Primary only, diagnosed 2004 at 45 and tuned 50 last year. Although I ought to feel increasingly optimistic as time goes on actually I don’t, as I feel I have had a good 5 years and it could still recur any time (not a good prognosis). So try to maintain just a dead-pan realistic approach, and make plans for the future, but not too many dreams…
I think an ‘older’ thread is a good idea JaneRA as there are different issues to be faced, hope you don’t mind the odd primary member.
well im 58 was 56 when diognosed with lobular left breats .had chemo mastectomy ,more chemo radiotherapy and then was told i have liver secs ,which thankfully are being kept at bay at the moment ,have just had bone scan re right side which was thankfullt clear but still have query re pain and very uncomfortable bruied feeling on ribs .i think it dosnt matter how old you are when diognosed its still a big shock and yes i want to make old bones but feel that option will not be my choice ,i just live everyday as i can ,the lymphodemia is a pain in the arm !! and i have 12 grandkids who are all gorowing up and bonny .wish i had more time to do the things i want to do but hey who said life was in our hands .lynn xx
Aw, shucks gals. Thank you for your kind comments. But let’s see what I have to say when time’s getting short for me. Then you’ll hear me whinge.
Yes, Jane, excellent thread, this. Thank you. You get planning your 60th, girl. I am. Mine’s in June.
I’ve always known I wouldn’t live to a ripe old age. So did my mum. She always said she didn’t want to live beyond 60, and she died of chronic asthma in her 60th year. My dad died 5 years previously, aged 59. The few occasions when the subject of death came up when I was younger and I’d say I wouldn’t live to be old, people would say oh, don’t be so morbid, don’t talk like that, of course you will. Last time I said it was when I was 55. I was diagnosed the following year. Ha ha ha.
In the meantime, let’s just carry on enjoying ourselves with all these wonderful cocktails of chemo, rads, meds, surgery, hospital appointments, weight gain, hair loss, fat arms, shopping trips for mastectomy bras and fat ass trousers. Not to mention the guilt trips when we indulge ourselves. No, actually, I take that one back. I don’t feel guilty anymore if I have pyjama days, can’t be bothered answering the phone, too much to drink of an evening, cancelling appointments (friends, hair, dentist, gp) because I just can’t be bothered. I’ll do what I like thank you very much.
Well I always knew I’d live to a ripe old age…cause my maternal grandparents did and my parents…just kindof ignored the female line on my dad’s side who don’t.
So I’m mightily pissed off about my early demise and can’t imagine ever being anything else…
Grannyscouse - I love the ‘no-one said it was fair’ comment.
I definitely come in the mature category (56) but still living, learning and doing my best to get the best out of every moment. At the moment I feel so well (arimidex) that I tend to forget the prognosis - on the other hand it has just dawned on me that I’d better get cracking on all these things I keep meaning to do as I can’t count on feeling this well next year - or even next month. So - carpe diem
On the list for this year (as long as the health stays OK)
See an opera at Glyndebourne
Go to the Cambridge Folk Festival (remember to get the tickets in time!)
Cycle from the north of France to the Med (not necessarily in one go…)
Finish planting up my garden
Go to the theatre more
Replace my current sensible car with a convertible…
learn to play the ukelele
anyone got any more suggestions ? I did think of looking out for a toy boy…
God - a toy boy - I’m sorry but I really cannot think of anything worse. I have enough young men suddenly appearing in my house in the morning brought homes like waifs and strays by my daughters. Thankfully they sleep in the spare bedrooms, but nevertheless it takes several years to air out the smell of a boy (toy or otherwise) from a room, and that’s usually just the stench of their trainers and socks. Anyway I’ve got a big list of things to do - in keeping with my inertia I havn’t done a damn thing about arranging any of them. I have been thinking about seeing Bob Dylan in Paris but need more motivation. Saw Leonard Cohen at Glastonbury last year and he was absolutely terrific. I do feel I should work my way through the old rockers just in case they die before me!
Just posted but must have pressed the wrong key and - wush! - it went into cyperspace!!
Here we go again. Cleared out drawers in desk recently. Feel much better about that. Found a photo of me and siblings when I was 10!!
Granddad wants to visit all county towns so I googled them in. Ashamed to say that, prior to dx and since, we’ve only visited Carlisle, Lancaster, Manchester, Chester, London … and I think that’s it!! Nottingham’s next on list. I went there years ago when Torvill and Dean won the Olympics and I saw them skate. I went to Ye Olde Trip to Jerusalem (got the sweatshirt) and he who must be obeyed wants to go because someone in work’s been and raved about it) so hopefully we’re off there in the very near future. Anyone from Nottingham, helpful hints gratefully accepted.
Manon - I nearly always go to the Folk Festival - have been known to leave during aforesaid, and nip up to Addenbrookes for chemo.
I can certainly help you achieve that goal. Will nag you nearer May, when the tickets go on sale (and have friends in the trade who can sort the tickets). It is great and we always have a cozy little campsite (for those who stay) and an area packed with comfy chairs and bottles of wine for the daytime proceedings.
Granny S - Can only agree with Belinda (yet again) and suggest you head down East Anglian way. We have had some lovely meetings and would love to extend the invite to anyone who is interested.
That would be great Jenny - 2008 was the third year in a row I left it too late! Grannyscouse - would be nice to meet… East Anglia has its attractions even if it’s depressingly short of hills - I speak as a non local (immigrant from Wales)
x Barbara
Another “old-ish biddy” here! I was a post-menopausal 47at primary dx in 1997, and 53 in 2003 for my bone & liver mets dx – looking forward to my 59th birthday next month. I’m with GrannyScouse on getting on with things, and definitely with Jenny & Belinda on meeting up! In fact, have been meeting up with Jenny & Belinda (and others, some of whom post here) for several years, and will do again at least a couple of times this year, including at the beach in the Summer. Have also met GrannyScouse recently, and look forward to repeating that some time soon (hint ;-))! Simply couldn’t deal with having BC mets without the wonderful support of others in the same position – on line and in person. Have met spectacular women (many sadly no longer with us) and had plenty of roaringly fun times – just what we need, whatever our treatments or prognoses.
My mum is loving this thread - she believes the same shes not worrying about the stats shes focussing on starting chemo and planning hol with my dad and sister to come visit me here in Turkey! it seems to be my dad and sis at the moment who are findiing it hard to deal with and looking too far forward where as my mum is very much a day at a time person!
just an update my mum has found out today that she will start her herceptin on Thursday and has been accepted on the avastin trial, so knowing that shes actually to start treatment soon has really picked her up.
thanks so much for thr tips - they are duly noted. ive spoke to my mum and she said once her head is functioning a bit better she would like to give you a call!! my mums off ehr food at the min anyway to be honest so i will jst tell her to eat what she fancies and to stop fighting her body’s urge to sleep - she hates it cos she thinks shes being lazy!!! will let her know about watching her temp.
Thanks again for your help, and all our love to you xx
Good news delivic. Great stuff. Barbara, I shall certainly watch out for old rockers for you - poor woman. I should say that I am originally from Suffolk, spent my youth at the Harbour Inn in Southwold, performed at the Aldeburgh Festival in youth theatre, and lived in and had my children in Bury St. Edmunds, Ilove the flatlands. Hills are such pointless things to me. Big skys are much better!
