I’m 33 and last year I had a nipple-sparing mastectomy and DIEP reconstruction after diagnosis. I chose to keep my nipple and my surgeon was very clear with my that this would likely mean more than one surgery to get the desired summetry. I understood that most DIEP surgeries require a phase 2 anyway so was comfortable with this. Nearly 18 months on and I’m healed and assymetric, as expected, and I’ve been reviewed for phase 2. My surgeon has been great with advice on what can be offered and everything was looking straightforward until she asked if I was planning on having kids, at which point she strongly recommended I wait until after this for surgery as pregnancy changes the body and she can fix these things during surgery as she would also be addressing misshapen areas on my stomach, where my reconstruction tissue was taken from.
I’m 33, due to be married next year and have no kids. My treatment includes endocrine therapy so I wouldn’t be clear to come off this and try for a child before mid 2027, at which point it could be up to 2 years of trying, followed by 9 month pregnancy (if we’re lucky enough) plus another 9 months out (according to surgeon) which leaves me between 2029 - 2031 for my phase 2.
I feel so unhappy with my nipple asymmetry and just want it fixed ASAP but keep looking at the timeline and trying to question whether it’s worth it for symmetry for a year or so, for my body to then potentially change drastically with pregnancy. I worry I’ll regret not taking my surgeon’s advice and waiting however I just feel I look comical rather than in any way attractive with my current results.
Other important info - I’ve been through chemo which had a 50% chance of causing fertility. I have 3 embryos in the freezer after IVF fertility preservation pre chemo (which I’m so grateful for), and I will be 35 by the time I can attempt to conceive. I worry I put this surgery off and then am unable to have kids anyway and eventually accepting the surgery will feel like a consolation prize.
This is very niche as most folk I’ve met on this journey have already have kids and I’m yet to meet anyone else with a assymetrical nipple sparing result but wanted to throw it out there in case anyone had been through anything similar or had any wise words for me.
). Feeling good about how you look I’m sure would help you conceive, so perhaps worth thinking about it from that perspective? 5 years is a long time to wait to feel good about the way your breasts look. EVeryone’s situation is so unique. This makes it very hard. But all I would say is I know just how isolating a situation it is to be diagnosed just before you’re due to get married, when you want children and are in your 30s. Big hug to you. Lisa x PS I’m now 53 and have a 13 year old