Well I must be in complete denial. After yesterdays visit to the doctor that confirmed I need checking out. (its the skin puckering that gives cause for concern) I have woken up this morning not worried at all. I have not even checked my lump, which had grown over the last two days.
Sure i have not forgot about it,its somethinkg like a prospective meeting with people you dont know, but its not the big scarey worry that I thought it would be. In fact my mind is more full of the stuff i have to do today and tomorrow.
Mind you I was supposed to book train tickets for our holiday in France in June and I have not done that. and an agent rang with a new booking that i turned down. So some part of my brain must be being cautious.
Even if things do turn out for the worse, at least i am having this time of no worries and pressure and so I will not be mentally exhuasted when it is time to go for the tests.
Mind you this is just today–who knows how i will feel after another nights sleep. Got a gig tonight, so will arrive home at 3 in the morning totally shot and wake up late tomorrow… Lets see