And another sleepless night to come!
And another sleepless night to come! Good Evening ladies,
I’ve just come here to moan as I feel sorry for myself at the moment. Does this never end? I’m not one for dwelling on things and 99.9% of the time don’t feel sorry for myself but this is really hard and I know that if anyone will understand how I feel right now it will be people here.
Had my routine mamogram last week on my remaining breast (2 years since mastectomy/recon and 15 years since original diagnosis) and have just come home from work to a message on my answering machine asking me to go at 9am tomorrow for further tests.
I know that they are probably just being cautious and I know that it may be nothing to worry about BUT I still feel sick with worry. My husband’s away and I guess I’ve got just too much time on my own for my imagination to run riot!!
Commonsense says that if they had seen anything major they would have contacted me straight away and not a week later BUT they must have seen something, right? I guess that as I had a small reduction to match the recon that maybe it could be scarring that they have seen.
I think I just need someone to tell me it will be ok, but no-one can.
Sorry for the ramble but I know you know how I feel and its something others really don’t understand.
Sharon x
Think I understand how you feel. Hi Sharon
I had my first diagnoses 21 years ago, I’ve read your profile and I had the same treatment as you minus the Tamoxifen. I had a recurrence 18 months ago when I had a mastectomy with LD reconstruction like you couldn’t have radiotherapy again. First time round I never for a minute thought it would come back especially after such a long time. Having returned once I feel it could well appear again although I must admit it doesn’t worry me too much most of the time.
Its only natural that you are worried and I don’t think it was a very good idea just leaving a message for you, if you had spoken to someone at least you could have asked questions, could be something quite simple and saved you a night of worry.
Please let me know how you get on and good luck for tomorrow.
Take care.
Jan
just read your post and hope all has gone well for you today. sharon-another one x
Friday 13th - no so unlucky! Jan/Taffy
Thank you both for your good wishes. I’m delighted to let you know that everything is ok. I’ve been scanned and had 2 more mammograms and the consultant at the assessment clinic is certain it’s nothing more than one bit of scar tissue sitting directly on top of another giving the unusual appearance.
I am really relieved - I’m sure you can imagine what was going through my mind last night. It made me realise again that we all live, somehow, with uncertainty and fear and however supportive our family and friends are they will never totally understand that feeling.
Jan - Our situations do seem very similar and like you I’m more aware of the possibility of the disease returning (particularly at the moment) but also determined not to waste too much time worrying about the possibility. I don’t know how you coped after so long but for me, knowing I had survived before helped me to deal with the 2nd diagnosis.
Taffy - I noticed in your profile that you have just been diagnosed with mild lymphoedema. At my last check-up ( just prior to the mammogram) my consultant told me that he thinks I have mild lymphoedema and I am waiting to see the specialist nurse. I was a bit surprised as I haven’t noticed any significant swelling, in fact the only thing I mentioned was a toothache type pain and heaviness in my arm. Do you had swelling?
Hope to speak to you both again - and thank-you again for your good wishes. Stay well and take good care.
Sharon x
Ooops ! Sorry - my news was sooo good I sent it twice!!!
S x
Hi Sharon I’ve sorted that out for you!
Best wishes
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Breast Cancer Care
So glad you are on a high after such great news-was feeling for you.My lypmhodema gives me achy arm and also heavy feeling.I noticed that tops were tight around top of my arm when they had previously been loose.Top part of my arm is more swollen than bottom apparently but lately my hand has swollen a lot more and fingers are stiff and achy and dont seem to go down .Am not wearing sleeve and glove they gave me every day because with the hot flushes fast and furious l find it too uncomfortable-but am going to have to wear it regularly l think.
take care! sharon x
Great Pleased to hear your good news Sharon, like you knowing I survived once has helped me to think I can do it again, no point in worrying about something that may never happen, deal with it if it does.
I bet your having a wonderful weekend.
Best wishes
Jan