Hi, I hope everyone is doing ok, just wanted to post this as I’m feeling a bit low, I am so grateful that I have finished my cancer treatment. I had to have a single mastectomy last November, I have recently been struggling with the fact that I have had the mastectomy and I’m finding this very hard to deal with, I feel vulnerable and struggling with body image. I’m trying to be positive and doing regular exercise but haven’t got much confidence 
4 Likes
Hi @mitch2 I am so sorry that your treatment has left you with this legacy, it must be very hard to adjust to something so fundamental to one’s self image. I have no personal experience of it with which to advise you but wonder if you have considered the Someone Like Me initiative which BC Now offers? I hear that you are lacking in confidence at the moment so appreciate it might seem a hard thing to do but having a one-to-one relationship with someone who knows exactly what you have been through, and continue to go through, could be invaluable in beginning to accept your new normal. You can find out more about it here Someone Like Me: Breast cancer one-to-one support | Breast Cancer Now . There is a phone number on there to talk it through with someone to make sure it’s for you or you can apply immediately. We all need someone to talk to in these circumstances, someone who has been there and gets it. Please give it some consideration. The biggest of big hugs to you.
@mitch2 sorry to hear that you’re struggling 
I had a single mastectomy in March and have struggled on and off since with feelings about it! There is a chat on here; Mastectomy - flat and fabulous or reconstruction. Shared experiences that one of the lovely ladies on our chemo group started - not sure if it helps at all but it did for me just to hear about others and their attitudes to it! It is a life changing operation so don’t give yourself a hard time about having a down day! Always happy for you to message me if you think it would help! Lots of love 
2 Likes
@mitch2 I had a single mastectomy in October. For me I rationalised very quickly that it was so full of cancer that if I wanted to live it had to go & as soon as possible. I have largely isolated at home ever since through chemo & with having no hair the impact on how I feel when I look in the mirror it’s quite likely I still have to adjust to the reality of what’s happened. Exercise is exactly what we need to start to feel better but I’m here anytime you want to chat-don’t deal with this alone x
1 Like
Hello ladies.
Just wanted to remind you ladies that, once you’re finished treatment, you could look for a Moving Forward course near where you live or online. It seems to help a lot of people and it’s a chance to meet others who understand what you have been through. They are very relaxed and friendly. You can book on the BCN website or just phone a helpline and they would help you book.
It all gets easier as you put more distance from treatment, but life never quite feels the same again, that’s for sure
Sending you all love and hugs
2 Likes
@Tigress many thanks for your reply, I have already used the Someone like me service and it was really helpful, I’m feeling slightly better this week, trying keep positive xx
@loupy many thanks for the info on the chat, I will have a look, feeling better this week x
1 Like
@mitch2 glad you’re feeling better xx I think we all have ups and downs and there’s nothing wrong with that! Xx
1 Like
I had a single mastectomy in March last year. Weirdly I never wanted reconstruction and have had horrible side effects from radiation so now it’s no longer an option without a lot of difficulties. I am struggling to accept how I look but I don’t regret having a mastectomy. I am so scared of every lump and bump I wouldn’t have coped with anything I couldn’t feel was right or wrong and I had/have small breasts so after an attempt at lumpectomy and missed margins I had to have a mastectomy anyway. Do I miss my old body? Every second of every day. Would I have made a different decision knowing what I know now…? No. So I am giving myself a lot of time and grace and hoping that one day I won’t think of myself as a scarred and mutilated but rise above all that socially expected norm of beauty and just be glad that I survived. You have got this.
1 Like
I am not coping since my mastectomy at all. I have found it soul destroying along with all the other side effects.
I am 40 next month, and am distraught that my life has gone this way. I also have lymphodema. Have constant uti’s. Skin sliding off my bones. All muscle has turned to fat.
For me, i genuinely am not sure it has been worth it.
I have been thinking of how to reply because I have been where you are and some days I feel exactly like you too. The only advice I can give you when everything feels so difficult and you miss the old you and the life and future you thought you would have…is to take one hour at a time. Try and do small things that are good for you. For example, if I need a good cry, I do that. I love my coffee, so I will go for a walk and get a cuppa. Or I have started with paint by numbers. Because I am so busy trying to find the numbers, I forget my pain and my thoughts for a little space of time.
You are not alone. And lastly, consider getting therapy. I was diagnosed with PTSD last year 4 months after my breast cancer diagnosis. My therapist has been a real gift in my life.
Thinking of you.
2 Likes