In the light of today’s newspaper reports, are people considering giving up alcohol altogether or do you think it’s a bit like closing the stable door after the horse has bolted!! or does it make a difference to the chances of the cancer recurring? I would hate never to be able to have a glass of wine with dinner again or champagne to celebrate but I feel incredibly guilty about the whole thing. Did I bring breast cancer upon myself by drinking too much in my youth (and thereafter!) Anybody got any comments?
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Oh it’s depressing. Things like this make me feel guilty as I have enjoyed a tipple or two and 6 months before being diagnosed was drinking too much as having a rough time of it one way or another. I suppose we’ll never know how much we contributed to our own bc and how much of it has just been pants luck all round.
I have cut down massively - hardly drunk anything at all since being diagnosed and only a couple of glasses of wine on chemo over last 6 months. I have no idea if it increases risk of recurrance. I guess not drinking can’t hurt, but like you said we’ve been through such a lot of crap we deserve a drink every now and again!!
I think you can defo have a glass of wine or champers to celebrate and every now and then when we feel like it. I’m not drinking every day so a blow out every few months with the odd glass here and there shouldn’t be a total disaster. I’ve been stressing a lot over what to eat, drink to try and make sure this never comes back and I don’t have to go through this again… but when it comes down to it we have the disease in our bodies now, it’ll do what it does. We’ve had/are getting the best treatment we can. Being healthy is a good plan but I will try, and you must try, not to beat yourself up over it and make self miserable. Health and happiness…few glasses of wine too!!
xx
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I have never drunk any alcohol(just dont like it) … I still got BC and how I wish I did drink, a nice glass of wine would make the medicine go down… please dont feel guilty you have to think of quality of life obviously no ‘binge’ drinking is a good idea but that is the same for everyone.
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Hi girls
Goodness, I have been down this road and gone round the roundabout a dozen of times. Mentioned before in another post ages ago, I have always watched my weight, eaten healthily, only known my hubby in the “naughty” sense, never taken drugs, yes, enjoy my wine and champers, never smoked, never took the birth pill, etc etc. Had a scare 20 years ago but was nothing, Consultant said then I am very low risk but still ended up getting it. My Onc I have now has said that you can get someone who has done everything above to excess and will never get cancer - there’s no rhyme or reason for it.
What I can say now, if I fancy a cream cake once a week, a glass or two of wine with my dinner then so be it. If I was a “good” girl before then I shall certainly enjoy being a “naughty” girl now. My Onc said if they knew why some people got BC and some people didn’t, it would be a lot easier to find a cure for this horrible disease. Live life to the full while you can. I have just lost my Dad last weekend to cancer and it was just horrendous, he told me to enjoy my life while I have got it, lets face it nobody knows what is around the corner, we could all be sitting here worrying about BC returning (I know I do, its with me every day) but we could get knocked down by a bus tomorrow.
Have and do what you fancy, everything in moderation, we all have to go through so much with treatment and then medication I think we all deserve a little light relief now and then.
Love K
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If you read a book called ‘Foods to Fight Cancer’ in there it says red wine is good for you. The scientist who wrote the book says that surveys never distinguish between different types of alcohol, and therefore the assumption is that other types of alcohol are bad, but red wine is good (my onc told me this too). Something to do with the chemicals present in red grapes. So if you don’t like alcohol drink red grape juice.
As for me - I always preferred white wine, but I’m trying to develop a taste for red!
Please don’t feel guilty or beat yourselves up - it doesn’t help and probably depresses your immune system until you get over it. Obviously it can be useful to learn some lessons from our past lifestyles and behaviours which contributes to how we got to here.
However, what’s important is what you do from now.
I found giving up the odd glass or 2 of wine or beer (and I really was only an occassional and light drinker) was more difficult than becoming vegan! But that period of adjustment passed and was just a part of the acceptance that if I was going to do the best I could for myself, there had to be some radical changes, some harder than others. And let’s face it, most of us have drunk enough already to last a lifetime if we follow the 1 unit of alcohol a day rule for women - we just got in a few of those rounds early in life so no need to feel deprived. It’s amazing how good life feels without it and that you can chill out and enjoy company alcohol free. It just takes a little practice.
