to disbelieve what’s happening and put tests off. You deserve sympathy and empathy and hugs! It’s bad enough being on this journey without feeling you have to pass judgement on yourself. No-one else will judge you so don’t put yourself down. Praying for healing and strength and a positive state of mind. And sending love. xx
2 Likes
My lymphedema is managable. If I overdo carrying, moving heavy furniture etc. it will flare up.
I have a day and night cuff and next week and the weeknafter I have 4 days of ‘pummelling’ to soften my forearm as it can be a bit harder than it should be.
It’s a pain (not painful) but another badge of honour that I’m alive and well.
I’m happy to go about in short sleeves (in the summer!) and only 1 person has ever commented in the 18 months since I have had to wear a cuff. The shop worker at a supermarket till said that she hoped my arm would get better soon.
Thanks for asking. It is a risk but mine was huge due to the number of lymph nodes involved and massive area that rads was needed.
Being deep in the Covid mess wasn’t a factor in not going to my GP. It was just sometimes I could feel the lump and sometimes not.
I hope you get your plan soon - the waiting is the hardest bit.
2 Likes
Hi. Kat1
Try not to beat yourself up , I put off going as I’d had a cyst before and just presumed it was that again . Even when I went to the doctor , he wasn’t concerned and I was pleased he agreed it was likely a cyst .
Weeks later I just couldn’t get it off my mind so went back and asked them to refer me to be sure .
Fast forward diagnosis, lumpectomy radiotherapy, then hormone therapy .
I agree if it’s really concerning you , have a chat to the nurses , they are brilliant .
But no if you’d rather not tell your doctor , you don’t have to .
I wish you well on your journey , everyone here is so lovely and will support you too .
Xx
1 Like
Hi Catnip was wondering how you were doing - nice to hear from you xx
1 Like
Hi JoanneN
Thank you for asking . I’m struggling still after the death of my husband from brain cancer while dealing with my own issues .
Thankfully my prognosis is good and I’ve just had my 1 year mammogram .
And so very grateful to Breast Cancer Now for all the help and support that is here .
It’s gotten me through some dark days I can tell you .
But now perhaps I can support others too .
Xx
4 Likes