Jackie thanks for that quote you put up. I found it very inspiring. Sorry to hear about hib and potential delays but hope it all works out for you. Wtp I know exactly what you mean about how even the word chemo turns the stomach. When I am in this seemingly endless state of low level queasiness so many things turn my stomach! Tastes, smells, words, even thinking about certain things. I seem to have so many nausea triggers!
I do agree that we should access talking therapies and counselling if it is available. I am in London so I have an appointment at the Haven and I’m looking forward to anything they can offer me, including some counselling. I feel I have a lot to be counselled about . I lost my much loved sister to bc eleven years ago. Then a year after that I had my first brush with bc when I was diagnosed with dcis and had a mastectomy. Now this. I feel it will be really helpful to just talk about it all. I agree we can’t always talk to our close friends and families as we’re busy putting on a brave face for them.
Hope everyone has a good day today. It’s very stormy here. R x
I’m so sorry to hear about your sister Robin - to lose someone you love to this dreadful disease then have to go through it (twice!) too is just so cruel and unfair.
We lost my father-in-law very suddenly to bowel cancer in the summer. My mother-in-law goes to a support group now - other ladies who have lost their husbands to cancer. She finds it really helpful as they sort of understand parts of it better and she says she can talk to them without worrying about upsetting them, if you know what I mean. She might access a counsellor too when the time feels right.
My husband is seeing one through his work who happens to be a cancer counsellor and it has been so helpful as he can talk about his dad and also what is happening with me.
The power of talking therapies is amazing.
Thinking of you and sending much love.
Xxxx
Hi lovely ladies
Sounds like it’s been a bit of a tough week for everyone. I am due my third FEC tomorrow and the dread of it has been building up in my head over the last couple of days. It is my final FEC before starting T and everyone keeps saying you are half way through after tomorrow, I know they all mean well, but I know (as you all do) that tomorrow is the easy bit it’s the following week that I have to get through. Jackie your quote is inspiring and a reminder that we can do this.
I seem to be the opposite of most of you ladies in that I had a mastectomy first (my tumour was grade 2, lobular and 7cm and they wanted it out ASAP ). They then found it had spread to my lymph nodes so I had all those taken out and then 4 weeks later I started chemo.
Everyone’s treatment seems to differ slightly but I guess all you can do is trust the doctors.
I have just read a good book, which was recommended to me by a friend who has also been through BC treatment. It is called “Tea and Chemo” by Jackie Buxton and it is about her own experience of BC but she writes with compassion and humour and I found it reassuring and could relate to a lot of what she said. She also explains treatment and scans in lay man terms and I gave it to my mum to read, who found it informative and gave her an insight into what this journey entails.
Anyway hope you all have a good weekend
nicky xx
Thanks wtp for your kind words. A lady in the December group also lost her sister to bc but much more recently than me, only a year ago, so I know I am far from alone.
Ebim I too went to a lgfb workshop today and thoroughly enjoyed it. Also the whole time I was there I didn’t think about my side effects once. Which is not to say they are all in my head but I do think that if I distract myself sufficiently they do seem to lessen. Lots of distractions required!
The goody bag is lovely and we all had great fun applying all the products in a supportive atmosphere. R x
Hello fellow warriors.
YAAAAAAAAY!
I had my third TC today.
I’m half way through.
My white cells were at 12.00 so WAY up.
As I thought, I have to pay for the Emend - rubbish insurance company, so was expecting a huge bill.
Good old Spain. Most drugs are cheaper here so I only had to pay €90. Relief from nausea is so worth that.
Due to the severe neutropenia that produced BOB I asked if I could have it again, and he sent me home with 5 injections of Filgrastim.
I’ll have to pay for this again - any idea how much it is in the uk?
Wtp2016 - it must be hard with your OH away. I couldn’t cope without mine.
Robin - so glad the quote helped. I’m always searching for them, as I too find them inspiring.
I lost my sister 55 years ago when I was 10.
I still miss her now - so big hugs to you.
I agree with Wtp - talking therapy is invaluable.
Nicky I’m like you.
I had radical MX and lymph node clear in December and started chemo 4 weeks after. I may just get that book.
Hope your treatment went well today and your SEs are reduced.