Wishing you well,
Jenny
Hi Kelly,
Sorry to hear about your dad. I lost my mum to cancer three weeks before I was diagnosed. My dad too, but several years ago. I think my brother is getting worried as it really seems to be in the family (tho’ my dad was bowel cancer and with my mum they couldn’t find a primary - she was diagnosed with brain mets - but they didn’t think it was breast cancer)
RR
xx
Hi, Kelly. I’m also sad for you to lose your Dad and to cancer. It is possible to have a good time and look after yourself too and I’m sure that’s what he would want for you.RoadRunner - how sad and difficult to cope with your Mum’s death and your own diagnosis in just 3 weeks. I’m sure that family habits and lifestyles can lead to the whole tribe getting the same family of illness. Perhaps this is a good time for you to look at this with your brother. There are definitely factors in common with breast/colon/prostate cancers which may apply to you. The friends I have lost to brain tumours have had brain or breast or lung or colon primaries but I don’t know that history helps. It’s just a matter of doing the best you can with what you’ve got-
Dru I’m not sure which newspaper report you saw. It’s been known for ages that women after recurrence and after menopause or over 50 are at higher risk if they drink. I wonder what else has just been published…
Wishing you well,
Jenny
This has really got me thinking: what about Linda McCartney, I believe she never drunk alcohol, was a vegetarian, exercised, obviously had no money worries or issues, yet she got BC. My Dad was not a drinker either, started with prostate, spread to stomach and lungs. There is also a definite link between fathers with prostate cancer and daughters with breast cancer, even more strange with these two factors blood group is nearly always A+, just like me and my Dad. I am E+ by the way.
My GP did tell me a few weeks ago, only drink 3 times a week, 2 glasses each time. Trying to take his advice but at the moment with the stress a bit hard.
My heart goes out to you all who have lost loved ones. This is the first time I have lost someone so close to me, hurts like hell!!
I aske d my onc about alcohol and he said there is NO firm evidence to link it to breast cancer whatsoever. He said the studies are flawed becuase people who drink often smoke and have a poor diet and this was not factored in. SO ENJOY! He is a top consultant and I am sure if there was a link he would tell me.
Love Alise
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Hi all,
just to add my ten pence worth! My oncologist said exactly the same as Alise’s, so I’m sticking with that until I hear anything convicing otherwise. I am quite a big drinker, always have been. However, I know many women who have never drunk much alcohol, exercised regularly and ate a mega healthy diet yet still developed bc!! So, I’m taking this piece of evidence with a pinch of salt. Next week they’ll be telling us how drinking alcohol reduces the risk of bc!!!
If we listened to everything these so called ‘researchers’ tell us we’d never eat or drink anything!!
So, balls to it, I’m gonna continue to eat, drink and be merry!!! A little bit of what you fancy is my philosophy,
Take care,
Kelly
-x-
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Kelly
Was interested in your comment about fathers & daughters as I never know there was a link. My dad has prostate cancer & I now have BC but whenever I have been asked about cancer in the family & mentioned my dad the doctors seems to just dismiss it - they’re looking for any other BC in the family.
Would be interested if you have any links to literature about this connection.
I used to drink quite a bit in my youth & am a red wine lover now. I like your GPs advice 2 glasses 3 times a week, going to the offy now, clink clink!
LOL
Alison
x
No one knows exactly why we get breast cancer and the dietary advice varies from day to day and is often contradictory. I personally feel we are born with a genetic fault which will manifest itself under certain circumstances but what they are I have no idea. Could be The Pill or treatment for HRT or something interfering with our cell regeneration but I do not attribute it to social drinking which is what I was doing when I was first diagnosed 17 years ago and after a recurrence this April, am still doing and intend to continue doing as I enjoy a couple of glasses of wine in the evening. My oncologist was totally in agreement. This disease is not going to beat me - in fact I am now buying better quality wines than the cheap plonk of the old days but there again I am a grandmother of 68 and reckon I deserve it! Here’s to you all and make it a big one…
Hi all,
I have given up on thinking what causes BC, there are just so many combinations, smoking,drinking, diet, lifestyle, genetics, environmental influences, the list can go on and on.
Once you have got cancer I think it is sensible to try and respect your body more and hope that recurrence’s do not occur.
Myself I have always eaten well, exercised and never smoked. Mt alcohol intake was moderate but now I have just plain gone off it.
Even with all this I have just had my third occurrence of cancer in 18 months and its an aggressive one. That’s another element to the cancer debate, why should mine be aggressive and others slow growing.
We could tie ourselves up in knots. Just enjoy life doing what we do best, cope! None of us know how long we have on this earth, we are lucky, we understand just how precious it is. Some people go out of the door saying ’ Goodbye luv, see you later!’ and they never come back, sudden death strips people of their chance to experience reflections on life.
Chin up all lets not live dying!.
Oh girls
You really have cheered me up, as much as can be expected at the moment, but whenever I feel really upset and down, especially about my Dad, I log on here and join in a conversation and hey presto, I feel a little better. Its so nice hearing everyone’s opinion and different views, its what makes the world go round.
Kelly, you really made me smile, I could just hear my Dad saying exactly the same thing. We’ve all got to go sooner or later, lets make the best of it while we are here. Someone once said to me “what’s the point of getting to the pearly white gates with a perfect body - it just shows you haven’t lived”. Don’t know why but always remembered it. Still can’t pluck up the courage though to do The Hulk rollercoaster in (Islands of Adventure) Universal Studios, Florida!!!
