Hi everyone,
Nicky I thought I might invite the terror over to view your piece on tv!! No I have not erased you, to the contrary I put a blue dot next to it so it can’t be deleted accidentally. If you ever come to Chelmsford, Essex call in and I will show it to you!! A southern meet up would be great but my eyes are really struggling at present. Your appearance really does look good, how do you manage to look so well? Like you I take the steroids as soon as I wake up but had very little sleep over the first 3 days. This did not happen on epi when they were spaced over the day. Although I have 4 on cmf and only had 3 on epi. I blame the unit making me take tablets rather than iv in the unit that time. Will see how I fare next time with piriton as well to knock me out! Starting to get a bit worried about next week. Hope your swelling continues to improve, my ring really hurts but has made a big dent now and I just make sure I can rotate it still. I agree that much as I hate needles, tablets on empty stomachs are right up there with them for a different sort of pain or discomfort. If the computer had given me a different result, I would be on about 6 xeloda tablets each day and really doubt whether my tummy would have coped, even if my hands and feet had been ok. I don’t really understand why it is so different . 5FU becomes xeloda/capecitabine when it is digested but the side effects are so very different.I really hope you have further improvements when they scan you. Hope you are feeling much better and how long does the bone treatment last or does it just continue? You must keep us posted about how you get on with each next step.
My drug cycle is over 28 days now, which is why the second half is longer than the first half. So I have a dose 2 Tuesdays in a row and then get 2 Tuesdays off and then it repeats till end of November almost.The mouth went yesterday so hope to have a good 8 days now. Joanne, so glad it went better this time and don’t change anything for the next. Mine is next week - yuk. Mine will be after chemo, they say so this year. What a lovely Christmas present!! Not! I have the C in a drip and it still gets me, hate it.I now have piriton too to add to the cocktail. Good for you, for rinsing your own line. Have you asked when it will come out? Mine will be after chemo, they say so this year. What a lovely Christmas present! Laughed at the sausages, mine would be huge. Glad the hair is on its way back, mine is like baby hair and totally uncontrollable and too fine to cover my scalp very well. Hope it gets thicker. Lorraine I get mad when it loses my post. If you use the back button, you can usually see your original post, then highlight and copy it,to put on the thread. Nicky advised me to copy posts and I do if it is playing up or very long. Drives me bonkers! We are all ok except my hubby has just started reacting to losing his Mum, well just saying comments really. It is obvious he had put it all on hold to get through the day, he keeps going to bed really early to sleep through it. Thank you, we definitely do focus on the happy memories. I liked the present explanation and will think of you splashing in puddles when it rains, which will be quite often! Where did the summer go or did I blink and miss it? Still going into Autumn means I am creeping closer to the end of chemo so not disappointed if days go fast this year while at home.Keep us posted how you get on, won’t you. Joanne all those mountains!!! Shame there is not one near me or I would have put you up for a few days to recover afterwards. You are going to have to go into training first to build up your stamina or are you banking on strapping young men to come and carry you down if you get worn out? Could be fun!!! Seriously though it is an amazing thing to think of doing and hope you get to complete your dream. Angie hope you are going to be well enough to have a good week before you know what again. Is it the last one?? Oooh it is a bit like being lapped and having to keep going till the end for Julia, Joanne and I.Kirsty I think you are going along with us for some time too aren’t you? Bevy hope the beastly bug is getting under control so you can have some well desrved rest. Lisa how are you? Have you shaken off the last one yet? Is your hair growing yet? I want to know what you have in store for ratty? Sorry if I forgot anyone.
Hugs all round, especially if something big is on this week. I am eating and shopping all week if I get my way!
Lily x x
.
Hi everyone
Lorraine - good to hear from you and, as Lily says, loads of puddles for you to splash in when you get some wellies - maybe you’ll be going to some festivals next year and hanging out with the cool young ones if you get the hang of mud etc! Yes, I’m in the same boat as you with bone secondaries. I still get an ache at times but this can also mean the drugs are healing the area - I hope! I’m due some scans before I see my onc at the beginning of October when we’ll see what FEC and my bone strengtheners have done so far. I’ll then go on to a hormone therapy and continue with the bone stuff, all of which is still meant to shrink and strengthen the relative areas. I agree with enjoying the present - it’s the only way forward - and do like appreciating the seemingly insignificant things in life which I probably overlooked pre BC. Take care and keep us up to date if you ever get to see your elusive onc!
