I both got and gave a lot of support on this forum back in 2010 when I was diagnosed with grade 3 in right breast. Had lumpectomy, chemo, radiotherapy, herceptin, tamoxifen and now on letrozole. Last August I was diagnosed with DCIS in left breast and have had 3 WLE but still didn’t have a clear margin. So I’ll be having a mastectomy and DIEP reconstruction followed by radio very soon. Don’t have a date yet but my pre-op assessment is on Friday so it won’t be long.
I am gutted about losing a breast and am guilty about feeling so bad as I’ve much to be grateful for - no secondaries or even node involvement and very supportive friends and family. But atm I’m spending my days in my PJs til the afternoon- just can’t get motivated to get things done even though I know I won’t be able to for a while after the op.
Hi Lilac, just wanted to let you know I understand where you’re coming from. I was diagnosed in June’17 with TN bc and had a WLE, chemo and radiotherapy. I was diagnosed with a recurrence in the same breast last week. I had a CT scan this morning and got to have a bone scan next week before I get my treatment plan, which if the scans are clear a mastectomy and then probably chemo again. Like you, I just can’t get motivated to do anything even though there is a lot I need to do! I’m pre-occupied with the scans and scared that they might show up something and worrying with every ache and pain and my imagination is working over-time!
Like you, I’ve got very supportive friends and family. I went away to a friend’s after being diagnosed, which I’m glad I did, but it was tiring talking about it and then having to try to be normal! I’ve found since then, apart from seeing my daughter’s, I’ve shut myself away. I’m finding it hard that everyone is carrying on with their usual lives and I’ve got this hanging over me x
Lilac - Please don’t feel guilty, despite being free of secondaries or node involvement. I lost both my boobs 2006 and then 2007. Wasn’t due to secondary spread either, but another Primary. Had masts and both ANC. Avoided rads by having masts rather than lumpectomies, and luckily didn’t require chemo.
It’s still major, what you’re facing. Don’t compare, and don’t be so hard on yourself, as everyone copes differently anyway.
I’m soo glad you’ve opted for immediate recon, though. It’s got to be a massive help to immediately replace the loss, I would think, hope, feel.
Much love xxxx