Sandra - thanks for your advice - pls dont take offence, but you sound exactly like my mum did before she got dementia, reassuring and no nonsense - calm your selp type of advise - it was lovely - actually made me smile remembering my mum before and how she would have been - thank you.
Well girls - i know this sounds stupid, but i have actually managed to eat a shape low fat orange flavoured yoghurt!!! I know its not much but first thing to pass my lips today.
I have considered going to the out of hours gp, but round here they are an absolute nightmare… it takes me over half hour to get there and then you end up waiting for eternity… think i might try some red wind instead!
I have read every single one of the post you have all put on my thread and i want to thank all of you so much - i have been crying through a lot of them and i admire the strong women that you are, and the openness that you have, and willing give to others… i know that is corney, but you are all so brave. (and very nice women).
One more night to go and will be talking the a very stressed GP… My dad may be elderly - but he protects his family with his whole being.
Thanks Again,
Corinne
Ps i have just re read my post - and i actually sound a bit better…not so panicky - u think???
Corinne, Well that made me laugh! ‘reassuring and no nonsense’ if you had seen my posts when l first came on here, you would have thought l was mad! l had so many lymph nodes infected thought that was it! took me ages to calm myself down! And in a month or so you will be giving the same advice to someone else in a panic about their diagnosis.
Really sorry to hear about your Mum, my Dad had alzheimers,dreadful illness. hope your dad is coping, sounds like he will protect the family very well, my Dad was like that.
Hi Corrine,
Yes you do sound more in control, well done. You are just as brave as the next man (or woman!). Read the words of “Hero” by Marah Carey, and you will see. (google hero lyrics) Good luck with your doc tomorrow with the help of your Dad.
Hugs Maria
Corinne you do sound a bit better tonight. I hope the glass of wine gets you off to sleep and you get some rest. I do hope you have a supportive GP and that you feel more like yourself soon. Take care of yourself first and the rest will all fall into place…it will you know. Love Val
just read your post now and so reminds me of myself i cant even go back to thinking how scared i was and the week of not even going to bed just crying all the time and panicing about a cough, bad back and everything was it and i couldnt control the panic - my bc nurse was great - hope you get some peace tomorrow xxxx
I do hope that the red wine helped you sleep. Good to read your post last night you do sound like you are getting in control and your yogurt is a start to eating again!
Sorry post is so late - had trouble getting my boys to sleep.
It has been a long day today!!
Spoken to the gp (different one) she has given me diazepam 2 mg for in the day and 5 mg for the long nights (which she says i can double up if ness)… She was so supportive and has even made an appt with her tomorrow in case i need further support (her suggestiion not mine)… i was well impressed.
I got a telephone call from the bcn today asking me to go into the hospital, (start of the first panic attack of the day)… why!!! had they found something really bad.
Got to the hospital, and they have now scheduled me in to have mx on friday (queue second panic attack) - why the rush!!!
It just appears that they have a slot in the surgery schedule and wanted to get me in…
Tumour is a grade 3 - not gud… but apparantly most young women have the more aggressive type… lucky me euh… She couldnt give me any further info. Though she did say that she thinks it is unlikely to have spread, but on asking why she thought this, it was because i was young and would be in more pain had it spread - does this make sense to anyone??
So i am now sitting here panicking about friday and what they will find… not sure if i want to know now…
How paranoid is this? - was sitting here earlier feeling my stomach, again that scared feeling is not just in your breast… and i found a very hard long ‘lump’… only when i had calmed myself down somewhat did i realise that it had a pulse!!! Just shows you what the mind does… i will now stop feeling any parts of my body…
Hope everyone else on here has a a gud day, and that tomorrow will be better for all!
I’m so pleased you managed to see an understanding GP. Just so you know, my tumour was also a grade 3. It just means its quite active. The good thing is you are getting your surgery quickly so can get on with the treatment.
Hi Corrinne,
So glad that you are getting some better support now and you have some medication to help. At least your op will now be done quickly so you won’t be spending weeks dreading it, before you know it it will be done and you will be home, usually in hospital a couple of days…not long, and in the meantime you will be organising everyone.
One of my lumps was grade 3 (I was greedy and had it in both breasts) and I had node involvement and yes (pinching myself) I am still here and intend to be for hundreds of years yet:-))
Take care, look after yourself, here if you need
Hugs Suze xx
Hi Corinne Pleased to hear your GP was so supportive and to the extent of making you another appt too.Its good that your surgery is soon now you can get on with treatment and the minimum of time to stress about it ( if you can do such a thing on diazepam?)Remember if you have lost weight you maybe able to feel bits of your anatomy that you couldn’t before eg ribs and other bony bits. They are not cancer which has spread.Our imaginations can run riot can’t they? When the surgeon drew my boob to show me where my lump was there was a big dot which I was fixated on and was positive that was another cancer that had not been spotted earlier, when I asked him what it was he said with a deadpan face that’s your nipple lol. My BCN knew exactly what I thought and she and I managed to have a good laugh about it.Sleep well Jackie
well done on being proactive today, its a big step getting people to listen and help and now you have got tablets to help you, plus you have added a lovely supportive gp to your team of people who will help you through this. My gp has been fantastic and it really helps to have them there.
Glad your op has been brought forward, so much better to have less time to stress and just get started on your treatment.
Corinne, you sound so much like me at the mo - every time I eat, I can’t swallow (throat cancer!), cough twice (lung cancer), pains in arms and legs (bone cancer) - no wonder we’re so bloody stressed!!! The breast cancer is quite a doddle really compared to all our other problems - ha ha!
What, lovely positive people on this forum, I hope you have found some comfort Corinne, I know I have and I’ve only been ‘signed up’ for a few days!
Best of luck on Friday - Complan full of calories/nutrients, so good to drink (even if you do have to hold your nose to do it!) and a robust red wine to follow!
Norma x
Hope the tablets are doing the trick and you are getting some sleep.
Good news that they are operating this week- I’m in on Thursday- at least they will get the “baddies” out!
As for the other aches and pains,try not to let your imagination run away with itself. Before you were diagnosed, you would never have let a little ache manifest itself into something more sinister! Far too busy being mum, chief cook and bottlewasher!
I hope you have got your childcare sorted out. My boys are off for a long sleepover at their cousins and are really excited. Luckily they will only be around the corner so will be able to pop in and see me.
Re food, I’m finding soft fruit the easiest to eat and good for you too. Lots of strawberries, grapes,raspberries etc to pick on. No preparation required!
I’ve been diagnosed last year and i have a young son too. I havent got the right words for you but just that you are not alone. This dark place will go and soon you will smile again.
I admire your strength through this difficult time. I appreciate how hard and scary it is. I don’t have BC but my mum has, I’m posting on her behalf because it affects us all.
I have been to the hospital today to have an ultrasound on my lower parts!! The doc states there is nothing untoward on my liver, kidneys or stomach… one test down two to go - after this news i managed to eat a whole pack of the crisps!!!
have a bit of a wobble yesterday tho… had to go into the hospital for my pre-op assessment and they sent me to the wrong place… i ended up in the chemo ward, and on seeing a row of dummys heads with different scarfs on i just burst into tears… think they thought i was mad, ended up calling my bcn down to calm me!!! i then started ranting about where the cancer could be - bet i sounded like a neurotic (?sp)…
Back into hospital tomorrow to see consultant and sign forms for op… fingers crossed for the results of the chest xray…
Bcn has already told me there will be hot spots on my ct scan for bones as i have Rheumatoid Arthritis!!