Sorry for long rambling post.
Diagnosed end of Jan. 39yo. Grade 2 invasive ductal er positive Single breast 3cm on 34B bra size. New tiny suspicious lump close by means bigger area to cut out. Slimmish pear shape so local hospital option of licap reconstruction likely not work for me.
Feel confused and disconnected, don’t feel like I really have cancer or really belong with support sites. I want to be practical and get all hospital visits and treatments just over with. I want to feel healthy again and worrying I won’t fully be. Sleep really sucks. I have a young son and a husband and work and life to get on with.
May end up with choice of lumpectomy with breast ‘reshaping’? as don’t have enough tissue to fill up. Then radiotherapy. OR mastectomy preferably with immediate implant and hopefully skip the radiotherapy. Hormone therapy either way.
Am I thinking straight? Now heard might need more taking option mastectomy with immediate implant I just want to get it scraped out and gone then an implant is practically the same as boob job and they are common, people have them all the time for pure cosmetic reasons. Am I crazy in thinking mastectomy and implant would be the fullest and simplest option?
Background below:
Original consultant rough plan lumpectomy and licap reconstruction hormone therapy and radiotherapy of course. consultant surgeon matter of fact straight down to talk lumpectomy and reconstruction from under arm tissue will give good result I hardly had time to hear the previous sentence saying it was cancer.
Had MRI as mammogram did not give good picture due to me (my tissue) being young and dense!
MRI show another small suspicious spec close by (more tests next wk). Dif consultant said new area best taken out but on my size and due to slim build planned tissue harvest area lumpectomy and reconstruction would not work not good look so might as well full mastectomy and implant.
Your story sounds similar to mine. I had a lump confirmed as cancer and then had an MRI which showed another tiny dot close by. Surgeon wanted to take this out too which would have meant much more tissue removed but, because I wanted it gone, I agreed to this and surgery was scheduled again. MDT didn’t like that plan and refused to agree to any operation until they were 100% certain about the other bit so my scans/results were reviewed by an expert and confirmed not cancerous. I ended up just having the main lump removed which gave me a much better outcome than the original plan would have. So, what I suppose I am saying is, I know it’s difficult but try and hold tight until the results from the further tests come back as this could make a big difference to the decision you have to make.
I understand what you are saying about feeling disconnected. I knew it was true and I had cancer but I never felt like I did. It’s weird. I looked and felt totally fine and just wanted it all over and done with as soon as possible. Don’t get me wrong, emotionally I was in pieces. Extra tests and stuff delayed things progressing quickly which was the most difficult part. Same as you I worried I would never feel healthy again and convinced that I would be changed as a person forever by cancer. However, many people, myself included, do fully recover and go back to a completely normal life.
I’d say you know yourself best and psychologically how you feel about loss of a breast. Personally, I’d always felt that I’d be devastated to lose my breast, Im very much attached to them, especially the nipples - which you loose with a mastectomy, its not the same as a boob job by any means.
However, many women dont feel as desperate to keep their boob as I do, and I got lucky with my cancer being simple to extract and relatively not much out compared to my 36 E cup. I’m also still single, so there’s a whole lot of body image factor that goes with that, which may be less of a concern within an established relationship and with young children ( mine’s grown up as older). Despite my boob size, I’m averagely slim so I doubt I’d of had enough flesh to take to fill my ample bust if I’d needed to, so I don’t know what I would of done. In the end, only you know how you feel and whats right for you under the circumstances, its a lot to consider. There is also the matter of radiotherapy and if one pathway avoids it over the other. Catching some rays might seem easy, but actually it can be a physical drain and take months to get over. Its not necessarily treatment you, can put behind you straight away and get on with life to the same effect as you did before, straight away. Same with endocrine therapy, chemo, etc. You can expect to not be feeling exactly as fit and on top as you did before all this started, however, striving to get back to everything can be a help to drive you through it all. You can’t ignore the tiredness, as if you do and push on, you just could feel more drained the next day as doing too much accumulates.
At the moment, your treatment is yet to start, so you feel your usual self, not surprising that some disbelief and denyal of it all goes on. Its a surreal place to be.
Entropy apt username for this phase of life we have been induced into.
Thank you for your message. Think may be in mild to drastic panic stations, if I hadn’t been given the option I wouldn’t have thought about it. It’s good to have choice but I end up trying myself in knots not knowing the best thing. More tests next week for more results and then hopefully clearer idea of options. Hopefully.
I am much older ,70 . I had a bilateral mastectomy with no reconstruction. I am small build and at best a 34B . My breast were not part of my identity and at 70 did not want to waste time in surgery for reconstruction,
However I did see a plastic surgeon and he went through all the stages of surgery with photos and said it would be my choice as to how far I wanted to progress with results. 2 surgical procedures minimum 8 or so for perfection. If I were younger I would go for the 8. At my age being flat is fine ,
Sending hugs
Hi - I have been in very similar position recently. Mine was about 2.5 cm plus a satellite close by that was biopsied and then both had to come out so the excision got a little bigger. Either way my breasts are really small (34b on a good day) plus i’m older. I did get the licap and I’m happy with that aspect. In my case they found positive lymph nodes so I would have had to do radiation either way which can delay reconstruction in the case of mastectomy and implant which I was also considering. The nodes did not show on imaging. No-one even offered my licap until 2 mos in. But I was very relieved to get that option from plastic surgeon. I’m pretty lean so I was borderline. Because I’m older the skin is looser so may have helped. I think it’s better to take your time to make the best choice for you. Just wanted to share that I had a good surgical experience with the lumpectomy/licap in case it is still and option. Sounds like maybe it’s ruled out ? but wasn’t certain reading your post.
Good luck.
Thanks Kaq sound similar. Not rules out the lumpectomy and licap completely. Just confused what will be the best option for the nest outcome of smallest chance cancer left/reoccurring and radiotherapy options. And then the vanity of feeling comfortable with what is left of my body. More tests and appointments. Hopefully should make things clearer. I’ll try and speak to someone to work through the pros and cons.