Hi Susanne
I think you’ve hit the nail on the head. It is initially not knowing how we are going to be affected or for how long. Once we have a few cycles we can get ourselves into the routine. My 6 year old is even getting into the routine of knowing how I am going to be feeling and being less demanding when I am not feeling good, flip side, expecting me to make up for it in my ‘good’ week.
My nails are beginning to lift a lot now to the point I can see underneath the nails. Fairly gross! For some reason my thumb nails aren’t as bad as the finger nails.
Best wishes to all
Snoogle
x
Hi everyone.
I had my first Tax on Thursday and since Saturday night I’ve been in agony with pain through my whole body. It even hurts to move my eyes. I got off so easily with FEC and this has come as a real shock. I can’t stand it much longer and hope it wears off soon. Can’t get used to other people having to do everything for me either. I feel so useless. Thank God I only have 2 more to go.
Any tips on how to ask people for help. I’ve always been very independent and I’m totally useless at it. I end up feeling angry and frustrated that they don’t seem to know what I need without asking for it!! How pathetic.
Jan xx
Hi Jan - big hugs to you, I know what you’re going through my first tax was like that. All I can say is take whatever painkillers you are recommended to take and it will ease off.
As you can see from other comments for some each cycle of tax gets better for others worse. I was fortunate neither my 2nd nor 3rd tax were as bad as the first. I now just have one more to go.
I’m also hopeless at asking for help, always expect my OH to know what to do then get cross when he doesn’t - poor man.
Clare
Hi Jan, it’s hard isn’t it. I still find it hard to ask for help, but even my kids are saying to me that if I can’t do anything or need help then I should ask. Finding it very strange asking DH to do things that I would normally do, but at least he feels like he is doing something to help. I found it really hard asking friends for help with the kids. Felt like I was putting on them, but so far help has and is being given with good heart and no expectation for me to return the favour, although I do what I can to reciprocate in my ‘good’ weeks.
I agree with Clare’s advice take whatever painkillers you are recommended. If they don’t work speak to your oncologist or gp and ask them to prescribe something stronger. I did!
Snoogle
x
hi jan,
if its any consolation,ive been the same,took my tax tuesday (first) after three epi which i got by ok on.What a shocker ! Aches in muscles i never even knew i had,up my bum down my foo foo,i think ive had every side effect on the fact sheet and been bedridden since thursday,feeling bit better today just so weak prob from minimum food.
We can do this
take care
sharon
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Just sitting here reading about all the side effects on Tax , I have my second dose on Friday and I actually said to a friend I think they gave me water lol … apart from upset tum no real side effect but saying that the fec cycle always put me to bed for 10 days so not got off with it that light going to see onc in a mo so just going to wright a list always forget stuff when I go …
I know next lot may be harder hope not …
Lisa x
Hello all,
Sharon, I had the same… all the possibl SE on the list on my first and second tax. The oncologist decided to lower the dosage (from 148 mg to 111 mg) and it was much better on the third. I hope they can do it for you too, it makes all the difference.
Sonia xxx
Thanks folks.
Sorry that some of you have the same problems but I take comfort from it too. Glad you’re feeling a bit better Sharon. Thankfully, I’m feeling much better today too. I still have some pain but it’s the marrow booster pain now which is much less intense. I’ll ask about painkillers before my next treatment. Over the counter ones have done nothing at all. At least I know how long it’s likely to last each time and hopefully it won’t get any worse.
I’m lucky and unlucky at the same time not having any children. On the one hand I don’t have to worry about how they’ll be looked after when I’m incapable. Equally, it means I have no grown up ones to help look after me. Neighbours have all offered help but who wants virtual strangers seeing them at their worst. Might just have to swallow my pride eventually. OH has been taking time off work but I can’t see his employers putting up with it for much longer.
Lisa, I know what you mean about the water. I lost my hair on FEC but it was virtually the only SE. Strange how we react totally differently to the various drugs.
Jan xx
You know, you should work out some things you’re OK to let your neighbours do for you. People really want to help out, and one day you might be in a position to help them. I’m lucky as Mr.Grumpy has retired, but he can’t mow the lawns so the guy next door does it - at one point I said I was feeling guilty and would get a gardener in, but he looked so hurt I backed off. My other neighbour gets my daily paper and a few odd bits of shopping on my bad weeks - if Mr.Grumpy goes to the shop he gets fags, which is not a good idea as he has emphysema.
Hi Jan,
Susanne is right. Find out what you are comfortable letting others do for you. One of my neighbour’s mums was staying recently and virtually demanded I give her my ironing to do! This lady has become someone I can have really frank conversations with when she visits and who gives me really positive encouragement. Plus, I can easily let someone else do the ironing :-). I have had offers from childcare, to ironing, to just having a coffee and a rant! When people offer I do say to them that they should be honest about what they can offer because at some stage I will probably take them up on it! This tends to sort the real offers from the sympathy offers (when people offer because they don’t know what else to say, but don’t really mean it!).
Just think of everything you have done for everyone/anyone else in your life and think of this as those kindnesses being returned, even if they are not by the same people! You never know, you could be letting a true friend into your life!
Sorry if I sound a bit emotional/bossy/chatshowhost! Having one of those days!