Joanne - thanks for the info on hair dyes, I’m sure I’ll need something whenever the H decides to return - can’t be too grey now I have my TV image to keep up 
And how amazing to be setting a target of climbing all those mountains, good for you. Maybe you can represent the May Chemo Girls and we can sponsor you? I’d obviously join you in doing this challenge but really feel you should go for it on your own
Lily - Thanks for keeping my appearance - I’ll have to take you up on your offer of seeing it - Chelmsford’s not that far away, however I will wear a disguise as the TTT (Tank Top Terror) may be on the prowl! I seem to have done ‘OK’ on chemo by luck alone, believe me I have not felt well on it but do seem to bounce back after day 5/6. I’m usually feeling so much better after steroids, chemo, anti sickness pills are out of my system so by the time they filmed me I was feeling pretty good. Also I think having thick eyelashes (and eyebrows!) before helped because, although they’ve thinned there was enough of them to hang on in there and give me some features to play with. I really was dreading losing those bits of hair more than anywhere else and luckily didn’t have to resort to eyebrow wigs/stick-ons as discussed many moons ago! I’m keeping an eye on my pudgy hand, I’m sure it’s a reaction to poor veins and swelling after. yesterday it seemed much better, today I’m not so sure but will see how we get on and keep moving the ring around so I know it’s not too tight. Hope OH doesn’t find things too tough at the moment, it must be so difficult for him to lose his Mum and then see you go through all this cr@p so it’s not surprising if he’s reacting now the funeral is over. They are terrible at letting their feelings out though aren’t they? My OH always says there’s nothing wrong when I KNOW there is, bottling it up doesn’t help but for some reason men don’t like to let it all out so I hope he finds a way of coping/ranting/grieving. Plus I expect you are still upset as well which can’t help on top of everything else you’re dealing with at the moment - make sure you take care of yourselves.
To Lisa, Bev, Angie, Kirsty, Julia and anyone else on this huge thread I’ve forgotten - I hope you are all OK and life isn’t too bad.
Take care all
Nicky xx
ps - Am I the only one that has been glad of such a dismal summer? I really couldn’t have dealt with a heat wave or even hot weather and chemo at the same time. It’s been so nice to say to people, when they complain, that it’s been quite nice actually!
Hi All Again
What a wonderful way to start my day I open my laptop when I have my first cup of tea and this thread is the first thing I read.
Lily you sound as if your struggling a bit there hopefully not to bad i’m at the same stage as you on Tact 2 but your the day before me I finish my chemo nov 19th and you on 18th and my 50th birthdays on the 15th so what a celebration only thing is is that it falls on the sat between CMF i hope they get it right by then lol. As for the big strapping Men is there such as thing now a days but oooooo what a thought mmmmmmmm. I’m hoping my 4 sons will join me as I’m gonna need lot of thing to carry with me so they can do one son per mountain lol wonder what wimpy one will take the irish one lol
Nicky
This summer has been a wash out but I like to look at it as if it were a fantastic summer we would have missed most of and I dont know about you but I feel bad enough without listening to everyone having fun outside while I’m lying here feeling sorry for myself lets hope next year is glorious except the days I’m hauling my ass up a hill lol
Joanne
Cern turned on the collider half an hour ago… the world didn’t end but it looks like maybe those clouds went down a black hole…
Gotta go stomp in my new boots. back later…
Angie
hiya all
Up and about yesterday, usually I dont sleep much but been getting 12-15hrs - yawn! Back inwork today and feeling much mroe with it so will log on later and catch up on all the goss!!! Hair growing, oh what to do with ratty!!!
xxx
Hi Lisa
Maybe you need to search out a retirement home for ratty? Just like the donkey sanctuaries He (she?) has served you well so try and be kind. Possibly ‘adopt-a-rat’ scheme so people without their own rats can be a caring owner of one - give it some thought!
Nicky xx
hi everyone
lily 2000
hope youve had a reasonable day, ive been around the shops had to buy some new tops ,(others flashed me boobs too much) now im all prim and proper round necks to hide me scar. oh the joys of cancer. aghhhhhhhhhhhhh! never mind not to feel sorry for myself, at least i can hide my scar below clothes some have it on their face or other areas you cant hide. so as they say count our blessings.
its so understandable about hubby, they do seem to cope with it all by going into their cave, (natural really) but at least he knows he can talk if he wants to. and maybe its best just to focus on what needs to be got through that day, its normally enough for any of us to cope with at the moment.
anyway take care and keep sharing lots of love and hugs x
Nicky 08
im interested to know exactly what treatment youve had, would you remind me, then i can compare notes. i had lumpectomy, mascetomy, 6 fec. was diagnosed this february ( hope you dont mind me asking)
not got me wellies yet, just managing with me walking boots, hubby reckons i’ll break my ankle walking in my wellies ( vote of confidence that is!)
well the world never came to an end today, i didnt do any preparation for it anyway. just got up and mosied around as usual. no last minute loving or anything like that.
