I had my lumpectomy 2 weeks ago. A nurse removed the dressing so now I just have sutures. I am keeping the sutures dry because I dread them coming off. I am having shallow baths and cant even face having a shower in case they get wet. I know this is unrealistic because of course they will come off but I just can’t face looking at the scar. Has anyone got any tips on how I can move forward.
6 Likes
I was exactly the same. I just covered most of my mastectomy scar and uncovered a tiny bit to look at and slowly built up how much I saw over a few days. With regard to washing, I use a flannel so I don’t have to touch it x
5 Likes
@mela so many emotions I know x I had a mastectomy just last week.
Could you ask someone you trust to look at your scar and describe it to you first?
5 Likes
I’m exactly the same and I’m months after surgery (therapeutic mammoplasty so both breasts, scarring under and through, nipple replacement added and removal on other). I can’t look or directly touch, am like an ostrich getting washed lol, and using washcloths rather than hands. I know I’m potentially building a problem here but I just trust I will do it in time. I like the suggestion of asking a really good (and willing) friend to look first. I think it takes a while to accept the new changes, for me anyway. Good luck x
5 Likes
So sorry you are struggling @mela You are only 2 weeks past and that’s no time at all 
My lumpectomy scar is the entire way around my nipple and my 2nd lumpectomy went back through on one side of it. That part is still covered with the hospitals bandage.
My first lumpectomy was really quite sore and I hated getting it wet also. I actually kept it bandaged too long which hindered healing. I wasnt comfortable with it at all. What helped was wearing a sanitary towel stuck to my bra. It just made me feel like it was more protected. I had to really push myself to oil the scar daily also. I wont lie its not comfortable but the more I did it the easier it became. I actually really love my scar now. And I’m ok with my new shape boob. I thought that would really bother me but I really don’t mind. Ive accepted its different… and why is it different? Because I needed an operation to save my life.
I have no idea what my new nipple will look like after the 2nd op and I am a little nervous but I am going to try and think the same. It is different but it’s for a good reason
3 Likes
Well ladies. I had my mastectomies 18 and 7 years ago. I look at my scars every day and remember that they are the reason I’m still alive, and able to enjoy my life as I do. You need to look after them and pamper them a bit with oil and moisture so you help them start to blend a little. Hopefully one day as your lives move forward you will start to cherish them too.
Sending you all love
Eily
12 Likes
Be kind to yourselves, I didn’t look till stitches were out and kept everything well moisturised with aqueous cream (got minimal scarring) using that worked well for me, I had a therapeutic mamoplasty in 2017 and levelling up other side 2023. After therapeutic mamoplasty and still dazed from the whole diagnosis and speed of how quick treatments progressed when stitches were out and I was ready I spoke to my body and said this is us now, let’s try and do the best we can each day. I still have to wear a bra leveller which I get from evenly bra balancers but prior to that because nothing else worked I did level myself up using vision stuffing. Everything in your own time and the breast cancer now nurses are on here for you you can call the number
Shi xx
4 Likes
Hi, I didn’t want to look at my mastectomy scars but when I saw my surgeon for a check up, when he took the dressing off he basically made me look which sounds harsh but glad he did as whilst it is hard to see it really was not as bad as I had built up in my head. Sometimes we make it worse by imagining the worst especially when we have gone through the BC nightmare.
9 Likes
I had a mastectomy. I didn’t look for ages. I just sort of ignored it, but it was a bit painful so I smeared Rescue Remedy cream which helped with the discomfort. Also once it healed, after two weeks I had a warm shower every night before bed, and the feeling of the water was a joy.
I went to a hairdresser a couple of times for a hairwash, because I couldn’t wash it in the shower to start with. That was lovely too, having someone else wash my hair.
The mirror in my shower room is face height, and sideways, so I don’t have to look unless I want to. Gradually as time has gone on, I am happier to look.
3 Likes
I ought to be honest and say that I really don’t want anybody else looking, apart from the surgeon to check it. I wouldn’t voluntarily show it to anyone, even though I have never been shy or private about my body.
My husband catches a glimpse occasionally, and makes positive comments.
4 Likes
I’m 3 weeks post lumpectomy now and was feeling the same dread once the dressing came off. I took short glances at the scar area first and once the sutures were off, I let the water from the shower wash over the area. I haven’t still looked in detail but am able to gently wash over the scar area now. Wishing you well on your journey.
3 Likes
Hi there, me too. I had a double mastectomy with immediate reconstruction 13 years ago and had no trouble looking at that, but more surgery two days ago removing three new tumours and my implants, leaving me flat, I just can’t face it. I guess we just don’t push ourselves, we can look when we’re ready and not before, no matter how long that takes. No-one’s forcing us to look, let’s just be kind to ourselves and take it slowly.
2 Likes
Dear Mela I had lumpectomy and my nipple removed 18 months ago as the cancer was close by. The first look is the worst look, although I was surprised how neat my scar was. 18 months later, it just is what it is. Showing my husband was the worst, but his remark that he still had me in his life and that’s all that mattered was so important to me.
Dear friend, be brave. Take yourself into the bathroom and take a look.
3 Likes
Hey mela, it’s really tough! Try and look at it just to check it’s dry and intact ok. It’s so hard, I was v v tearful after my mastectomy but I felt much better when I got rid of all those sticky plaster bits and saw the wound was nice and clean. (And then I got some lovely bras with pockets for my prosthesis which made me feel great…) . The important thing is you got rid of the cancer…… Jox
3 Likes
When I had my lumpectomy, my dressing and steristrips became my comfort blanket. I felt by keeping them on, I was somehow “supporting” the wound and I didn’t have to move into the stage of post op healing. When a nurse eventually gently removed them I found it hard to look at/ touch the rather puckered scar. But the relief of being able to wash properly! And I found massaging the scar with oil weirdly soothing. It became a nighttime ritual. 5 months on my scar is smooth and almost invisible- I can’t quite believe it. Thinking of you - it will all be fine!
2 Likes
You have put into words exactly how I am feeling so thankyou.
1 Like
Hiya, just to say, it’s still early days, give yourself some grace 
I’m 4 weeks post lumpectomy and really struggled as well but it got easier. I was relieved I couldn’t look to begin with, I was glad of the dressing.
I had regular dressing changes with the nurse at my gp practice and still couldn’t look but did have a quick peek after a couple of weeks. I lost my nipple and my scar goes literally from one side to the other. I did cry when I first saw it.
2 more weeks on and I feel a bit different. I heard someone call her mastectomy scars her life lines, she said they saved her life. I now get that, I feel similar.
Give yourself time and be kind to yourself. X