Hello a tad off topic and I apologise if I offend anyone.
I was diagnosed with breast cancer last year, had surgery and treatment, it’s not the end, it never will be. The thought of recurrence is horrendous. Learning to live with it, life goes on.
I’ve been single for 7 years, only recently have I been serious about meeting someone. I’ve dipped in and out of various dating sights never thought it would be so hard to meet someone at 57 and cancer throwing a spanner in the works.
I am independent and comfortable in my own skin would love someone special in my life but don’t need one.
It’s seems incredibly hard to meet anyone genuine and yesterday had the ultimate kick in the teeth when who I thought was ok ghosted me after I kept him up to speed, chatted for a week daily and he had asked me to meet him for dinner, hurt a bit.
So my question is do you advertise it in your profile and chances are attract the weirdo’s or gage when to do the big reveal. It is never a good time.
Honestly I am stumped, hurt and I know he’s not worth it if the comment I am half a boob down with a dodgy armpit scares him off. I made light of it and laughed and he disappeared into the night, not the first but I was getting better vibes from him.
Advice would be appreciated x
Firstly, I’m really sorry this happened to you!! Secondly, that guy obviously wasn’t worth being in your awesome presence. I dont have the experience with dating after cancer as my situation is completely different to yours but I just wanted to hop on here and say, please don’t feel the need to hide what you’ve been through. Its part of your story (as much as its a crap part) and whoever you meet in the future needs to take you as you are, crap story parts and all. The type of man thats going to run after hearing that you’re amazing and went through this and came out the other side, totally not worth it. Don’t give them the power to hurt you. Remember who you are, show up and ALLOW them to be graced with your presence. You’ve got this lady 
Hi @louise67 He’s not worth I have not had this experience myself , but a friend was in a similar situation and met someone after a double MX so don’t loose hope there’s somone out there for you Xx
Just to echo what the others have said really . I’ve not been on any online dating sites but I know people who have . For every Prince there are a thousand frogs out there and people who appear to be reasonable and OK at first glimpse turn out not to necessarily be so. It’s difficult to know when to introduce these things but at your age ( which is very close to mine ) it’s a reasonable expectation that most people will have scars - mental , physical or both . Obviously if you were to meet you would need to tell someone and though it’s nothing to be ashamed of so I don’t see it as something you need to explain too soon either . BC is part of your history but it doesn’t define you. I think you are thinking that he is looking at you as damaged goods which obviously you aren’t - none of us on here are but it could be that he’s had some personal experience with cancer or breast cancer in particular and it’s brought up bad memories . Or maybe he’s a bit shallow and immature .
After a couple of years of internet dating and a brief failed marriage to Mr. Wrong my hopeless romantic of a friend who has not had cancer but has other health issues including some pretty impressive physical scars and is older than both of us met a man online and is very happily married . You will meet someone who deserves you xx
I’m also recovering from chemo and surgery, yet to have radiotherapy and am single but wanting to find someone to settle down with. I feel yr pain. I had enough problems finding any decent men on dating websites before cancer so don’t fancy my chances post cancer. I’ve been single for years and have only ever had disappointing relationships through dating websites. I’m not sure I could face dating websites again. Try the app “meet up” as there may be social events going on in your area where you can meet people organically. That’s my plan when I’m better. Good luck with it all.
How very dare he - and it seems to me you have had a lucky escape from that particular “date”.
Do not allow such an “idiot” to dent your self-respect, which I am sure you have built through the way you conduct yourself in your life. Live your life. Far better that have found out about him now than later?
Hey,
This guy sounds like a massive loser and immature! I haven’t started dating yet after starting my cancer treatment so don’t feel I can give advice on that, but I gave up years ago on online dating as I found it so hard to meet anyone who was compatible from an online description! I think someone mentioned meet up and have to say that is how I try to meet people now. There are also loads of Facebook groups for different interests which run events so may be worth a search for some common interest groups near you xx
Thanks for all the lovely replies. It’s a mind field, after I was invited to another friend’s wedding met on line I thought I would give it another shot.
Who would have thought trying to meet someone to share interests with, coffee and dinner would be so hard. I am not scared of being on my own just get lonely.
X