DID ANYONE DO ANYTHING UNUSUAL IN CASE THE WORLD COME TO AN END. CANT WAIT TO HEAR
take care everyone BIG HUG!
Hi all,
feelilng so much better today and actually drove for the first time in 12 weeks!! couldn’t before as the arm as too stiff thankfully it has just started to improve over the last few days so much better to have some independence back, I had a really nice thing happen today too the young lady who takes a pilates class I use to go to phoned and offered to give me a half hour class I hesitated at first but decided to go for it and felt so much better for doing something normal (don’t worry I am not doing a Trisha!!) and then the other positive thing that happened I have a contact in america who works at a breast cancer clinic and she has contacted me to say she is attending a national conference on the 10th Oct and will pick up info for me so if there is anything helpful to any of you I will report back.
lisa look after ratty! at least you have some to worry about.
Angie happy stomping!
Hi Nicky, Joanne, Lorraine yesterday is history tomorrow is mystery and yes today is the present so as you say treat it as such.
Lily sorry to hear your O/H is finding life so difficult it is too much to cope with losing his mum and trying to remain strong for you no wonder he needs the peace sleep offers time will help him and as my deal old mum always says “take one day at a time” and “you have been dealt your hand of cards you can’t alter them but you can keep shuffling the deck”
love to you all
Bev x
Hi everyone,
Well after 18 years of living with the most diabolical wallpaper and carpet in the universe in my hall, landing and stairs, the decorator arrived yesterday!!! I did kiss him, don’t worry it is someone I know but have been keen to get it started since June. The previous owners, who were both almost blind had selected a bright red carpet with large patterns on, the carpet man said it was expensive and only usually seen in pubs as the pattern is so big! This was combined with bright blue wallpaper with huge grey patterns all over, together giving the overall effect of chaos. When we bought it, we both said, the first thing we will do is get rid of that. So after 18 years he got the ultimatum, do it or I get someone else. The wallpaper is gone and a sea of white undercoat everywhere is like opening the curtains to see snow everywhere, bliss. I don’t even mind the headache the paint is giving me! The dog of course has walked past it and now has white highlights. I have decided on duck egg blue but every time we buy a matchpot. it looks different in our house. Leaving it to him now.
Had a crisis today when my cover the ‘not so bald bit’ large hairband started falling apart, an emergenncy dash to H & M sorted that out. Never thought I would be so reliant on a hairband!!! My hair is growing like weeds everywhere, but it is growing really fast on my head - hooray, although it is still baby fluff and waves about madly. How are you all getting on in the hair stakes? I read on a thread that dex and piriton knock you right out, so looks like a big sleep for me from now on. I hope they can wake me up as if I take one syndol tablet I am virtually unconcious for 3 hours or more and after surgery I got stuck in recovery for hours because they could not wake me up enough from the morphine. Anyone else had it?
Nicky my wedding ring is really tight again today. I read that the cyclophosphamide causes water retention, so hopefully your balance will return soon and improve. Wouldn’ t it be fab if we all lost half a stone in fluid at th end!!! Reminds me of when I got severe pre eclampsia with my first baby and weed for England and the world for the next few days. I could have won gold in the Olympic weeing ! Hubby is ok, just randomly comes out with comments. Maybe it is upsetting that we have moved on too well. He has 2 days off so we can go out on our own so might help him relax and chance to talk if he wants. Probably going to Audley End and Saffron Walden some time. Hope to manouvre him into a carpet shop too as the spikes on the stairs (that chemo brain cannot remember what they are called!) are lethal. I keep forgetting words and it is driving me bonkers, if not already there! Any time you are this way, fab to see any of you. Would you need a red carpet entrance? I could get tank top to come and suck your neck!!! JOanne I agree I so love all you guys on here and reading the posts, except when things go pear shaped. Still a trouble shared … that is my saying as you have all gone off into old sayings. You sound really happy, good for you. Hope your sons will do their bit and carry your backpack up the mountains. I personally would take the train up Snowdon!! Glorious next year, I hope so. Well I hope to be able to go abroad and find some sun and a sunbed and just hang out, nothing too energetic except eating. Angie - that is where the real black hole worry is coming from, us all munching the world’s resources!!! Hope you enjoy all the news on this.
