I finally got my results from my mastectomy and node clearance 
All but one of the nodes they took came back positive which was my absolute worst fear at this stage. I’m holding onto the fact that one was negative. I was told I need to have a body scan and I have been given the go ahead for a holiday next week which I’m a bit nervous about but have managed to get insurance. I’m going for my children, they need it after the crappy summer holiday we were given this year! Then il be back for results of scan and a plan for chemo which is due to start in about 4 weeks!
Friends and family are great and really holding onto the positives even though I can’t really see them, I just feel numb! I’m terrified of yet another lot of results which could turn my world even more upside down! Every couple of weeks is like another slap in the face, this isn’t supposed to happen 
F*** you cancer!
do ring the number on here and speak to a nurse or the someone like me option day at a time and step by step it’s a lot to process and things and treatment plan can change all along the way as they fit it specifically to you as it needs before chemo do get your teeth checked with dentist oral hygiene is important, they will fit you in at dentist when you tell them you are starting chemo get a thermometer to check your temperature during chemo also if you are not cold capping get your wig voucher, ask your team about this, book your look good feel better session at your local Macmillan I had a little notebook and took notes at meeting and wrote my questions down and their answers, I also did graphs each week of cycle so I could keep track of when I’d taken the meds that go along with chemo and track of my temperature during chemo, just mentioning because that helped me. Do join the chemo thread then you’ll all get each other through together if you want do everything your way in your own time you are in control even if you don’t feel you are 
Shi (Community Champion BCN Forum)
That’s all great advice thank you. I didn’t even think about the dentist! I am definitely going to look at booking the look good feel better course. I have also booked a final haircut and roots for a couple of weeks time, if I’m going to lost my hair I want to do it whilst it looks good 
What is the wig voucher? X x
The wig voucher is a voucher you are able to use against the cost of a wig and your team should tell you about this and how to get one also check out your Macmillan at your trust, they usually have pre loved wigs that you can purchase for a donation. And also luvyababes do a good range and if you are in a city/town there are hair shops that have wigs/extensions and hair products and makeup, not sure if you know what I mean but usually a little independent shop on the high street or inside a market, but like a pop up shop but they usually have a good range of wigs, real hair and synthetic but I’m not sure if you could use the voucher there but there synthetic wigs were usually around£20 mark with real hair ones upto £100, where the actual wig shops you can usually use the voucher in the real hair ones can be a lot more expensive than that. I also painted my nails black it helped me keep mine during and after chemo it was a tip someone else had passed on, on the forum and worked well for me so wanted to share with you Shi xx (Community Champion BCN Forum)
Great advice