dilemma

I have my appointment with the consultant on wednesday. As my father recently passed away with bone mets, and my mother with breast cancer a few years ago i felt that, until we are sure at least, my family do not need this extra burden. Then i discover my daughter’s appointment with the neurologist is the same day as my appointment, and as her only way of getting there is my car … i am stuck.
last thing she needs is to be fretting about me, but i can’t let her down.
i know you can’t solve this, but i just needed someone to moan to.

Just an addendum. My daughter’s appointment has been postponed until after another MRI scan, so she didn’t need to know about my appointment at the Breast Clinic yesterday.
They were very thorough and have warned me that, given my age, the feel of the lump etc that they are taking it very seriously. I had a mammogram and core biopsy and see the consultant tomorrow morning after the MDT meeting. I am under no delusions that we are looking at just a cyst, and am really just waiting for the news as to the stage and what forms of treatment they are offering. Unlike most of the posters I have read so far, I have nobody to go with me.
The real ‘fun’ part is is that after the biopsy my bra just won’t fit - so busy looking for clothes to wear outside!
I wish you all the very best in your experiences and treatments.

Hi quisie,

I was sorry to hear about your family. You are not alone on here. You seem to have decided the outcome; I had too after mammogram and biopsy! So, no shock really when I was told the news. I did not involve my husband until I had the confirmation. Please keep us posted and I wil be thinking of you tomorrow. Good luck.

Margaret

Hi Margaret,
thank you so much for your support - it was also good to know that i am not alone in leaving the telling until i knew for certain. I saw Surgeon Steve today (I do hope he is happy with that name) and he confirmed cancer. To be specific, lobular cancer stage II/ III. Just to add interest I have inflammatory cancer - well, would be silly to be simple!!! Next week I have a CT scan and a bone scan for mets, then see him again on 17th when he has the results. Should be hormone receptive, but will know more after the mastectomy. I’ve opted for surgery/ chemo, radio in that order. This weekend will be tough, I have to tell my sisters and my daughters.
Feeling fragile right now, not so much because of the cancer, but because I won’t be able to do my first ever holiday after al. It was a trip planned over months, so i am very disappointed.
Hope all’s well with you
bestest regards
Ruth

Hi Quisie,

Mine was hormone receptive and I had surgery, chemo then rads. You will feel better when you have told your family though they won’t be expecting the news. I poured my husband a couple of glasses of wine then told him. He was stunned into silence but then rallied and, having a background in chemistry, started to analyse everything quite clinically! Whilst I got drunk.

I am so sorry about your holiday disappointment. But just look on it as a postponement and not a cancellation.

Go and enjoy the sunshine and good luck with breaking the news.

Keep in touch.

Margaret x

thank you Margaret - with the agreement of my breast nurse i am working on the getting drunk stage! The trip is cancelled - it took 50 years to get to afford this, i think at 100 i will be a wee bit too old for holidays. But it was a beautiful dream :smiley:
Ruth
x

Hi Ruth,

You must have that holiday when all this is behind you. Dreams should be realised.

Margaret x

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same

The money I had is committed to that trip, I made promises. I committed money for the street kids, for the single mums. Instead of me being there to see things for myself they will go ahead without me. I have no means to make money, so it is lost. Fact of life. That though is the one thing that hurts. Everything else I can cope with. Giving up the opportunity of a lifetime is not so easy.

hugs though Margaret, thinking of you and wishing you the very very best

Ruth

I’m so so sorry Ruth. I understand more about the trip now.

Margaret x

thank you Margaret, on the plus side I have been promised loads of photos to look at when it’s all cold and wet and miserable outside! Also, I’m still involved with the planning, so, now I’ve come down from the “poor me” place it’s not so very bad really. The kids and the mums will still have the help they were going to be getting.
hugs
Ruth