getting married while having treatment

Hi There
I am new to the post but have felt alot of reassurance from many posts on this website.
I have had a lumpectomy and a week and a half ago I went through another op as they hadn’t got clear margins.
I am going back for my results on Friday to get the results and hoping and praying that I won’t need anymore ops but just treatment. The consultant has said that I will definitely be having radio for six weeks and theres a question mark as to whether I will need chemo. The problem is I am supposed to be getting married on Saturday 30th March and am now not sure if I will feel well enough to go through with the wedding as well as having the treatment.
Can anyone tell me that went through treatment, how would they have coped, would they have postponed the wedding if it was them or would they have felt like going ahead with it. We have invites and things to send out but just really not sure whether we should postpone the whole thing until all my treatment is over.
Any help or suggestions would be really grateful.


Before you decide I would get results out the way and try and press for an answer regarding chemo. If no chemo then rads won’t be much of a problem as will be done and dusted by your wedding date I would assume. They can also move chemo about slightly and help you out so you are ok for your big day.

Give the BCC helpline a ring I am sure they will have some thoughts on this.

Good luck with your treatment and your wedding. Take care


I agree with Wendy, wait for results before you make a decision. Having had surgery, chemo and radiotherapy, I think you would be fine if you just had radiotherapy. If you have to have chemo you would probably be OK if it was towards the end of a cycle but I wouldn’t have wanted to much in the first week to 10 days of each cycle.

Good luck


Hi Kayforr, as the others have already said, don’t rush to make any decisions, wait to see just what treatment you do need. There have been young women who posted on here who got married during their treatment, even part way through their chemo, and for them it was a goal that helped them stay positive. I’ll have a look and see if I can track down any older threads for you (sh, will have to use the demon google, since the search facility on here is a bit wonky). Also, if you speak to your team, they may be able to juggle dates a little bit so that you would have your wedding in a ‘good’ week.

Hope you get positive news and feel able to go ahead with your plans for the big day

EDIT: A quick look on google only throws up very old threads, Hopefully one of the younger women will along soon and will be able to find the threads for you.

Thank you for your comments it was greatly appreciated. I decided to wait until I got the results and was so pleased to hear from my surgeon that they have got the cancer and I will now need radiotherapy and no chemo. Have spoken to him about what to do with regard to our wedding and he said to chat to oncologist in Feb about it. For the time being we are going to carry on planning. Surgeon said that the oncologist maybe able to work my radio around the wedding.
Will see what oncologist says on 1st Feb
Thanks for your help

Kayfor . Lovely to hear some god news you carry on planning and have a beautiful wedding don’t let this bloody disease spoil tat one

Wendy x x

I echo what Wendy56 says - carry on planning for your wedding. They are BOUND to be able to work rads around it (I go for rads planning on 29th - after WLE 2nd Jan - no further surgery thank goodness as they got it all first shot). I don’t know how time critical the rads therapy is but I would have thought a few weeks either way was no problem.


Think they sould start rads within 31 days of surgery so think you should pretty much start as soon as you have see onc so think maybe you will be finished for wedding. Lets hope so for you

x x

Hi Thanks for all your lovely comments. Saw my oncologist on Friday and she said that as my treatment will be finished about the end of March, there maybe a problem with me feeling really tired. She said she would try and push it through. Had phonecall from radiotherapy team today, they are seeing me on Friday 8th Feb then a little while later I got an in an email with the info on about the Import High trial, she mentioned that my treatment wouldn’t start until 26th Feb and would carry on until 2nd April!!
So I emailed her back explaining that I was planning on getting married at end of March. She was really lovely and has said that she will do her best to get my treatment going a.s.a.p and said that I will be able to have my Big Day, and she will help make that possible. She was so lovely and helpful. Just what I needed to hear. But wow what a rollercoaster of emotions, from this morning thinking that the wedding may have to be cancelled to this afternoon knowing that I will be able to go ahead with the day.

Just one thing to add - you can start your rads later or earlier, but you can’t have a break in the middle - even for a day. Once standard radiotherapy has started it has to be a daily zap. I had to miss my son’s graduation (300 miles away and I couldn’t get there and back in time). So, I’m sure you can fit is around your big day as long as it is planned in advance and doesn’t break the treatment.

Hi - you can miss one day - they rarely do it at weekends for example - and I know lots of people have to miss odd days when the machines break or the transport forgets them. Shame on your unit for not letting you go to your son’s graduation Annie. But I am sure you want to do better than just take a day off Kayforr - you may even want a honeymoon! Really hope it works out, x

Hi my rads were during summer hols and I missed the Bank Holiday out. Would happily have attended as would have finished earlier! Mixed messages from hospitals…

I finished rads just after Christmas. I had to go in Saturday before Christmas then I had Sun, Mon, Tues, Wed off and had last 2 thurs, Fri. Think a lot depends on your hospital.
Bye, Maggie