Lisa, glad to hear you are on the up. My daughter found my scarf collection (loads) from when I bought every useful head gear I found and is in raptures at how many I have - to wear round her neck. She is now borrowing them. I am so out of thinking about how I look that it had not even occurred to me that I could use them and be fashionable. LOL . It made me think about my wigs and being a bit superstitious, they are all going in a box in the loft. I always take an umbrella so I won’t need one. You could let your dog have a wrestle with it! How long is your hair now? Hi Lorraine love your laid back posts, keep me nice and calm.Being on 5FU I did not remember the world might end and went shopping, but that would still be a fitting thing to be doing, don’t you think? Also at least the hall would have been partly done!! Thank you for your kind thoughts. Bevy fab news that you are back behind the wheel. So am I, I love driving around and it really annoys me to see my car in the drive when my eyes are blurry, so I can’t go out. Pilates sounds good as it is nice and gentle and will be all ears about the conference.
Anyone in this week? I can’t keep track now I am on 28 day cycles.
Lily x
Hi Lorraine
As Lily said, you sound so laid back, that’s great and I guess all the chemo and other stuff we deal with was really getting to you? I still love your sign on name - wish I’d thought of something like that, maybe I’ll morph myself into someone else - that’d confuse all of you!
I don’t mind at all you asking what my treatments have been, also anyone else on here as I think we understand each other just a tad now! However I don’t want to scare anyone so look away now if you don’t want to know the results!
I was dx in 2003, grade 2, 17mm tumour, ER and PR+ (didn’t test for HER2 then). Had lumpectomy, 5 nodes removed (all clear) then 6 weeks of rads. Also on Tamoxifen and had Zoladex for 2 years to make me post menopausal. No chemo as it would add ‘only’ 2% and was felt to have more risks than benefits. This, I must admit, has troubled me but I have read on other posts of women in the same position now who did have chemo so I’m not going onto the ‘what ifs’ bit. Everything was fine until a routine mammogram picked up an recurrence earlier this year. All ready for mastectomy etc but scans beforehand showed up the area on my hip, there’s also a ‘possible’ area on my spine but this is inconclusive as the CT showed it but not the bone scan. So - that’s where the chemo comes in. It’s job, plus 3 weekly Pamidronate, has been to shrink the breast lump (they won’t operate now unless necessary) and repair/heal the bone mets. I’m now getting scanned again to see where we’re at after chemo and move on to hormone therapy. I’ll go onto Letrozole (as Tam stopped working for me) but need to be post menopausal so I’m also being (blood) tested in a couple of weeks to see what’s going on in the ovary department! I’ll continue with Pam but now have it 4 weekly. Phew! From what I’ve read on your posts I’m not sure if you are getting any biphosphonates yet? I’m sure they will give them to you if not as they do seem to be the usual treatment for bone mets. Also it will depend on whether you are Er/PR + and HER2+ as to what you go onto next. (I’ve now been tested for HER2 and am -ve) I’m quite happy to compare notes and obviously keep in touch - maybe we can PM or start a secondaries thread to keep in touch? Also, depending how close we live to each other we could meet up as we do seem to have similar problems (understatement!)?
Having both finished FEC - how are things going for you? What’s the Hair situation like? You’re a week or 2 ahead of me so you’re still my guinea pig (as Obama would say - with lipstick on - ha ha) Let me know what wonders are install for me in the coming weeks!
Take care, you sound like you’re in a good place at the moment
Nicky x
Hi to all - agree with Joanne by the way about enjoying logging on and catching up!
Lorraine - apart from the above post, other matters of deep concern - Yes, I went shopping as well! When the going gets tough the tough go shopping! Only managed a short trip but, hey, I need to build up my strength! Having decided to put away all my summer clothes, that did not get used AT ALL this year, I have now gone into Autumn/Winter mode and started looking at the warmer clothes. However I am proceeding with caution as, having had 1 menopause already, I know I could be in for a flushing good year, so short sleeves will be a key feature this season! I do love this time of the year and my 2 lovely girls have opposite to SAD - they can’t wait for the dark nights and positively cheer up round about now! OH and I usually walk down to our local on a Sunday afternoon and meet friends. It totally destroys anything we want/need to do on a Sunday but it’s such a great way to spend a dull winter’s afternoon. During the summer a lot of people (except us of course) are away so we don’t get down there so often, plus the chemo weeks were a miss, so this time of the year will be really good to look forward to. Wellies will also be a fashion essential as the walk is by a lovely river - muddy at the best of times!
