I have just finished chemo and have started endocrine therapy for a hormone positive breast tumor that was diagnosed in late May of this year. All has gone well including the double mastectomy I received in early July and now that I’m through chemo and recovering it’s time to think about reconstruction. I’ve always been pretty adamant about wanting a DIEP. However, now that I’m getting closer to the mapping MRI I am finding myself very nervous. I hate scans. Not because I find them painful but because I am petrified about the results. I was node negative, LVI negative, and in the US they don’t do scans unless there is a specific reason to suspect spread so this mapping MRI will be the first one I’ve done. And I’m scared of what they’ll find and because of that actually rethinking my decision which I know isn’t a smart thing. How do I calm my fears? I feel pretty good right now. Still have some leg muscle soreness from chemo but that’s only been over for six weeks so it’s not concerning. But no fatigue or any other lingering effects and my endocrine therapy has only been going on for a week and a half but thus far I’ve noticed nothing with that. So all in all I feel almost as good as before surgery. But still scared crapless and I hate it. My upcoming Dexa scan is weirding me out, too.
Dear Kay,
Well done to you for doing so well you have been through so much a double Mastectomy, chemo together with all your other treatments and it’s only a few months away please try and be a little kinder to yourself I know you’re dreading the MRI but I feel sure you can do this, which will move you on to your next stage with your reconstruction.
Unfortunately, we don’t always trust good news, and waiting time is endless also anxiety takes such a toll on us.
Thinking of you, wishing you health and happiness going forward. Please take one day at a time a nice coffee with a good understanding friend goes a long way.
with the biggest hugs Tili 
please keep posting and let us know how you are getting along xx