I’m 31 and I had my single mastectomy last week (I begged for bilateral but they wouldn’t remove the other before chemo and radiotherapy). It was only a week ago and I’ve been OK for a week but now I’m freaking out. I cannot wear my softee, I’m a H cup and I look like a carry-on sketch, it gets in my way when I reach for things and just feels horrible. It’s the same size as my other breast but it just feels wrong. I’ll wear a bra without a softee and see how it goes but I would love to hear how people are coping with their prosthetics?
I’m an active person, I ride a motorbike, I go horse riding when I can afford to. I was planning to run another half marathon this year (obviously not now, perhaps the year after chemo, rads and yet more surgery). If any one breasted women out there have been able to jog with their prosthetic or do an aerobics class or something please let me know?
Also, anyone went without the softee or prosthetic completely?
Hi Charlie31. I had a single mx on 26/11. I also found wearing a bra and softie uncomfortable and still do if it’s for longer than a couple of hours. The skin on my chest is stretched very tight and feels like bad sunburn, so I mostly wear a stretchy top with inbuilt bra shelf at home and out walking the dog. I’m a DD cup, so the remaining boob needs some support In fact, on the way back from my walk yesterday afternoon I popped into the post office to send a parcel and only realised when I walked out that I was lop-sided! This was quite a moment for me as the first day I was on my own at home after the op I panicked when the doorbell rang as I didn’t have a prosthesis on, but now I really don’t care if other people are bothered by it.
I was very active before the endless tests and op messed with my usual gym routine and began to fear I would never get back to ‘normal’. Then, about 11 days post op I began to feel much more myself and I’m delighted to report that I did a step class on Thursday and Zumba yesterday. It felt so good to be doing something I had chosen! I literally couldn’t wipe the smile off my face I probably could have done something earlier, but I needed to feel comfortable (or at least not uncomfortable) in a sports bra. The softie isn’t ideal for exercise as it soaks up sweat and the seams rub slightly under my arm, but it’ll do until I have a fitting for a ‘proper’ prosthesis and can get a more suitable one for exercise. The only issue I have now is getting full movement back in my arm so I can do up and undo my bra myself! Being a larger cup size my bras have the normal bra fastening and a second clip to form a racer back style. I can get my arm up high enough but don’t have the muscle strength yet to do the clip up (I had all my pectoral muscle removed).
I know everyone recovers from surgery at different rates and depending on what the surgery involved, but I’m 51 and able to do pretty much everything I could before, just over 3 weeks post op. I was doing normal household tasks a few days after the mx (which I would have thought impossible straight after surgery!), mainly because it helped to have a purpose and structure to my day. Having said that, there were also some days I had no energy and slobbed on the sofa! I am sure you will get there, C31, but it is still quite early days so just do what you feel comfortable doing. You will know when you are ready to step up the exercise. Good luck xxx
have you come across the group flat friends? The girl who startde that group had a second mastectomy for the same reason.
I am only an A cup so often don’t bother to wear anything post op, 2 months. Will try a stick on prothesis, which sounds like a joke but its free, so why not.
Charlie31 - sorry to hear that you are struggling to come to terms with your mastectomy. It is a strange feeling being lopsided when you have big breasts. Can I suggest that you take a look at the Knitted Knocker charity site. I have just started wearing mine more as I have some discomfort on scar and I am 38FF. They are soft, knitted cotton prosthesis and you can adjust the filling to the size for you.
I also agree that you might find the Flat Friends Facebook group helpful. Lots of ladies all with different stories and bucket loads of advice and support.
Thank you so much for your comments. I have since got a proper prosthesis, a knitted knocker and have joined flat friends. I’m feeling much better about it all and plan to have a bilateral mx after my chemo to even me out. I still can’t believe how little time it takes to come to terms with all of this and I have to say flat friends has probably been the biggest help of all
I’m a 40GG and having a single mastectomy and lymphectomy in March. Just finishing my chemo which has been very hard. Because I have been very poorly on chemo I am only now beginning to get my head around the fact that I will only have one breast. I wanted a double mastectomy but have been told that it will be better for my general health and mobility to just address the cancerous breast now and to consider the other breast when I’m stronger. How am I going to deal with one huge wobbly breast and one crater? I usually wear underwired bras for support. I’m waiting for my pre-op and meeting with the breast care nurse re bras and prothsesis. What questions should I ask her? Will i have to go bra-less while my scar heals? I’m told that my scar will go under my normal breast area and up into the armpit so won’t a bra rub on the scar?
