First time poster... surgery or Pregnancy???

Connect to people like me Younger women
1

Hi I’m Sami,

I was diagnosed with stage 1, grade 3 breast cancer in my my right breast in june 2020, had surgery within 3 weeks and then that was followed up by 21 weeks of Chemo and a week of radiotherapy. 

I am now 13 months down the line since treatment ended and i have a massive decision to make. Do I have a child or do I have the Tram flap surgery?

Im 32 this year and i want to be a relatively young mamma, cancer stopped me from doing this 2 years ago however on the other hand I’m insecure about the way i look since my surgery. If i have the surgery first it means a child later down the line. But then if i have a child this year or next and the surgery later, it could mean beimg in hospital when i should be looking after my child. 

I have also found how increasingly jealous I have become of my friends and how they are all moving on with their lives by marriage or babies and i feel like I’m 10 steps behind them because of Cancer. Its selfish i know, but its how i feel and some days i get so low and caught up in the low mood. My partner said i need to focus on just being me and making sure im healthy and then everything will fall into place, as theres no rush. But i just dont see it that way.

I just need some advice, because im really struggling. 

Please help. 

Thanks  Sami . 

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Hi Sami , welcome to the forum . I haven’t been in your position but hopefully some people who have will be along to comment . All I would say is that   you will be able to choose to have reconstruction at any time in the future and plan for child care etc but having children may not be something you can plan as easily and may take a little while to happen . Wishing you the best of luck with whatever your decision is . Jill x

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Hi Sami,

I m Irene, 30 years old, diagnosed with left breast cancer in September 2020, stage 1a, grade 3, no lymph nodes. I got 8 chemos and 21 radiotherapy sessions. 

I really want to be a mommy and I can’t decide if it’s safe to have a baby now or if I should try a little bit later. I have lots of worries About how easily I can get pregnant after all those therapies. 

I think that if I were you, I would just try have a baby and then have a reconstruction… time flies and I think we should try the sooner If it s safe of course. 

Sorry for my English, it’s not my mother language. 

Irene