Snoogle
x
I agree with the others,im a very independent busy lady,worked part time in my local hotel reception and ran my own nail and tanning business as well as having three small children at home.
WELL i should put that in past tense lol I WAS very independent.
I tend to over do things and end up in a big weak pile!
I now have a local charity help out with ironing,cleaning and gardening,this frees up qquality time (wen healthier days) to spend with the hubby and kiddies.
Ive put back into the charity by having my headshaved and raising over a thousand pounds and once this nightmare is finished i will continue to fund raise for them theyre fantastic.
This illness certainly does make you realise the say’ers from the do’ers and im shocked realy at the outcome !
Ive seen my dad once since i started chemo in april and that was only due to my birthday and i was hospitalised! ggrrrr wont start there tho this was sposed to be a positive post lol.
Hope everyones ok today.
Im hoping to get out of hospital…sooooo positive (at the mo lol)
Keep chin up everyone and kick ass
love sharon
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Hi all again today!
Good for you Sharon!
Ditto with the lack of family support! I would have expected a lot more from my siblings who are all older than me. But then even as a young child I was always the sensible, reliable and organised one. It’s times like this I really miss my mum. One of my husband’s aunts who is like a grandmother to our kids has phoned me virtually every day (excluding her own hospitalisation). Blood is definitely not thicker than water!
You are right with it being a shock about who are the do’ers and who are the say’ers. I have been quite surprised by some people and perhaps a little disappointed by others. But I guess we all react in our own way and I am certainly not judging anyone.
Snoogle
x
Just reading the above make me realise how lucky I am when Im at my worst my mom and best friend do all house work ironing washing ect ,and when Im feeling well my mom spends timee in her caravan in wales to recharge her batteries for the next session . The big thing that bothers me is it should be me looking after her now she been the best mom ever and shes not getting any younger but she walks all the way to mine and flys round the house cleaning .
Thats one thing I hate about this is takes away our independence I now have lympadima (soory spelling not good ) and thats really been a pain its stopping me doing so much and just had appointment to go to lymp clinc at the end of the month . what a joke Im going to ring now and tell them …
sorry just fed up and heat not helping lol …
speak soon Lisa
Thanks for the encouragement everyone.
My mum and older sister came round last night for a visit. I wouldn’t have dreamed of asking them but they insisted on doing some housework. I refused of course, (mum is 73 and has just finished rads for lung cancer) but they took advantage of me being stuck in the loo with diarrhoea, lol:-) Mum kept the dog busy outside while sis washed the kitchen floor. I was a bit mortified at first but they just got on with it and made me promise to tell them next time I’m unwell.
I will take all your advice about finding things I’m comfortable with the neighbours doing. I do have really good neighbours and I know it’s my pride that stops me letting them help. My mum gave me a good talking to about that last night too. She’s just like me and says if she can do it so can I.
Well done Sharon to be so organised, you’ve inspired me to make some attempt to get regular help. Sorry about your dad. I’ve had some relatives disappear into the woodwork too. Fortunately none of my closest ones. My best friend gives as much moral support as she can but she’s living in America. She comes home for visits regularly though. We plan them round the good days and she makes me do fun things.
Hope you are all having a good day today.
Jan xxx
Hello all,
I have the same experience with people promising to help. Even my ex has seen his son only once in 3 months (I have full custody). My son is 14 but it is still work and as you all know, teenagers promise to help too but you have to repeat 100 times before they move. My ex-mother-in-law is the most helpful as she takes my son for week-ends here and there.
My husband cooks and helps at cleaning the house but, another well known fact, they can’t do it as good as we do lol. So it’s getting more on my nerves when he tries to clean the house and I prefer to do it myself during the good days. Women must have better cleaning genes lol.
Soniaxxxxxxx
Hello everyone,
It’s awfully quiet in here… the last post was mine 4 days ago. How is everybody doing?
I was wondering if anyone experienced fluid retention while on Taxotere. I am usually skinny and unable to take a pound even if I eat quite a lot. But in the last 2 weeks, I have gained 6 pounds. My legs hurt and feel heavy. I will see the oncologist next Wednesday and ask him about it but I thought I would ask here first.
I hope you are all doing well.
Sonia
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Hi Sonia
You may find the BCC fact sheet on taxotere helpful as it discusses how it works, its benefits and the possible side effects. If you would like a copy just follow the link below:-
breastcancercare.org.uk/upload/pdf/taxotere_jan_08_0.pdf
I hope this is helpful.
Kind regards
Sam (BCC Facilitator)
Hi Sonia, I had fluid retention on Taxotere, very puffy ankles and general feeling of bloatedness. A few extra pounds too! It did resolve once I’d finished the chemo. Best wishes, Pat x
Hi Sonia,
I’m skinnny too,but have a very bloated tum with the Tax,hope it goes soon! I had my last chemo 10 days ago,numbness in fingers and toes along with horrible tingling,like pins & needles but makes my hands feel itchy,anyone know how long this lasts for?
Little H xx
Thank you all for you help.
Do we have to reduce liquid intake ? I was trying to drink 2 litres of water per day, as suggested by the oncologist. But I haven’t yesterday.
Last Tax next Wednesday, I can’t wait!!!
Sonia xx