Didnt think Id be here so soon!

Hi Ladies,

Just to fill you in with the past 18 months - I was diagnosed with BC in the left breast June 06, aged 26. Was due for lumpectomy but tumour grew so big had to have mastectomy and lymph clearanc (10 out of 14 nodes involved) followed by E-CMF and 15 sessions of radiotherapy. August this year had the other breast removed with immediate LD flap recon & implant prophylactically. Great results, got new job, hair looks great and feeling good about life again. Fell pregnant 3 weeks after rads finished OMG lovely surprise. Lost it at 8 weeks but looking on the positive side probably for the best as only just finished treatment and wouldnt know if chemo would affect baby. Went into hospital to have it removed. Fell pregnant again 2 months later OMG - very anxious this time needless to say lost it and had it removed in theatre again last week. The night before going into hospital found a lump at the top of my reconstructed breast. Got urgent appt with breast surgeon, went for ultrasound with FNA yesterday. Nodule looked normal on scan but the results of the FNA came back with a different story.

So here I am - back in no-mans land. They are having a meeting about what to do next Tuesday and I wont find out until Thursday. I dont mind having the lump removed and rads again but I am really scared about chemo. Im hoping that they have caught it early enough so I dont need chemo but who am I kidding - at 28 they will probably offer it me any way. This puts me in a really crap position. I have a great husband and a 3 year old - but Im terrified of chemo again - losing my hair, feeling crap for another year but whats the alternative not have chemo and risk not seeing my gorgeous boy grow up?

I never would have thought that I would have a recurrence so soon nor did I think that I would have a recurrence following mastectomy - although of course there are still risks of recurrence if they leave some breast tissue behind.

Can anyone offer me advice or reassurance cos I really, really need it right now!

Ju xx

Hello Ju

I haven’t got any advice to offer but just wanted you to know how sorry I am that this is happening to you. I shall be thinking about you.
Good luck next week and let us know what they say.
Love Anthi x

Hi Ju

No advice I’m afraid, but a huge hug sent your way. I well understand the thrill of knowing you’re pregnant followed by the trough of losing the baby. Throwing BC into the melting pt as well is just adding insult to injury. All I can say is look after the little one you have for now, he’ll give you so much strength. Mourn your little lost babies - they didn’t get very big, but they are still very special. Somehow you’ll all get through this and be stronger than ever before.


Ruth x x x x

Hi Ju,

Am in same situation as you at the moment - was dx in Feb this year, mastectomy, no chemo or rads - have found lump in upper part of reconstruction and had urgent ultrasound and FNA yesterday. Hoping it’s scar tissue, but every other test has been worst news so am feeling a bit hey ho, here we go. Am scared that, if it is bad news, have to go down the chemo route and that really scares me.

Thinking of you - this wasn’t supposed to happen, was it?

Sally xxx

Hello Ju

You poor girl. I thought that when I had BC 10yrs ago at 36 was bad enough. I had a lumpectomy followed by a masectomy due to the margin of clearace not being enough.

Having a husband who is loving and understanding is a real plus for you. Losing two pregnances must feel terrible but maybe for now put any energy you have into your little boy and your hubby.

My BC came back 10yrs to the month. I never thought for one minute that it would ever come back. Then looking on this website made me realise how lucky I had been.

Although its hard just do what you can when you can. Its a journey with lots of ups and downs, that we have to travel.

Use the website for extra support.

Take good care of yourself.

Debbie x

Ju & Sally,

Just wanted to say I am thinking of you and please keep in contact with us through this site. Hope some positive news comes your way soon.


Hello ladies,

Thank you for your support.

Sally - how come you are having to wait for your FNA results - dont they tell you thi same day? Am keeping my fingers crossed for you. Keep in touch.

I decided to take the Wednesday off work and do some retail therapy - really helped and I am now the proud owner of some gorgeous boots! Went back to work Thursday - no point sitting at home on my own dwelling about it. They have arranged to see me after the MDT on Tuesday so at least we’ll know whats happening sooner. I rang my plastic surgeon in Stoke to let him know whats happened and he rang me on Friday, from London where he’s doing a course, bless him. He said they could do a number of things and he wants to be very involved with whats happening and will be keeping in touch with me. Move over BUPA! Have to say working for the NHS does have some perks - I was treated like royality when I went for my ERPC last week - was first on list, got my own room etc. Just wish I didnt need to utilise it.

Will let you know whats happening on Tuesday.

Ju x


The drs had their MDT meeting and I had an appt that afternoon. They couldnt tell me anything I didnt already know other than Im having my op next Wednesday as a day case - lumpectomy and ANC. Will have to have yet more scars as the mastectomy scar is too low and also a scar under my arm for the ANC - hey ho already hacked to pieces any way.

Results will be back in the new year so am trying to forget about it all, thankfully its xmas and birthdays before then to keep me occupied.

Surgeon did say though that I would “probably” need chemo due to my age - argh! Not what I wanted to hear but its not a definite “you will be having chemo” so still clutching very tightly to that straw, just in case.

Sally - any news yet - Im keeping everything crossed for you.

Ju x

Hi Ju,

Thanks for your concern - I was waiting until I got my results - but am still waiting. Rang today and the results are in, but my consultant was not! The secretary said thay it looks like they didn’t get enough cells the first time, so I will probably have to go back again - not easy with 6 kids to look after (not all mine!) as I now live in London but am still under the Norfolk and Norwich hospital. Anyway, I’m hoping they didn’t get enough because it’s scar tissue, if you see what I mean. Not particularly looking forward to another one as I didn’t have any local anaesthetic as I thought it would be numb - NOT!!

I think they’re not too worried about it, hence not getting the results the same day. But it did look just like the first lump on the screen - I just HATE all the waiting - in limbo land and trying not to snap at the children and OH.

I hope your op goes well and fingers and everything else crossed for you re chemo - that’s what scares me the most too.

Lots of love,

Sally xx

Love and best wishes Ju and Sally. Cyber hugs. Hope to hear good news from both of you soon.
Love Kate xx