Daily cancer thoughts

Hi everyone, trying hard to move on from my BC in 2017, IDC, grade 3, two surgeries, mastectomy then chemo, physically I’m fine, mentally…not so, there is not a day goes by when it’s not in my mind, all the what ifs! Every single Niggle of pain, I worry, it seems to put a damper on everything, every time something good happens, for example…just found out yesterday my daughter got her uni degree, I was happy, but not as happy as I should have been, it’s like the cancer thoughts are continually on my shoulder…don’t forget! You’ve had cancer, it could come back!! It seems to spoil everything, has anyone else had this? Will I genuinely ever feel truly happy again??

Hi Munchkin. Yes I know Exactly how you feel. I had a mastectomy  followed by chemo finishing last May for Triple neg 1 node grade 2. I’m trying to be positive as worrying about it returning will not stop it, but its always there niggling away putting a dampener on my day. I have read other ladies say the longer you are NED the less you think about it returning.Let’s hope this is true for us soon. All the best.


Hi I had to answer this post Munchkin even though I use another forum and rarely post here. Your post is identical to how I feel.  Although diagnosis 2016 I still struggle. Like you I have a lovely day then think .what are you doing. You’ve had cancer it could come back. Why are you forgetting that .It’s so hard .I think the only thing will help me is time with no 'recurrence. I am further on than you and do have better days now message me if you wish or if you find the answer. I also had aggressive grade three xx and think constantly of cancer !! X

Me too girls hate myself for these thoughts they pop on and ruin good days as the thoughts pop up from deep within ? i am actively trying to move on with a return to work, my garden and spending time with my family and friends and my counselling sessions i attended at Maggies i was a TN too finished all my treatments end Jan, i feel a bit silly as i breezed through surgery, was really strong during chemo and rads even though i had a few bad experiences with treatments, my daughter said sometimes she forgot i was even having treatment, then wham this silly overthinking and worrying has set in, i had an absolute melt down in the bath last night as i found a swelling below collar bone opposite side went to my GPS and he said its rib inflammation made me feel like i was being over anxious and i felt silly afterwards like you all i am really hoping eventually i will start feeling better soon xxx

Hi Munchkin


It’s Emily here from Breast Cancer Care.


I’m really sorry to hear how you’re feeling. I just wanted to let you know that we have telephone volunteers who are a few years past their own diagnosis and treatment, and who asked themselves the same question.


If you’d like us to arrange for you to talk to one of them, feel free to give us a call on 0345 077 1893.


Wishing you all the best in the meantime.

Emily at Breast Cancer Care

Hi Juliewulie,
Just a little reassurance try not to feel guilty, we all been through a scary diagnosis, nobody is any worse than you, just maybe some getting less treatment than others. I remember at the beginning I was asking questions but I didn’t really want to know the answer, to me I asked a few daft questions but got told there are no daft questions!!! Since I got diagnosed I have known 5 people after myself and 1 is no longer here, I remember the guilt I felt when she died, it is quite hard picking yourself back up again but you’ve got to do it. Is it the Moving Forward Course you are going to? Because honestly if it is I recommend that to everyone, at the beginning I was so scared but then I needed someone to talk to, that is in the same position as us. I honestly can say it worked a great deal for me. Don’t be so hard on yourself, I’ve kind of learnt that recently, take care.x

Hi munchkin just a thought what about the Maggies where now courses they are really good i attended one in March they are 8 weeks and found it really helpful met some lovely people too, the maggies centres have some great things going on xx