Mammabee, I first heard about the link between prostate/BC when Kylie Minouge’s doctors were giving an interview. At my BC clinic they were also talking about this connection too. A few weeks ago on this site there were quite a lot of postings about the same thing, it was amazing to find how many girls had BC, were A+ blood group and their Dads also had prostate cancer and A+ blood. BC and prostate C can both be treated by Zoladex injections, as apparently they are both hormonal type cancers.
On the wine front, my father-in-law was told to drink red wine with his dinner every night after his heart attack. As there is a ? re arimidex and cholesterol and heart disease, it just seems we take one thing to protect us from problems, which in turn causes another problem. Can’t win whatever we do.
So ladies, whatever you enjoy doing, go for it. The one thing I do enjoy which I will never give up is chicken curry, chinese chips and to share a bottle of bubbly with hubby on a Friday night. If you enjoy it and you have a nice time, it can only do you good 
Love you all
K
I guess any doc. who advised patients with BC to drink hadn’t seen the news published to-day. I’ve seen the article and the evidence seems pretty clear: the more booze the more risk. Also I find that drinkers and smokers are really not very good at advising on the health benefits of doing neither.
There’s evidence that breast and prostate and colon cancer and heart disease share the same triggers which set them off. It probably takes many years, starting in adolescence to build up, jumping out at us anything from a few years to decades later.
Whatever you think the contributory causes may be, it’s not how you got here but where you go on your next step which may influence your wellbeing, like any other devilish things in life - like relationship breakdowns, debt, getting the sack, bereavement. All the past is unavoidable how ever many times you rerun it in your head. Let’s just do our best for ourselves and our nearest and dearest now for how we all are and for a brighter future.
Wishing you well,
Jenny
Hi Jenny
I really agree with your last sentence, hit home a little bit, but how can we do the best for ourselves and our family if we are not really sure what the best is. (By the way, agreeing with you here, not arguing, I tend to put both my feet in things without meaning to!) All the advice we are given by the medics, nurses, clinics is all so contradictory. Its good to talk on here as everyone has different views so we can all get a good idea of whats around and other opinions etc. I may have sounded like an alcoholic, definitely not, but do enjoy a glass or two of red wine. Its hard to completely feel at peace within oneself about anything to do with BC as unfortunately there are no guarantees with whatever we do. I think we just have to get as much info as possible, make a calculated decision, stick by it and live to the best we can. Hope I haven’t upset or offended you.
Love K
Certainly there has been evidence for some time that drinking too much increases risk of breast cancer…quite different from saying that drinking causes breast cancer. Personally I think my own heavyish drinking from age 18-early 40s may have contributed to the unique series of events which ‘caused’ my cancer…Just as, or more important in my case were my age, having no children and not breastfeeding. (Which isn’t to say if you got breats cancer after breastfeeding that not breastfeeding isn’t an increased risk factor…it is.) But I don’t beat myself up for not having children or for the drinking though in reflecting on my life I maybe regret some of my alcohol influenced behaviour…but hey some of it was fun. I also wish I’d never smoked, but you can’t turn the clock back.
I don’t think there’s evidence that not drinking prevents a recurrence (like not smoking doesn’t reverse lung cancer once you’ve got it.) These days I still drink but nowhere near as much, and along with good food find a glass or two one of life’s pleasures.
I hate all this guilt around choices we makes about food and drink. We are not to blame for our cancer, nor personally responsible if it comes back or we die of it.
Jane
Thank you Jane - you have made me feel a lot less guilty about the odd tipple or two! It’s so hard to resist the urge to look for what it was that caused it in the hope we can stop it from coming back again, but like you said we’re not to blame, it’s no one thing you can put your finger on. Much better to have a life that you enjoy I think
xx
Wow, only just come back on site and am so pleased to read all your responses. I think the general concensus is that nobody’s sure about anything, let’s face it, if they were we’d be nearer solving the problem. Things do go round and round in your head though don’t they? If I’d done this or not done that, I also believe there is something in our make up, that we are born with a genetic fault, I have friends who have very similar lifestyles to mine, my sisters included, and who have not contracted BC. I have always eaten healthily, have three children, breast fed them all for at least 6 months, always exercised, am not overweight, started periods at 15, never smoked, my only vice is drinking alcohol which is why this particularly makes me feel guilty.
All your comments have made me feel so much better about things, I have an appointment with my onc on Monday, will ask his advice - “If your wife had breast cancer, would you advise her to give up alcohol?” or is that a bit mean?
I’m going to stop worrying, I don’t really much, just get on with enjoying life, but with this stuff in the paper and my 6 monthly appointment coming up, am getting my knickers in a twist.
Thanks for making me feel so much better everyone.
Cheers!!
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