Falling apart

I havent used the forums for a while but I could really do with someone to talk to.

I was diagnosed in April 2010 at the age of 36 and been cancer free since April 2011 but I feel like my life is falling apart. Ive returned to full time employment, but my relationship at rock bottom. Due to the tamoxifen my sexlife is non existent as I find sex extremely painful even with the use of various creams suggested by my consultant. Has Any one else had similar issues

Hi Sarah

Welcome back, I’ve missed you. I have sent you a PM. Take care


I’m three months ahead of you in treatment and getting back to work, and I also hit a very low patch when things were meant to be getting back to normal; I think after we get through the crisis of active treatment then later the emotional stuff hits, you feel really exhausted by the whole process. And that’s without a demanding husband to deal with. It’s a time for, What about me? and instead you have had to put up with, What about Him?

I’d suggest giving the helpline a call, they are very sympathetic and can understand and support in various ways, it may also be that your GP can offer practical help and/or counselling support to both of you. Full time work is also pretty stressful even without having been ill; is there any workplace support / occupational health available to you?

You have a lot of life ahead of you, so please don’t let this rough patch drag you down, you deserve help now just as much as you did when there was cancer in you. I had other issues that interfered with my well-being and recovery at the worst possible time, and made it all just too much, random family stuff and nothing to do with my cancer, but it arrived exactly when I was already feeling very down, and my GP has been wonderful. I’m finally picking up the threads of the exercise plan that I had started last year but abandoned when “the sky fell in”, and slowly the old pick-me-up endorphins are doing their job. (…and I now have real aches and pains to worry about!) What’s your favourite pick-me-up? Indulge it!

Thank you so much for your posts. It has been a great source of comfort to know that I’m not on my own.

Ive got a lot of family stuff going on at the moment which is getting me down and just feeling like running away.

Vickie and hymil you have both offered really good advice, thanks both xx

I understand there are menopausal clinics that you can get referred to if you think the tamoxifen is affecting you. Other than that just sending love and best wishes