Hello… diagnosed in mid-June after routine mammogram; up for lumpectomy surgery in a week. No lump, no pain, no nothing, so a massive and dreadful shock which hit me like a truck. I am 56, relatively fit, relatively healthy, enjoy my life and have lots going on - now I feel it’s all about to go down the toilet and there is nothing I can do. I’ve tried to prepare by finding out about the treatments and how to mitigate the side effects, but it just gets worse and worse and more frightening the more you discover (hormone treatment? lymphodema? they don’t tell you about that). I’m a wreck and I feel so trapped.
Hi Calendula 
Oh it absolutely sucks doesn’t it. I was also diagnosed mid June and had my lumpectomy last week.
Sometimes I have to stop myself from reading as it gives me more anxiety and I find things to worry about that I may never need to worry about.
I found at the beginning that the whole thing felt so out of my control and I find that concept generally scary. For me surgery has helped me a little more to accept what is happening as it’s like the first thing ticked off the list. Up until that point it can feel like such limbo because nothing is happening, you know you have cancer and you’re just sitting around waiting for treatment to begin. Does it feel like that for you?