Catastrophising

I’m 44. Found a lump this week. Attended a breast clinic on Wednesday. Confirmed not a cyst and was ‘suspicious’. Biopsied the lump and lymph nodes too because they looked concerning. Told to bring someone with me for results on Monday night.

In my less positive moments I focus on what I think I know: 1. it’s suspicious and they wouldn’t say this lightly 2. at 4cm it’s large 3. I have small boobs I’m pretty sure it appeared quickly so must be aggressive 4. The radiographer said some of lymph nodes were ‘rounded’ - it’s spread.

Trying really hard to be brave but feeling very bleak

Tryingtobebrave sorry you find yourself here but glad you’ve reached out to bcn and the forum. We’ve got you :two_women_holding_hands: and we understand please hold onto till a professional tells you, you have breast cancer you do not have breast cancer if on Monday when you get results you do then please do reach out to bcn and everyone here if you need to :two_women_holding_hands: step by step bcn is here for you do reach out if you need to till you get your results like you have, we’ve all had the it can’t be and some people who like you have reached out did not have breast cancer you are doing great, you are breast aware and gone and got everything checked out bcn is here for you :two_hearts: :two_hearts: :sparkles: :sparkles: Shi xx

2, 3 and 4 are not accurate yet. There may be inflammation in your body accounting for lymph node appearance and there are many things that cause that besides cancer. And even if it’s in the lymph nodes, that doesn’t mean spread all over the body. Being in the lymph nodes is common and is handled with treatment. Very few people have distant spread when diagnosed. Also, 4 centimeters would be considered intermediate. Not large. Large is over 5 centimeters. 

I know how bad you feel. We all do. I stayed curled up in the fetal position in my closet more times than I care to admit. This period of time is just awful and it’s awful for everyone. However, we all move past it and you will, too. Hold tight, remember what Shi said and you don’t have cancer until someone tells you that. And if you do get the worse news, it’s still going to be okay. This is a club no one wants to be in but if you have to have a cancer diagnosis it’s one of the best ones. Good company and a plethora of treatments. If you need us, we’re here, but remember. This is temporary and shall pass. 

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