Finally starting radiotherapy. Why am I not feeling happier?

Going through breast cancer treatment Radiotherapy
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Hi lovely ladies.

Hope this rotten rainy day finds you all ok ?

I’ve had a bit of a rollercoaster of a journey which started last July with a mammogram find!

To cut a long story short I’m now over WLE , Lymph node clearance,  query over need for chemo. Another biopsy , another infection and third date set for radiotherapy to finally start tomorrow .

I should be feeling ecstatic that the final leg is about to start but instead I’m feeling…I don’t really know,  a bit scared , a bit is this really  the final hurdle.

I know I shouldn’t beat myself up but I just thought I would be feeling more positive. 

I am eternally grateful to have all you out there to sound off to .I am sure one of you will have felt how I am at the moment. It’s just nice to be able to be truly honest instead of the fake " I’m fine " smile that has become a permanent fixture over the past 8 months xx

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Hi Nikkit

Its perfectly normal to feel the way you are. 

I was diagnosed last May 18, had chemo, mastectomy with delayed reconstruction and radiotherapy. 

On my first day of radiotherapy I had a cry in the car park, my cousin took me, she was great, held me while I sobbed. 

I felt much better after, on my last day of Radiotherapy, I wept again, laughed hysterically and then carried on with my day. 

Im cancer free, and every day I say to myself I’m cancer free and smile. 

Lots of love coming your way, take each day as it comes and remember you have got this. 

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