Ebim - glad you found the quote helpful.
I’m very jealous of all of you going to the LGFB workshops.
I did look to see if there were any in Spain but drew a blank.
Live and hugs to all - have a good weekend.
Hope all you lovely teddies are having a good sort of weekend. Weather is bad here and that doesn’t help lift the mood.
I’ve been scrolling back through the thread to remind myself what’s going on.
Jackie - glad you got Emend, even though you have to pay for it. I’m sorry you lost your sister too and thanks for the hugs. We never stop missing them, do we?
Mooney - chemo buddy, hope you’re ok. You’ve been very quiet for a while.
Nicky - hope FEC 3 went well. I agree the dread of next chemo rather spoils the ‘good’ days in the cycle. I might order that book.
Wtp - hope EC 4 went well and your relatives are looking after you well while your husband’s away.
Blue - good news on lump shrinkage and your boys sound really lovely.
Ebim, Slowski, Egg and anyone else I’ve missed out - hope you’re all doing ok.
Take care everyone. R x
Hey Suze/chemo buddy and others,
Like many of you, am feeling good to have FEC3 done but daunted by the journey still to come. I’ve not had any actual sickness this time but lots of sore redness around veins, armpits and neck. Also, we have been to 2 social functions this weekend, and on the one hand its great as I’ve felt able to go, normal life etc etc, but on the other hand I feel rather spaced out and weird now. I think it must be the famous chemo brain fog. Everyone in my life is really monumentally supportive but I must say it is a haven to come on here and connect with my ‘fellow travellers’.
Enjoy the rest of the weekend ladies and look after yourselves.Xx
Hi Suze. I’m on same treatment path as you - surgery, FEC T, radiotherapy. Like you I’ve finished FEC and am getting nervous about the T. My first T will be March 8th. I think I will take your advice about speaking to someone from the Someone like you programme.
I’m feeling quite upbeat tonight as away with my husband in a hotel. Change of scene, walks, log fires, gin and tonics, dinner, all help to lift spirits. Feel better when I’m in my wig too, just don’t want to wear it at home all the time.
Hope we all have a good week. Good luck to those teddies having treatment this week. I’ve got my good week ahead - side effects finished more or less and no chemo - bliss. R x
Good evening all!
Its day 5 and i’m just coming around from the fog of Tax number 3…one more Tax to go! I feel slightly euphoric when the fog lifts and I start to feel better and quickly (fortunately!) forget the misery of just a few days ago! My lump is really uncomfortable tonight - throbbing/aching. Has anyone else had that? I hope it’s because it’s dying a painful death…?!
Robin, good on ya, having a ‘normal’ break away. I have to remind myself to keep living through this and not put my life on hold until it’s all over with. It’s easier said than done though and have given my excuses to friends both today and tomorrow, so seriously, and Slowski too, good on ya for continuing to live your life! I think that someone like you programme sounds just what I need Suze. I’m going to look into it as I think I’d really benefit from seeing the other side of where i am now.
And Jackie, I agree…yaaaaay!!
Afternoon all - hope everyone is doing well. Im dozing on the sofa after fec 3 so the halfway milestone for me. No cold cap this time so a lot quicker and as yet no headaches. I thought id feel more elated as i have been busy telling interested people of that marker but feel strangely flat. I had a friend younger than me die last Friday from secondary Bc which I thought i was handling well but i suspect it’s erking in the back of my mind and contributing to the flatness. She was amazingly positive throughout her journey, even right up to the end so i am hoping i can pull myself back to that state.
On a different note I canvased opinion in the unit today re mouthwash and when best to take to try and prevent ulcers - i think it was robin who i had chatted with about this as i had previously been told its just for relief only. Positively the other pts and staff all said to take from day 1 and the majority of them had not had any ulcers so im going to try that from tonight. (Difflam)
Warmest of hugs to you all
Ps - i also loved tea and chemo made me chuckle and i really identified with the hair loss bits xx
Lighthouse I’m really sorry to hear about your friend. That is very tough for you. Sending hugs.
Mooney are you ok? You’ve been quiet for a while.
Hope everyone’s doing ok. R x
Lighthouse sorry to hear about your friend.