Hi, I’ve just found out that I need to have a single mx after my WLE results didn’t have clear margins. I’m a 34GG so will become a big uniboober. I have to say that the Flat friends Facebook group is incredibly supportive and welcoming. I was helped to come to terms with not having immediate recon by all the supportive women in the group and can thoroughly recommend joining. I’m going to try to live with one breast whilst I go through chemo and radiotherapy. I saw a plastic surgeon who said that he would be happy to reduce my other breast before or even if I didn’t want a recon and I felt reassured by that. I have my mx on 17th March and only then will I know what it’s going to be like. Until then I’m trying to stay positive and enjoy the sun when it shines. Xx
Hiya blossom . I have been wondering about you and the op. I did search the board’s and couldn’t find u.
I actually posted on secondary bone Mets board and was told u were posting here.
I just wanted to say hugs and hope everything works out for u.
Carolyn xxxxx
Hi carolyn. Dunno how i ended up posting on there. Im bloody dangerours on techi stuff. Im ok thanks. Deeply touched by everyones kind thoughts an good wishes. Ive posted today but from my mobile. So no telling where it is!!!. Im still in hospital. had op sat 15 1/2 hrs !!!but had a setback an had to have a second visit as emergency tues 7.30 am another 2 1/2 hr op… So its set me back. But all good at mo. Should be out monday. Its been tougher than I could have ever imagined. They asked me if i had regrets or would go thro it now i no whats involved. I think i probably did get a tougher ride than it should . I looked at them an said NO i have no regrets and YES i would still do it . they looked at each other nodded an seemed happy . Ive been asked to be a model , they run evenings here about 4 times a year for ladies about to undergo mastecomy gives them the chance to see and ask. It would be an honour to give something back. Its now just a waiting game for results. they were supposed to b back on 8th but they wont be. So got appointment for 15th. Hope your doing ok too. love bloss xxxx
Hiya bloss. U r a very brave lady and I salute u for going through so much this week.I can’t remember if u have a young family to look after? Sounds like yr recovery time is going to be quite long too.
Chin up and hugs xxxxxxx
P’s I don’t usually post on these boards as I’m a secondary Mets girl…
Ho carolyn. Nah im no braver than anyone else on here. Everyones brave everyones battle with this poxy desease is personal. Im just bloody stubborn ive watched breast cancer go throu my ex husbands family, watched the lumpectomies the radiotherapies the chemo, watched it return , over 20 yrs Ive watched it. I always knew if it were me, Id have the bloody lot off. I alwaz knew in my gut. Itta come back. So hence my 3 month wait to jump throu the hoops to convince them I knew what i was doing and I knew how bad the op itta be. Which i clearly didnt!!! But althou i listened to everything they said and very carefully weighed up options. My gut was there. So eventually it won. I did wonder if id pushed my luck a little to far as i was being ran to theatre on tues morning. But I never once even when i told the poor nurse trying to get me off the bed when i was in agony throu the night waiting for theatre in the morning that it was inhumane, I never once regretted my decision. The surgeons are marvellous skilled an dedicated, but they leave us to live the life they decicde is best for us. maybe if id had normal sized boobs not HH cup, maybe id have given the lumpectomy an radiotherapy a go. But i wasnt so id alwaz gotta have an op on my so called uneffected breast anyway. I wait to see what the lab results say when theve ploughed their way thro the two lumps of breast tissue theve removed each weighing 2 kilo each!!!For me it was a case of get em off. And reconstruct. I didnt care what size i ended up. But yes they have done an amazing job. Yeh their always an my stomach gonna be numb. And yeh ive no nipples. Well i mite have em reconstructed in 6 months to a yrs time. But does it matter? Im not brave their are far bigger battles out there with far younger women with surgeons although dedicated think they no best who will have far longer battles tham me. Yeh mine was horriffic the pain far worse than words can describe and yeh i had to go back for a second op. But thats it. Its done. No radiotherapy no symptoms of radiotherapy. Im not sure yet about chemo. Its unlikely but who bloody nos im back with the rest of the HMSWAITING GAME ship. For me it was the only way. Its been a week outta my life and probably 12 getting back to strength. But i came through it. Everyone on here is brave. For me this forum has been the positive of breast cancer. Total strangers bonded by a common fear all at different stages and all there for each other. This time last year I was preparing for my youngest 21 yr olds surprise birthday party. Who have guessed a yr later id be posting this on this forum from my hospital bed having undergone 18hrs of surgery. Its a bloody epedemic the senior plastics nurse here. Nurse Rachett!!! we came to an understanding. She is actually ok. She said the youngest she had had is 20 4 months ago. She is the one thats asked me to be a model for prespective mastectomy patients to come to their evenings to show an tell. To best help prepare them. it would be an honour to give something back. But this forum has made me many wonderful friends and all our journeys are personel an shocking. You lot have got me throu. Our partners and husbands are amazing too, but their bloody clueless in shock they dont no so they go with doctors. The soctors look at what they are dealing with not the whole person We think well were relying on them cos weve stopped thinking. I was lucky i had the time it was a gamble but good old gut feelings. But in ur head cancers running all through your body. I spoke to my ex suster in law. She ended up with a mastectomy but is flat. She had the lumps the radiotherapy the chemo endured all that then ended up with mastectomy She hates how she looks. it cost her her marriage well its what she puts it down to anyway. I had a chance of failure. im not outta woods yet but im in a better place for sucess. Its just my way. Ive misssd you all.