Bev - so glad you’re mobile again, it’s something we really miss when we can’t get out and about by ourselves isn’t it? Hopefully things will continue to improve so the lack of movement in your arm becomes a thing of the past. Pilates sounds like a great thing to get back into. I was a member of our local gym before this dx but cancelled my membership when chemo started. I don’t think I’ll go back as I only really enjoyed one particular class there and prefer being outside now such as walking, cycling etc. However I do fancy yoga, pilates or maybe go back to Tai Chi, which I did years ago, altogether a more soothing and healing routine.
Lily - I’m a bit worried about your post. Why are you going to throw hubby out? (to quote ‘do it or I’ll get someone else’) Bit tough I think but guess you’ve got to keep them on their toes! Ahh decorating, something I hope to get round to now. Our old house was a decorating nightmare and, as I do it all, I was well and truly fed up with it. All rooms needed doing as they weren’t to our taste but getting rid of wood chip and vinyl wallpaper was terrible and every room took twice as long as I thought. Plus all the woodwork needed doing and ceilings. Never got round to finishing it all before we moved to a brand new house which has stayed as it was for the last 3 years. Now need a bit of colour but luckily it should be easy and quick to do as there’s hardly any preparation needed - bliss! Duck egg blue is such a soothing colour and hope to use it in our bedroom when my energies fully return. What a change from what you had before. But hang on to the red carpet - you know I’ll need it (being an A list celeb) when I visit!
You are a mine of information about chemo drugs by the way. Interesting about the ‘C’. My hand is still up and I may phone the unit to ask if I need to do anything. I’ve got a stash of diuretics (I had water retention a few years back when I started Tamoxifen) so could resort to one of those if they think I should. By the way I also had severe pre-eclampsia with my 1st daughter so know what fluid retention looks like! I lost about half to 1 stone of my pregnancy weight in a week due to peeing for England! As you say, wouldn’t it be great to lose any weight gain by pee alone - unfortunately I think it may involve climbing 4 mountains like Joanne!
Hope you get to have a couple of days away with OH - I expect you both need it. When OH and I went away it was lovely to get away from the humdrum-ness of home life especially in the middle of chemo, it felt really good to be somewhere different - even if it was only Eastbourne
Angie - hope you are doing OK - you sounded down on your other post about chemo. The finishing post is in sight so keep going and you’ll be out the other side in no time at all. Let us know (if it’s printable!) how you are going to celebrate the last one - you hinted at it a while ago, very intrigued!
To everyone I’ve not mentioned, and to all I have, take care at least we’re all still here after yesterdays ‘experiment’!
Nicky xx
Hi All: I think it has taken me nearly an hour to read all the posts since I was last on here! Thank goodness it’s on the office system!
I’ll try to pick up what you have all said - I have been scribbling notes like crazy.
Lily - yes I did check the Vit B thingy and didn’t take it. Got chem brain - keep reading rubbishy books and can’t even follow the pathetic plot. Interesting about the 5FU turning into xeloda/capecitabine once digested. I wish they would give you more information about what all this stuff REALLY does to you. Hopefully the brain will return to normal useless level after the end of this lot.
My hair is starting to come back, just baby fluff on head - my hairdresser says I should get it taken off as it will encourage real hair, but not going to do that yet, have small patches of hairs on my arms and shins, but nothing to shout about.
Before the hair went, I used a Ladyshaver to do my underarms including where the scar is from the node removal (24 gone, one cancerous).
Angie: yes my shoulder is sort of numb but gets funny feeling when touched. Had salt scrub, massage and moisturing wrap on Tuesday - pure heaven - and I could feel her touching but not the same as on the rest of me. I don’t have any trouble with wearing underwired bras any more cos I hated the baggy old lady ones.
I also got p***ed off with not getting any advice on diet - just told to eat healthily. not overindulge the alcohol and get on with it. I asked about things to improve immune system and was told there wasn’t anything! How helpful is that. I will start doing more research as I did some to start with and, since I have been v. lucky and not been ill - have just carried on as normal.
Will check out the cancer books too, but sometimes you can read too much.
However, went to hairdresser yesterday to get the wig recut (no it hadn’t grown!) and read a piece in magazine about lovely girl with bladder cancer - horrific. She ended up with stoma bag and when her bloke saw it (Dennis Waterman, the actor) he said “Blimey, it will be a hell of a job getting shoes to match that!” So we are not the only group that laughs at this horrible disease.
I too am glad we have had yukky summer, I don’t think I could have stood the heat. Also, having had one menopause about 8 years ago, I don’t want another chemically induced one either. WiIl have heavy conversation with onc about that, but that is a way down the line.
Next week, Lily, Joanne, we will be on no 6, only 7 and 8 to go and then it will be Christmas - saw the first tree complete with lights yesterday!!!