I too have had surgery first, being HER2 + ER+ and PR+ I will have radiotherapy, herceptin and tamoxifen after my chemo. I’m glad to have now completed the fec and am really hoping the awful nausea I’ve had for the majority of the time will be gone.
Thanks for the tea and chemo book recommendation I have a copy coming to me.
I’ve been attending a mindfulness for cancer patients course, it’s an 8 week course and we are now on week 5. It’s very good and I thought I’d attach the folllowiing link that gives some info on it - I’m doing mine in Bristol but it looks like it’s run at some magpies centres and haven centres but it’s Bangor uni that have created it - just for anyone that might be interested really. themindfulnessinitiative.org.uk/professional-networks/interest-areas/10-professional-networks/29-cancer
I’m off to the New Forest for a few days holiday - hoping to have enough energy to enjoy the break away.
Hoping everyone is well and wishing luck to those with treatments this week. X
Thanks esther/robin i feel slightly more ‘up’ today - robin must be so tough to hear of other loss when you have been through so much so pls know it really does touch my heart to have your thoughts/comments. It just so close to home in her 30s, leaving 3 young children her oldest is in my sons year group they are only 9. Tough.
I thought the mindfulness course might be interesting so have just been in touch with my local haven centre. Plan to drop in next week and see what they can offer so ty for recommendation.
Much love to all xx
Lighthouse really sorry to hear about your friend. Glad you are feeling more up today. Mindfulness is good I think. My OH did it last year when he was diagnosed with depression, I also did it with my older son when he was anxious about school. There is a nice app I used called Smiling Mind. Anything where you are forced to take a step back and just breathe is good. We get so busy just rushing from one thing to the next, and now going from one cycle of chemo to another.
Have just done EC3. White cells held up this this time (just!) with the gcsf so it all went off on time. Now home with my enormous plastic bag of medicines and feeling exhausted but will no doubt be awake at 3am because of the steroids. I really do hate those drugs!
Big hugs to all recovering from cycles and doing them this week.
Egg x
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Hiya everyone.
I am now day 6 of Fec 3. Been a long few days, mainly spent just dozing on the sofa and watching the clock tick by. But today starting to feel more like my old self.
Lighthouse I hope you are feeling a bit better. There are so many sad stories in relation to this disease, stay strong and keep believing that you will get through this.
The journey still feels like a long way to go but I make myself look at how far we have all come and we have achieved so much already…getting diagnosed, surgery, rounds of chemo. We are all doing so well.
I will definitely look into the someone like you service as I think it would really help me to speak to someone who has completed this journey.
One last thing, my hair is getting very patchy, can’t decide whether to remain moth eaten or shave it off?! Wig is still in the box, waiting to be worn!
Nicky x
Evening everyone, Sorry I have been absent, had a very difficult FEC 3 and am dreading T so am trying to be normal this last 10 days. I know someone who started T 10 days ago and she has had a dreadful time and it’s scared me. My first T is next Tuesday, I am just trying to block it out and enjoy the week.
I have been keeping up with the posts and I am really sorry about your friend Lighthouse. It always brings you up short makes you think and desperately sad all at the same time.
I am wearing my wig more and it makes me feel more normal as you can see am all about normal at the moment enter. It doesn’t itch quite as much and I feel a cap marks me out a bit more.
I am just sorry as i just feel particularly down at the moment can’t muster up any humour which is why I haven’t posted.
Hope the SE"s are few for those having treatment this week, hope Robin my Chemo buddy and Scotty are OK, thanks for asking after me. Hope you are OK Ali and Stefr neither of you have posted for a while. Lots of love and hugs
Mooneyxx,
Just pleased to hear from you. I’ve found this one much tougher and share your anxiety about T. I’m due to start next Friday. Deep breath and small steps x
Relieved to hear from you Mooney and sorry to hear you’ve had a tough time. Like you I am terrified of first T next week. If it is any comfort I met someone at lgfb workshop who had done T and she said it was fine and easier than fec. So I have heard good and bad about it. We just have to hope for the best. The state my veins are in I’ll be lucky if they give me anything! R x
Mooney Robin Scotty, me too with the T anxiety, I’m due the week after you all I think, plus got Herceptin coming in the mix… My onc is lovely but very candid about likely T SEs.