courage!!
courage!! Hoping to find some courage from all you brave women out there.
Having read some of your stories i feel very lucky, but shamed to say still scared.
Diagnosed in sept, i havent been back to work since. I am a staff nurse in the local hospital where i was diagnosed then subsequntly operated on and somehow cant face the place now.
It used to be a workplace, now feels like the last place i want to go!
My sick line is up in a few weeks and my gp and oncologist tell me work will do me good now, how?
Help!! Any advice or words of wisdom?
—annie —I am posting this reply just as I head out for an appointment with occupational health. I am a staff nurse too and was diagnosed and treated at the hospital where I work. I have been off work for almost a year, having had my surgery last March, then chemo, then radio.
I had an interview with my manager last week and asked him for a staged return to work, and to return on the nightshift where there isnt the hustle and bustle of the daytime. He has readily agreed to this and I will be returning to work around the end of the month, for 2 nights a week. I must admit I do feel quite nervous about going back after all this time, but I have to agree with your oncologist and GP. I feel that after all that has happened in the last year I just want my life to return to normal, and going back to work is one of the major things that will make this happen.
My advice would be, at least give it a try. If you really feel you can’t cope with it then go back to your GP. Also talk it over with your occupational health department, they are there to help you.
Best wishes mary xx
Hey Annie Although I do not have the added pressure of having been treated where I work I do understand how you feel.
I was dx last March and did the slice, dice, roast and toast thing through April till end of July. I did not want to go back to work as I was worried about coping with a stressful job again, interacting with all the people at work who would, by now, know that I had been treated for BC etc. etc., however I decided it was just another thing that had to be faced, like the op and the treatment.
I returned back to work in October on a basis of 3 days in the office and 2 days working from home, luckily I can do that working in IT, especially as I have a one hour drive to and from work each day and I still suffer from tiredness even now.
I do agree with Mary that going back to work is a part of bringing your life back to a more normal existence and it does help to focus your mind on other matters throughout the day instead of letting it dwell on BC and all that it might or might not mean.
You have already been incredibly strong mentally in coping with your dx and treatment and you will never realise how strong you really are if you do not at least give it a try in terms of returning back to work. As Mary advises, if you do find it too much of an ordeal then you can always discuss it further with the relevant support people like your GP.
Best of luck and remember that a life spent hiding away from the world is no life at all.
Love/Siggy
Work I understand how you feel (I’m a health care professional working in the hospital I was originally diagnosed at, had my mastectomy elsewhere, but did have the misfortune to spend a week as an inpatient in my own hospital).
I had 10 months off and getting back through the door again was a real challenge - everything I do day by day is very “close to home”.
My manger (despite the serious concerns I had) has been on the whole,excellent . I was dreading returning - I’d built everything up in my mind to being a real hurdle and it was no where near as bad as I’d predicted. I did a phased return and am still on less than my normal hours (my life is still far from straightforward). I’m not sure long term what I want to do day by day. Work has done me good - its my distraction , and much of it I really enjoy. I need to do something - I want the mental stimulation. Just can’t deal with the petty departmental politics and the broader picture across the trust.( Agenda for Change isn’t far behind Herceptin in amout of grief it is currently causing me).- I can on the whole, put on my “professional head” and the patient bit of me gets fairly well hidden. Just need to work out which bits I wish to loose (the management role I have being one of them). and which bits I would like to consolidate. (Planning on using my forthcoming time off (more surgery) to try and work out exactly what I want to do .
Good luck
Annie I am nearing the end of my hospital based treatment and am due to go back to work in the next few months ( I also live and work in the Falkirk area)
Like Mary, I am having a phased return involving AT LEAST one month of half days .As I only work three days a week any way, I feel that 3 mornings a week will be enough to get me into the swing of things and provide me with companionship and the stimulation I need to get “back on the horse”!
I’ve made it quite clear to my line manager that we need to strike a balance between what is helpful to my recovery and what would be detrimental and that in order for me to be a productive staff member, I need to feel supported in making the big step of returning to work.
Mary and Siggy are both right. If you return to work and find out that you are not ready, you can always go back to your GP and get signed off.
As we both live in Falkirk area, if you ever feel like meeting up for a coffee or a chat or just to offload on someone who understands, please let me know. I’m also in contact with another girl in Stirling (who is a a staff nurse) and we plan to meet up for a coffee soon. So just let me know.
Fee xx
HER-2 Test I think that I have probably been totally nieve or just didn’t ask the right questions but when I was diagnosed 21/2 years ago I thought that if I had been HER-2 I would have been told so believed I wasn’t until I went for my checkup with my breast surgeon in October and he asked whether I would like to know whether I was HER2 because he was asking all his patients whether they would like the test. He said that he couldn’t say whether the path lab would do the test but he would ask. Apparently the test was not routinely carried out 2 years ago. Now I have private medical cover so can’t blame the NHS for this one. As it stands now I am waiting to see my Onc in April to see what is happening. My husband and I were a little shocked at the time. Is this normal procedure?
Hazel
oops - disagreeing with everyone else …Annie I am of the view that you should go back to work when YOU feel ready to. I do not believe that this is something that can or should be rushed or pushed. If you go back and find you cannot face it - this may give you greater anxiety and may have a detrimental effect on your return to recovery. This is cancer and you were only diagnosed in September - this is no time at all. Personally I think you should give yourself the summer off. They will wait and you need to come to terms with this emotionally at your own pace. I am a mental health professional and lecturer and believe me I meet plenty of people in this profession who did not give themselves a break when they needed to. Listen to you body
Best wishes
Celeste
— Annie I am also a health professional diagnosed at about the same time and have been thinking about work…reluctantly!! I knoew that I’m going to have to think about going back purely for financial reasons. Have you not get outstanding holiday that you can take? Do remeber that when you do go back that we come under the Disability Discrimination Act so things like ensuring you have proper breaks, and not working too many shifts in a row are all things that have to be provided
back at work after one year i am worried i am putting my arm at risk, working in the healthcare proffession it is unavoidable to comply with the advice we are given about lymphodeama i would like to hear from anyone in the same situation please as i worry constantly
thanks Thanx for all your advice, i have phoned work and asked for a meeting with the charge nurse and personnel. Its reassuring to know im not the only one scared to return to work!! A phased return sounds like the only way to go.
Fee, if you read this, i would like very much to meet with you and the other woman from stirling. It seems strange but i have never met nor spoken to anyone diagnosed with breast cancer.
As you know it can feel very lonely at times and ones mind works overtime.
Thanks again
Ann(Annieo)