Feeling overwhelmed and lost

Is it just me? Surgery (s) done - (L skin sparing mastectomy, with termporary implant, and left axillla node removal). RT completed. On Letrazole and Ribo - and just had my first Zoledronic infusion. I will have a reconstruction next year. But I’m struggling mentally. The prognisis is good - Prosigna test done which was a huge relief as I was lucky not to need nasty chemo - and I’m just now in the limbo stage…take the tablets and wait to see my surgeon in Feb next year.

Mentally I am a mess. I do have a wonderful supportive hubby and daughter (who has just presented me with my second grandchild) so I should be feeling more positive? I hate everything about my diagnosis - why me? why not me? how should I feel? why can’t I move forwards? am I going to get a recurrence? I just want to scream and cry quite a lot of the time but I can’t. I do exercise regularly and that helps for a little while. but I have lost my enjoyment for life.

Any suggestions please

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Goodness @thelmat you are actually doing so well generally, but yes, it all takes it out of us doesnt it. :heart::heart::heart::flexed_biceps::people_hugging:

Be aware Hormone Blockers can make some ladies mental health suffer due to the effects of the drugs themselves. Some have found certain brands have been more problematic compared to others.

Each pharmaceutical company uses a slightly different combination of ingredients to make the actual tablets. And some of those ingredients can create nasty side effects. So initially I would check all that out first.

My Oncologist did say that Letrozole had side effects similar to chemotherapy drugs. I also heard of one lady who staggered taking the Meds for that reason.

Its worth reading other threads on here related to Letrozole etc, so you can see if there is any correlation between the drugs and how you are feeling.

With chemo I learnt to rest a lot. Im considering doing the same for Hormone Blockers if I start having problems.

The fact you have not had chemo, could mean you are more aware of the side effects. Whereas, I am hoping, having gone through chemo and survived, I may find Im more able to tolerate side effects. At the moment I chose to have a slight break from meds until I completed radiotherapy. I needed my body to recover a bit more before piling a load of other ingredients into it.

But on a general level of anxiety and low mood, I found doing: Simple meditation and breathing helped; eating well; giving myself lots of TLC; resting often; doing simple Arts/Crafts; watching good Movies/programmes; chatting to friends; coming on this Forum; accessing BCNow, Someone Like Me Volunteer; chatting to Nurses on this Website; chatting to MacMillan Nurses and Wellbeing Volunteers; accessing courses for Understanding cancer pathways.

Other ladies have found the following to be helpful:

Acupuncture; yoga; wellbeing YouTube Videos; exercise of your choice (but done carefully); attending a local Maggies Cancer Centre; going on Online Courses via Look Good Feel Good Courses; applying for goodies boxes eg. From Little Lifts; accessing Cancer trained Counsellor.

The more of a variety of strategies we access, the better we get through the anxiety.

But remember anxiety is created for a number of reasons eg. Medical effects from drugs; worries; worrying about worries; not eating enough of the right foods; not getting enough sleep etc. So try and see if you can figure out the root causes of low mood, then you will be able to have more targetted solutions to it.

Hope this gives you a starting point.

Happy to share more if needed.

You will get through this. It just all takes time.

:heart::heart::sparkling_heart::sunflower::people_hugging:

Sending love.

You’ve had a lot to deal with so it’s not surprising your emotions are all over the place so give yourself grace.

Having said that Letrozole gave me many gifts including anxiety and suicidal thoughts so do take time to investigate that with your GP or team.

There is an after treatment course offered by Breast Cancer Now Moving Forward course | Life after breast cancer treatment | Breast Cancer Now which may be useful or other services like Maggie’s would also offer support.

I feel that whilst we’re in active treatment the fight it mentally sees us through but afterwards there’s a lot of feelings to unpack and deal with.

Make sure you do something you enjoy every day.

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