Will sign off now - better do some work. Everyone keep well, keep laughing, and will be back on next week after part one of No 6.
Julia
XXXXXXXXX
Hi Ladies
Sorry ladies but i need to winge:-(
I am nearly back to normality after the last five days being bed ridden. The Tax is really made me feel like cr@p… even typing this is hurting my fingers!!! Found it really hard to walk because the bones in my legs where so painful. My toungue as turned white, cracked and bleeding and my gums are full of uclers. Living on soup at the moment.Sickness and runny bum doesn’t help. Will be asking them to reduce the dosage next time round. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it feels better to have a winge.
With it being my First Tax cycle are these symptoms normal??
We have the police coming tonight…honest i haven’t been in trouble?? My youngest son 13 went out with is mates last night. He was playing on the back fields and 2 boys decided for a laugh to attack him. They punched him several times and threatened him with some golf clubs. He came home really upset. I am sooooooooo angry, that thugs can think they can go round doing this type of things. I have reported it, because i would not forgive myself if they went on and did attack someone else. My son knows one of the boys, which helps with the statement. Hopefully they will be warned and their parents will also take heed.
I have now had a good winge and feel good to get things off my chest.
Hope everyone else is okay and ((((((HUGS))))))) to those who need them xxx
Kirsty xx
Hi all
Anyone feel like a theve swollowed a bowling ball my daughter in law is 6 months pregnant and I look further on than her even starting wearing maternity wear lol.
Julia - I have just had no 6 and 6 to go so iam half way there
Joanne
hi everyone
lily 2000
great to hear you having some decorating done, i think it really cheers you up, specially if some one else is doing it., and waiting 18 years you deserve a medal. but saying that all the horrible gaudy colours and bold prints are supposed to be coming back,( not in this house they wont.) i too would like some decorating done, but funds are low, and hubbys lazy. (i normally do it like nicky or get someone in) i just love watching 60 minute make over dont you. glad to hear you and hubby going to spend some quality time together. (you need it more than ever) i bet its difficult when you have little tufts of hair growing back, i should imagine a wig would be unbarable as they are so hot normally.
nicky 08
hi nicky, youve been through the mill a bit aint you? but we all know in our hearts this can return at anytime, so i guess we just get on with things. at least you remember everything they tell you, i find i dont retain information very good. it sounds good them being able to zap the return in your breast without another op. im puzzled how it spread to your bones though, because i thought it spread through your lymph nodes and yours were ok. i guess theres so much we dont understand about this, maybe its better that way, leave it up to the experts i say. i havnt had anything for my bones yet, but will have in future. i dont know where i am on the hormone front,no periods for the last few months (not sure if its temporary) my secondaries are in my shoulders ribs and cant remember where else. anyway enough of cancer, (bet you get as sick as me, thinking about it, best to forget it sometimes.
Shopping when the world might be coming to an end, could have gone mad on the old plastic, (good job you didnt hey!) unless you did, then you know what to tell the other half, seriously WHAT WOULD WE REALLY DO, IF WE KNEW THE WORLD WAS COMING TO AN END.
Definatly not get ready for work, not bother with housework, eat what we liked, tell our loved ones how much we love them,
ANY MORE IDEAS?
Take care of yourselves everyone, be good girls, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh thats so funny x
Sorry for the absence… chaotic here. Just explained on my getting bored thread…no time for boredom anymore 
Had a chat with my Mum earlier which made me feel better too, planning the recovery from chemo, got a couple more books out the library…
Coping with Radiotherapy (take a guess why I got that one out LOL)
Patrick Holfords 9 day liver detox
Got that one to try and clean out the liver between chemo and rads.
Now listening to music again… there was a thread about pets earlier which made me realise how much I miss my recording studio pussy cat and seeing melissa etheridge on youtube talking how chemo is hell made me realise just what sterner stuff we’re all made off.
As the song I’m listening to right now says.
I feel I’m going down, 10 feet belore the ground… it’s just the way I’m feeling,
Wow so appropriate actually… Feeder. Just the way I’m feeling.
Lots of love to you all. I hope you can all feel a little of the hope I feel right now… there’s reason to you know. Even those of you fighting of the little buggers in your bones. There’s always hope… always.