sending love to everyone Bloss (ha im gonna have to b called bloody typoo soon)xxxx
Hi diddy. Excuse the spelling mistakes wording ect. I think i left my brain in recovery. RADIOTHERAPY see!!! can alter the effect of the breast which is why they probably want to get u throu that b4 reconstruction. Perhaps then u could have the uneffected breast reduced to match reconstructed one. Us heavy boobed ladies are considered lucky by our smaller friends. If only they knew hey!!!. Having previously been HH obviously not now ( thank god) ive bin fitted post op with a sports bra. These r obviously r a new revelation to me i imagine post op ud be able to put whatever u were using to pad out the mastected side and otta be quite securley held. The one they gave me aslso has an expander included as post op ur swollen. My husband ordered me a couple as the 1 ive bin given is obv not gonna be enough i have to wear it day an nite for 6 weeks. They arnt cheap about £42 each. but theve no wire. let me no if u want the name nake ect might help they have a lot of support but are soft. Wishing you good luck for surgery.
love bloss xxx
Hiya blossom …can’t believe after all that surgery and stuff u have not only posted on this board but a epic message to your strong feelings and I still say u r brave …big decision to take that surgery on and I’m sending lots of hope and hugs that u don’t need chemo after all this as u are going to need yr strength to recover over the next few weeks. Hopefully u have a strong support team around u to help u out. Forget dust, ironing and housework for as long as u can.
I usually lurk on secondaries board but will keep popping in here to c yr progress.
Once again big hugs xxxxxx
Hi Bloss, I know having heavy breasts isn’t all wine & roses is it? The plastics surgeon said that he would do a reduction in the other breast if I wanted & I think I’ll consider that. He might even do that before any recon if I can’t cope with being so lopsided. He also works at the Royal Free so maybe I’ll get to try out one of those private rooms one day!! I’d be interested to find out the names of the bras you’re getting. I’ve already got my softie ready for putting in my bra after the op. I hope your recovery continues well and that you’ll soon be home. Xx
Hi diddy… ROYAL FREE GO THERE its 70 miles from us. In 15 trs theve only had 1 failure. Both my plastic surgeons consultants work within NHS. I was just fortunate to be a tiny cog in a big company that provides private health care to employees.We not rich or posh im just ur normal woman in the supermarket m&co an new look!!! I was on high dependency for 4 days on NHS as private dont have the experience to cope with the imeadiate aftercare. id rather be on a bay than my room. They were beyond amazing ALL OF THEM. Not one indifferent person whether they were cleaner tea lady health support worker or nurse or sister. Ask for it. wonder who uve got. The bra is ANITA product code 5521 006 im wearing an E cup but im still swollen so will probably go down to DD. They told us to go thro Amazon cos they were cheaper. Hubbie didnt search to c if he could get em anywhere else he just did it. Think he said they were £42 amazingly comfortable tho. If u want any tips ive gleened about what to take in just ask. GOOD LUCK LOVELY.
love Bloss xxx
Hi Bloss, thanks for the info about all this stuff. I’m going day by day at the moment and have to get through mx, chemo & radio before I can think about recon. But great to know that you’ve had top treatment at Royal Free. I’m going to look up those bras too. Xx
In fact, on the way back from my walk yesterday afternoon I popped into the post office to send a parcel and only realised when I walked out that I was lop-sided! This was quite a moment for me as the first day I was on my own at home after the op I panicked when the doorbell rang as I didn’t have a prosthesis on, but now I really don’t care if other people are bothered by it. 
I probably could have done something earlier, but I needed to feel comfortable (or at least not uncomfortable) in a sports bra. The softie isn’t ideal for exercise as it soaks up sweat and the seams rub slightly under my arm, but it’ll do until I have a fitting for a ‘proper’ prosthesis and can get a more suitable one for exercise. The only issue I have now is getting full movement back in my arm so I can do up and undo my bra myself! Being a larger cup size my bras have the normal bra fastening and a second clip to form a racer back style. I can get my arm up high enough but don’t have the muscle strength yet to do the clip up (I had all my pectoral muscle removed).