Counselling Appontment Tomorrow..............

and I have no idea what to expect. I’ve written some notes tonight on how I am feeling.

Sometimes asking for help is the hardest thing. Well done for getting this far, and I hope it will be a good experience for you. I always find it helpful to write things down - stops them going round and round in your mind. Sleep tight, and hope tomorrow goes well for you. Sarah

Hi Cherub

Good luck with your appointment today hope it goes well for you, let us know how you get on

Sending love and hugs



The psychologist was lovely and spent an hour with me discussing what I had written in my notes. I had identified what I need help with a few weeks ago and am also concerned about my lack of focus given that I am trying to retrain at the moment. She feels my confidence issues are not just to do with BC and menopause, but they are going back further (I had a very difficult 5 year period leading up to my diagnosis where I would just get over one thing and something else would happen - this included having a severe flood at my house and my dad’s death). It’s like everything has had a cumulative effect coming to a head with my diagnosis (also problems I’ve had with my sister going into denial about me having BC).

She is seeing me again in the next couple of weeks to set me some goals to work to and says she will be seeing me for a few months. I really want to get this sorted out before any of it becomes too huge to deal with. I was well and positive all the way through my treatment, but I know I just need some help to get through the last push so I can enjoy my life again.

good luck Cherub

I saw someone a few months after my dad died and it helped enormously
love FB xxx

Hi Cherub

sounds like you have made the first steps towards sorting out your life. I think she will help you to sort out what you can do and what is beyond the limits. Then you will be able to focus more clear. You certainly sound much happier - do you feel relieved that it wasn’t as bad as you thought?

Yes I do actually, as I was very apprehensive. My GP wasn’t supportive of me having this as he said I just needed to be positive again (a bit easier said than done at the moment). 2

Sorry, hit the wrong button and only posted half!

As I was saying, my GP was not happy to approve my referral for this (I was trying to get help 4 months ago). My oncologist decided to overrule this as a Consultant I saw for the menopause said I would benefit from some help to get myself back on track. Apparently some GPs are not happy about their patients seeing psychologists. Well, I wasn’t happy about my GP fobbing me off with 2 weeks supply of Tamazepam I’m afraid, sleeping tablets don’t address your emotional well being I’m afraid.

Hi Cherub

So glad that you feel so good about the way the first appointment went,and that you are getting this help and support and have a really good chance to get your life back on the track you want to again. Very interesting what you say about some doctors not wanting their patients to see psychologists. I am part of a university study at the moment on the cognitive/memory/quality of life effects of chemo. Last time I went I was chatting with the psychologist and she had done a recent trawl around the local psychiatrists, counsellors and psychologists to see how many of their patients were people with cancer. She was amazed at the tiny number. She said, just like you, that many GPs “expect” their patients with cancer to be having a hard time after diagnosis and treatment, so because they think it’s “normal” they are reluctant to refer! As she said, this is really awful and an area of real neglect. So, to anyone else reading this and struggling, don’t hesitate to be very firm following through a request for specialist help. My goodness, if anyone might need it it’s people who have been diagnosed with a life threatening illness that requires months if not years of very challenging (and that’s being polite!) treatment!

I can’t believe how small minded your GP was, Cherub. Fobbing you off with pills is a bundle of help, isn’t it!!! What have they got against counselling?? It is a wonderful process. I had it years ago and I can honestly say it helped me change my whole attitude to life. My doctor did refer me but only after I practically begged her because all she would offer were those old fashioned antidepressants which knocked me out. As Seabird says, we must be more forthright in asking for help. Trouble is when we feel like this we are not very forthright and assertive! You can see from many of the posts from the newly diagnosed people on this forum, they are suffering from acute shock which in some, will manifest into depression or post traumatic stress. They do need more than a few pills and the “wise” words of its normal and pull yourself together!!! GP’s !!! take away their prescription pads and they are at a complete loss.

The psychologist told me that she was with another health board until a year ago and was inundated with GPs referring cancer patients, but she has foud that GPs in this area don’t want to put cancer patients forward. She said it’s because GPs here feel too many people are demanding counselling for the least thing. I thought my GP would understand as one of the practice receptionists has BC at the moment. Thing is, had I been an alcoholic or a drug addict I would have had help as the surgery has someone assigned to them every week for this. When I go to the pharmacy next door, all I see are people getting methadone (one girl with a baby the other day which I found distressing).