Lots of love to you all
Angie
Hi,
hey we are all over the place right now aren’t we? I am determined to be jolly right up to the moment I go to bed next Monday (chemo on Tues) before waking up to my hubby with freezing cold hands trying to squirt numbing cream on my port! He gets in a right panic trying to get the dressing straight for some reason and also in case we are late!! LOL they keep me waiting so I don’t care. I like to just stay in bed till the last possible moment and if I am really mean, shout ‘I’m not going’ to him, which he hates!! Just my little moment of pretending I am in control! LOL. Then just walk in there and take it! A little concerned about having piriton added too, so we thought we would arrive early and have a big fry up breakfast in the canteen to coat my stomach. The fried bread last time was yum as I am too lazy to make it myself at home. The decorating is going well but the house stinks and the dog is painted too. Still I have one blue wall, had to tone down to a lighter shade as it tends to be dark, but pleased so far. Now I have to get him into a carpet shop to get rid of the red carpet.
Nicky I laughed at what you said!! I meant it was either he decorated or I got someone else to do the work!! We have different opinions, but have never had a bust up in 28 years. He just hates anyone else doing work as it is never good enough but prefers the garden so never gets round to it himself. My hand is still fat but feet a bit better. Someone reminded me to reduce my salt content and realised I am eating very salty things on CMF, so weird that sweet things are not yummy at the moment, even cringe at the thought of a bowl of ice cream and then can eat it a week later. Weird. We went to look round an English Heritage house today, which was interesting but my feet really killed me. Then realised I had not looked at my petrol gauge for ‘I don’t remember how long’ and discovered that sleepy little villages in the country don’t stock 97 petrol and was very very low before we got to a bigger garage.I have also forgotten to put my hand brake on five times!! I know it is this rotten 5FU, anyone else doing things like this? Might write a list of instructions how to start the car before the whole brain turns to jelly and I forget! Interesting you had SPA too. Did you know that if your Mother had it when expecting you, you have a higher chance of not getting BC as it is more likely in well fed big babies and they were not due to our illness. I only told my oldest daughter as it applies to her. Your story touched me, so much has changed in a few years and helps me to battle through chemo, as my initial dx was similar but a bigger tumour. My boss has not been offered chemo for almost the same dx as me and I worry as she is younger. She is in another hospital district, which is not a centre of excellence like mine. She thinks she is lucky. I just don’t say anything, how would it help and anyway what do I know. I have everything crossed for you and Lorraine who have mets to worry about on top of everything else. Ypur positive outlooks will be doing their bit too.
Julia as you will have read I feel like I am losing the plot as I cannot remember things and it makes me feel stupid. Hope it comes back quickly!! I would be too scared to have my baby hair cut off. I am going to wait until it has covered a bit more then get a pixie cut if there is enough hair. If not I will keep going with the hairbands, I have not worn a wig as the cold cap saved enough hair, well just about . I shouldn’t read up about 5FU it is not reassuring, this is the one the papers all wrote about earlier in the year for causing chemo brain. Are we ready for the two 6s next week? I could get really cheesed off if I think about having 6 more, when most people only get 6 in total. Anyone else wondering why they picked the trial? Mind you the onc reckons the big dose of epi will have done it already and with the CMF we are just picking up % to add to it, hope he is right. I think a lot of the treatments are more similar than we think as Angie, from memory is having loads of epi too. I am sure all our oncs have deliberated on our cases and done their best for our individual situations. Loved the Dennis joke. I would say something like that, but only about myself. Kirsty so sorry to hear about your son and good for taking action to stop it, most parents just don’t realise. The side effects sound horrible. I know tax has a reputation for bone and joint pain in some people, just hoped it would not be you. Look up some posts as many people talk about getting better painkillers. The main thing is getting it over and done with to give you the best chance.I went through a bad time with epi and struggled to keep going for a while but afterwards was glad that I had stuck with it. I kept telling myself it must be knocking the little cs for six if it did that to me. Ask for help, I had steroids for my tongue which are yuk but heal it fast. Ask for iglu for the ulcers, better anti sickness tablets and immodium for the other end. They should be able to help you reduce some of these. Poor you, hope it is starting to improve now. Joanne yes I have a 2 part bowling system, one above the tummy button and one below! I keep imagining liposuction taking it away but after this could not imagine ever having anything done that was not essential. Luckily OH has a similar, possibly larger one, so we match! I also dream of a house make-over Lorraine. I love seeing the house improve as it is scruffy in places, we just ran out of steam and then bits we did got wrecked with 4 kids running around. Our funds drop very soon so this is a last chance to talk him into it. It really was awful! I am trying to also talk him into rescuing a dog. If he sees one he will say yes straight away as he is a softy but getting him there is the tricky bit! Hi Angie I am reading a lot too. The strangest being the book on the ‘outer margins’ and finding it was not on what I had imagined the outer margins were. It is lots of different stories, started off on historic parts, ladies from decades ago describing their BC. The latest section starts with the woman going to see a play about gay and bisexual HIV. I have to say dealing with HIV issues and BC seems ? I can’t think of a word bad enough myself but the heroine?? just wants sex all the time to make her feel better before chemo, but her female partner doesn’t like her scars. I have to say I can’;t decide whether to laugh or cry at her predicament from the way she writes it, but had thought another woman would only be more understanding. What do I know? Then I go back to the Susan Love breast book, giving stats that scare me sometimes and wonder. We need to write a good book. Anyone feel like writing? I am going to write something but not sure what. Angie I am bouncing right now too, right up to Monday night, no Tuesday morning after my big breakfast. Keep believing.
