Am I just being paranoid?

Hello
I am starting to panic. Last September, I had a primary dx and had a mx, chemo and radiotherapy, that finished in May. Since the middle of August (possibly when I moved the sofas looking for something) I have been suffering from backache. It comes and goes a bit, but it hurts for a part of every day.
So, when I had my 12 month checkup with the breast-surgeon, I mentioned my back (it had been hurting for about a month by then. He had a feel, said it felt muscular, but sent me off for an x-ray “just in case”, On Monday, a BCN rang to say that something looked odd on the x-ray, so they would like me to go for a scan. I was given the option of seeing a consulant before the scan, but the nurse said I wouldn’t get to learn much more than I did over the phone, so I decided to go straight for the scan.
I got my scan appt letter through on Wednesday, for a bone scan in the nuclear meds dept (so I get the injection, go off for 4 hours and then go back for the scan). I was pretty calm about this. Then, today, I got an outpatient appt for 4 days after my scan. The odd thing about it is that it isn’t with my onc, but with another. I decided to look up this other onc and see he specialises in breast and sarcomas. I then made the mistake of checking what Sarcoma is and good old wikipedia tells me it is malignant tumours made of cancerous bone.
To tell me that I am now stressed and wondering whether there is something they either didn’t tell me over the phone or that they suspect something pretty bad.
My rational side realises it could just be that my onc is on holiday so the “other” breast onc is seeing me to save me waiting, but my irrational side keeps creeping in.
Not sure what I expect anyone to say, but if anyone has any wise words…

Hi AmysMum

I’m sorry to hear that you are having a pretty tough time at the moment. I’m sure the users of this site will be along to support you soon.

In the meantime maybe you would like to talk to a member of our helpline staff who are there to offer emotional support as well as practical information. The free phone number is 0808 800 600 and the lines are open Monday to Friday 9.00 to 5.00 and Saturday 10.00 to 2.00.

Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator

No you are not being paranoid at all. When we have had cancer it is a rational fear so everything you are feeling I guess is normal. When do you go for your appointment ? and how old is Amy ?
Keep strong over the weekend, you can do it . Sending you big hugs Tracy

Hi Tracy
Thank you for replying. My scan is Monday 22nd and then the onc is Friday 26th. I am so hoping that it is just my onc being too busy that week or away on holiday or similar.
Amy is 6, so helps keep me busy at the weekends.
Sue

its no good anyone telling you not to worry,thats something we all do regardless of situations such as yours,but just wanted to wish you good luck and hoping its nothing serious,just another routine appointment.
best wishes,Di.x

Just wanted to say bless you amys mum - we have all mostly been in the waiting room and we all know the anxiety your feeling right now - I hate cancer and what it’s putting us all through - life itself is stressful enough sometimes - my thoughts are with u Hun - I think your right prob just a diff onc as yours already has appointment booked - finger toes crossed for u cxxx

Hi Sue,
I too had a bone scan as I had pains in my shoulder , and thankfully the scan just showed that it is wear and tear on my right side. I used to play badminton years ago so it must have been that. Waiting for the app is the worst part as we cannot stop our minds from racing away, but like you say just keep busy with Amy . It is lovely and sunny here in Derbyshire this morning so you could get some fresh air and collect some autumn leaves. Also my BCN knew that I was very worried so she got me the results the same day , but I m not sure if all hospitals can do that. I know she shouldnt have done it really , as you get a detailed report in the post. I then went for physio to help with the pain and she said I had been holding my body in a protective way and had put my shoulder out of line.
Sending you hugs and postive vibes to get through the next week. Tracy xxx

Hi Sue,
I will be thinking of you tomorrow and hoping and praying that it is nothing sinister and you can get on with your life with Amy. I bet she is all tucked up warm and cosy in bed ready for school in the morning .
Sending you big hugs and postive vibes for your scan and for the results on Friday. Please let us know .
Love Tracy xxx

Amysmum, yes, you ARE being paranoid, but after a BC diagnosis paranoia is completely understandable and completely normal.

I’ll keep things crossed for you tomorrow, and more importantly for the rest of the week while you get back in The Waiting Room, which we all know is the most horrible place to be.

Hi amysmum just want to wish you good luck for today and Friday,will keep everything crossed for you.I have always suffered on and off over the years with my back but this last 6 or so months it has gone about 4 times and when it does get better the pain never really goes altogether and also having probs with my neck.I have my 5 year Oncology appointment in November and should be discharged but know I have to mention the back and neck tut.Always looking over our shoulder er.
Praying for good results for you. Melxx

Thank you Mel.
I am sitting here, mildly radioactive, waiting to go back for the scan. I hope your 5-year appt goes well and your back and neck is just due to over-use.

Hi amysmum,
I am so sorry you are in the waiting room again - waiting for results from scans can be so hard.
I am very happy though to hear that your surgeon listened to your concerns, and asked for scans just in case. Thats really encouraging for the care you are receiving. Please don’t read to much in being seen by another oncologist, and what their specific area of expertise is. For some schools this week is half term holiday (and next week), and you regular oncologist may very well be on leave. I know in my hospital they want to give results of scans as soon as possible, to avoid anyone staying in the waiting room to long. They know how difficult this time is for us, and if this means that you could be seen sooner by another breast oncologist than your usual one, then they would choose to do that rather than make you wait. So I would fully agree with your rational side :slight_smile:
I hope all turns out to be fine for you. In the mean time please avoid dr google. Instead do things to distract you between now and your appointment, anything. If it involves something outdoors with your daughter - fresh air - even better. It’s autumn, perhaps you can go hunting for conkers in a local park, just anything that takes your mind off things, and brings some fun to you both.
Just hope this helps a bit. Wishing you the very best on Friday.
Christine