Well…and especially for standingstill…I can report that the vit E capsules are amazing when used appropriately!!! Also SS please please go and get some help as to be in your 40s with potentially another 40+ years to live like that is totally unacceptable…we will back you up in spirit if not in person.
I also have taken penecillin V for prophlactic reasons as I have no spleen so am open to infections and can report its good at fending off all sorts of stuff!
… forgot to say, you can get VitE oil in a bottle (not capsules) from H&B, high street health food store…
just going back to the fishnet items… OH brought one in amsterdam a few years back… he was in the amsterdam “spirit” and i was outside the shop with my chips… well now i need to get out my needle and thread cos i only need one hole on the chest… unless anyone here would like to borrow it until i get my recon?
Seriously this thread has given me so much to bare in mind and very good questions to raise. Thank you x
Fascinating feedback from everyone and thanks to LiF for raising this topic. But the biggest question still there for me is why don’t we get more info or advice on what to do to help with these problems? It seems that we all get told “well of course you’ll get hot flushes, night sweats and a dry vagina” but the only help offered is some lubrication so that our men can still “get what they want”, but we’re not expected to want a love life, so it shouldn’t matter to us. I thought that attitude had died out 30 or 40 years ago, but it appears not!
Like most of the others who’ve posted here, my love life with my OH is very important to me, it’s part of the glue that holds us together, and if something is damaging it I want to know what I can do to put it right.
Sarah x
That it Sarah…there is NO information on what to do or where to get proper help…perhaps the mods on here could pass this info on to BCC…and they could actually talk to real women about this as its so very important. I know the section for younger women…i.e those diagnosed under 40ish discuss this and put forward solutions, however those of us over 40 are still amazingly brushed under the carpet…because of course older people just don’t ‘do it’
The fact that older women are almost topping the std stats along with teens prove that ‘yes they do’!!!
So come on BCC…we need your advocacy…what d’ya think???
Hi LiF
That comment of yours about the over 40s particularly struck a chord with me because I’m convinced that a significant cause for us not being offered any practical advice is that the medical professionals believe that “old people” don’t (or shouldn’t) “do it”! Typical arrogance of the younger ones, who think we’re all old fossils! I’m over 50 and I’m damned if I’m going to have my love life relegated to the “doesn’t matter” file! And how on earth do the over 60s get treated by the medical people? I dread to think what response they get!
Sarah x
Has anyone found anything that helps with the dreadful night flushes? I’ve got a chillo pillow and am taking sage capsules on the advice of one of the more enlightened medics. I am confined to the spare bedroom as I am near combustible in terms of heat and feel like I’m swimming with the perspiration. I’m even heating the chillo up! I’m sort of getting my mojo back post chemo but sharing a bed is out of the question at the moment! Lou x
LOL! Well my OH is like a walking radiator so under a duvet he positively glows…so since I don’t suffer like you but do get the hot then cold then hot problem I find sleeping under cotton…not polyester or any other man made fibres helps enormously. I sleep in my birthday suit, always have done and that helps or I know if I’m cold and go and find something a simple loose 100% cotton teeshirt is good. Also banish any form of heating in bedrooms and open a window a crack even in really cold weather, and wide open if warm…works for us!
I’ve “reported” this thread to bring it to the attention of BCC mods, in case they hadn’t spotted it, so with luck and a following wind we may get some input from the lovely BCC people. It’s such an important part of our existence, if our sex lives go out the window it’s no wonder so many BC sufferers get depressed!
Hi all!
I totally agree with all BC treatments’ effects in that “department” ! I’ve had something like a quadruple “whammy” on my libido in the last 11 years - firstly - started effexor in 2000 - for delayed post-natal stress and anxiety (anti-dep., also known as “No-sex-or” among Drs, apparently!). BC treatment and tamoxifen in 2008. Hysterectomy following prolapse - 2009. Chemo again - 2010. Rads to only bit left - ovaries - late 2010. Then, to cap it all - femara started Feb 2011 as I’m now menopausal. What sex life? - absolutely zilch! There was a woman on the US site who started taking Viagra after libido-loss, but I’m not sure about it. Hope things improve!?
All the best, Sarahx
I’ve just been wandering around (wouldn’t call it as focussed as “browsing”) and came across this.
oncolink.org/coping/article.cfm?c=4&s=42&ss=90&id=470
Quite an old piece but might be worth a read.
re hot flashes, this is so useful (not!) suggestion number 1 is my favourite: breastcancer.about.com/od/lifeduringtreatment/tp/hot_flashes.htm
Hi not sure if any of you have seen this one :
Rhian x
CM
Thanks for that link it made fascinating reading and had me near to tears. Although it was quite an old article it seems that sadly nothing has changed.
Nottsgal
Loved the suggestion of standing in a swimming pool - now where do I find the one on my floor at work?
Sarah x
Nottsgal, No. 10 in the top tips also mentions Prozac, which of course is to be avoided if on Tamoxifen because of interactions. Who on earth wrote those tips?!
Yeh, just wondering could we write a guide, like the confident choice one about prosthesis and bras, but on sex, for hetties, lesbians, DIY etc…what do you think BCC?
Nicola
great idea nicola, there have been guides on going through chemo, etc etc why not sex , this thread proves there is the ‘will’ to be sexually active after BC and its treatments.
rx
Following on from CM’s comment about Prozac, the other thing to be aware of with anti-depressants are that they have a numbing effect on the nerves. So if you’ve been prescribed a-d’s to help deal with the hot flushes and night sweats, they can also have the unwanted side effect of numbing bits you don’t want numbed. When I asked my GP about this she confirmed that that’s the way these drugs work and they will all have that effect to some extent. I had been taking amitriptyline but came off it for that reason - orgasm became impossible because I was so numbed. It’s a shame because amitripyline was helping me tremendously with the bad sleep patterns since it has a sedative effect, but I’ve taken the view that I’d rather put up with some lost sleep than a lost sex life.
Sarah x
Just read through the link on breast cancer and sexuality… it seesm that not only is it all going to dry up but also go saggy as well!!! ( loss of elasticity of vagina wall) apparently … can’t wait for that one …
SarahBeara
From what I’ve read on these forums it’s actually the opposite problem - the loss of elasticity means the vagina wall doesn’t stretch as it used to and therefore intercourse can become very painful.