This is my first post ever on any forum…
A cancer diagnosis causes a lot of fear. Prior to my diagnosis I believe that if I had been asked if I would like to improve my 10 year survival chances by 5% by subjecting myself to 6 months of chemo I would have said “are you having a laugh?” Now I find I am considering it and wonder whether this is because I have been catapulted into a weird place of fear . Does a cancer diagnosis make us act unlike ourselves and lose our better judgement because of the fear it induces.
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Interesting question. I’ve found the opposite: my long-standing behaviours are amplified. I try to make rational decisions that align with my values. With cancer, this translates as ‘just getting on with it’, underpinned by moments of vulnerability, usually in private, to avoid alarming my children.
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In my case yes fear played a part in making a wrong decision . I was grade 1 stage 1 early ER+ of a time that rarely spreads it seems that this decision should not make a difference but it was still the wrong decision. To explain it would be to write a short novel so I’m not going to go into it here but when I looked into myself to understand why I did what I did some of the deciding factors were based on fear - and I’ve been annoyed at myself over it. I since also made the decision to stop hormone therapy and to stay off it when there have been chances to restart - it’s one I may come to regret but a more considered one though initially it was anger and not fear that played a part in that one . The problem with this disease is that there are all these decisions to make and even with some background medical knowledge you can’t know everything and understand everything sometimes there isn’t much time to decide and yes I think we are often influenced both consciously and subconsciously by our own fears which our minds can translate as rational thoughts. I’m quite good at deceiving myself and I know I’m not alone in in that.
All I can tell you is to make the decision you think you can live with but for what it’s worth my survival Predict score only improved 1.3 % over 15 without hormone therapy . If it had been 5% I might have been keener to continue with it.
Best of luck to you xx
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Hi there,
It’s so hard to make rational decisions when we are terrified after diagnosis. All I would say is listen to your team, they know. Whilst I do think it’s important to advocate for ourselves, and learn, sometimes we forget that everyone’s journey is different and our treatment is tailored specifically to our situation by a multidisciplinary team. Fortunately I was told that my BC was low grade and stage and I had a very good prognosis that I was exceptionally thankful for. My PREDICT score benefit for hormone therapy was very low but they told me to take it for 5 years so I do, every day without fail. Yes it makes me tired, gives me aching joints, pain and terrible insomnia but I never miss a dose. If that small percentage of chance, that tiny window of opportunity stops the bugger coming back then I’ll take that every time.
All the best x
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Hi sorry your in this position
I agree with @JoanneN i too didn’t take hormone therapy side effects were awful for me , I think when your first diagnosed
Everything moves very fast given books leaflets loads of advice my surgeon tried everything so I didn’t need a mastectomy but found more cancer couldn’t get Clear margins the only thing I regret was having implant straight away didn’t work for me
Sometimes you just feel overwhelmed and haven’t the time to process everything
I wish you luck I have no regrets have to live with my decisions x
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@vanessa1
I think the decisions we have to make seem rushed because treatment needs to start. But please don’t worry about having chemo, it’s honestly not that bad. There are a lot of very powerful chemos that some people are treated with ie: for blood cancers but the chemos we need for bc aren’t that intensive. Obv u won’t feel great but please don’t dread it (I was a chemo nurse myself before my diagnoses). Hope this helps with your decision making. This forum is so helpful, u won’t feel alone xxx
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Adding to this, your chemo team will do everything in their power to make sure you are as well as you can be. They do not want you to suffer.
Welcome to the forum @vanessa1
I’m sorry to hear what you’re going through at the moment. A lot of people here can certainly identify with feelings of fear.
If you’re feeling unsure about anything, please know that the forum is here for you and so are our specialist breast care nurses. Are nurses are here for clinical question and just to chat. They can be reached on the Ask our Nurses your questions board on the forum or over the phone 0808 800 6000.
We’re thinking of you,
Lucy