Anyone who is not Tiggerlike, hope you feel better soon
Lily x x
Hi Girls,
Kirsty you poor thing as if you haven’t got enough to cope with there are some really unpleasant young people about and good on you and your son in trying to stop them I hope the Police do their job.
Lily as always loved reading your post about life in the lily household! Good luck for next week! I have my 4th FEC on wednesday and like you I hate getting out of bed that day and also shout “I’m not going!” but I still do.
Strangely after my upbeat day of Tuesday being out and about and feeling physicaly so much better I had a terrible day yesterday crying all day just lost it completely.
I guess this will happen from time to time but I didn’t expect it on what was supposed to be my good week ha ha as if.
Still hopefully the weekend will be better as the weather is supposed to improve! so wishing you all a comfortable weekend.
love to you all Bev x
Hi All: Kirsty sorry to hear about your son, hope he is OK and has no more hassle and the police do their thing. There really are some horrible people out there who don’t give a whatsit about how they behave and what they do to nice kids just minding their own business.
Lily: I know what you mean about too much information, but what I need to find out from my onc is how much all these treatments are improving my survival rate. Bearing in mind how early my cancer was caught, one small lump (OK grade 3) 24 nodes gone - only one cancerous, can’t understand why my survival after ALL THE TREATMENT is 67% for ten years. I want to know how much each bit improves the percentage - rads? Tamoxifen or Arimidex? Herceptin? Think I had better had triple appoinment with the Prof next time so I can get some answers. 5FU really is the pits - my OH had a real go at my Prof about the side effects - the answer was “it has been used for a long time and so far we have not had any problems”. Can’t think they have used it long enough to find out. No doubt Angie with all her scientific knowledge may have an answer to that!!
Yes I’m ready for Part 1 of 6 next week, will have to have early blood test on Monday as have friends coming to lunch that day. It seems to have gone quite quickly since the start, but I guess that is because (SO FAR) I have had no problems unlike you and so many others. I still think that the horrids will catch up with me some time!!!
Angie: Interesting about the books, are we supposed to do the detox thingy or are you just going to do it anyway? Whenever you ask about things like that you get told not to.
Joanne: Sorry thought you were on the same timetable as Lily and me, hope you are OK after no 6.
Nicky, Bevy: keep you chin up and get through the next few days.
Well, despite the forecast for a good day, it is raining here in Leamington Spa just in time for me to go to Sainsburys.Oh Joy!!
Let’s hope it improves for the weekend.
Julia
XXXXXX
hi everyone
hope everyone is keeping their chin up! we all try are best, difficult at times. i too am reading plenty at the moment mainly life stories, one was wrote by a man whos wife had breast cancer, was interesting to know how our hubbys feel, cause they dont often say. i can always tell when my hubby is worried though he raises his voice and gets angry over little things. i take no notice cos i know thats his way now.
Lily 2000
glad decoratings going well, i too need so many jobs doing after 22 years in our house. i managed to do bathroom before cancer arrived, but still waiting for carpet after about a year. sometimes you just cant be bothered to finish things off. i did spot paint some marks in sons room last week. he has no headboard so it was grubby at the back of his bed. i felt better for doing a little bit.
ive been invaded lately by big hairy monsters (the ones with six legs that is). i try not to kill them, and remove them with a glass, but one was in bedroom the other day, and i had to kill him, cos i cant sleep if i know ones in the bedroom. felt so guilty. it must be the rain bringing them in. cant even get hubby to rescue me, cos hes more scared than me. hope you have a good weekend. try to relax. and have fun
Nicky 08
hope you feeling well nicky. do you spend much time at home, or are you always out and about like me? i just do the very basic housework and then clear of out, seems to be my way of coping. it would be great to meet up sometime, but i think we live in different areas, i am in Staffordshire. maybe sometime we’ll all meet up at a central point. that would be good. have a good weekend. enjoy yourself. x