I’m wondering whether there are any “flatties” here who could share how they made that decision? I know for some it’s an easy decision - for me it isn’t but it just feels like by far the least worst option of all of the ones I have and is hard to feel positive about.
I’m going for surgery next week which is at least a unilateral mastectomy RHS, possibly bilateral or mammoplasty LHS depending on what they find on a final mammogram (looking for calcifications). My boobs are a mess - RHS has at least two possibly three areas of cancer, and LHS has one lobular and another area of cancer that was very hard to pin down.
I initially decided on DIEP reconstruction but its such a huge operation which leaves even more scarring and will delay treatment and I really don’t want to anymore. I find myself thinking more and more I should go flat as that seems to have the least painful outcome, and good for the types of exercise I do. Implants don’t appeal because they could interfere with radio and I know they can feel very odd, cold and tight.
I’m struggling with the self-image side of being flat though. I have seen some amazing women who have made this a positive journey for them and I think I need to see that some more.
Hiya, well I had double mastectomy flat close on 3rd December obviously its very new and I sore and swollen especially under my arms but I 100% made the right decision.
It sounds like you have got more problems than I had but my decisions for having a flat close are,
I had cancerous DCIS in my right and benign DCIS in my left i had both off for fear of reoccurrence and also primarily because I need to stay on HRT
I feel for me the benefits of staying on HRT out weigh the risks, protection against osteoporosis, dementia and heart disease I witnessed the pain my mum went through for 14 years before she died of pancreatic cancer and her quality of life suffered.
The staying flat choice was because I wanted an easier recovery, shorter surgery, less infection risk. I didnt want pain from other areas of my body with a DIEP and I didn’t want a foreign object in place of my boobs. I had big boobs and I felt at 58 they’ve fed my babies so I dont need then and their gonna try kill me anyway. Pluses I can wear clothes ive never been able too which is a bonus to me and my partner is very supportive of my choice.
I hope this gives you some food for thought and if you want to chat more send me a message xx
It’s not an easy decision to make. In the beginning because I didn’t know what was involved with any of the surgery options I thought I wanted a DIEP.
They told me implants were not an option for me as I had previously had radiotherapy. They gave me an appointment with a reconstruction surgeon to discuss what’s involved with each sort so that I could make an informed choice. For me I wanted a one and done surgery so once I found out a DIEP would not be that it made the decision for me, to then go flat.
I have to say, it was the best decision for me! I never wanted to lose my boobs obviously but knowing I had to, going flat made me feel more comfortable in myself. The only thing I’m not keen on is having a Pooh bear stomach but that’s down to me and the menopause and so hopefully overtime I’ll be able to do something about that.
I hope another perspective will help you weigh up the pros and cons for you and lead you to a decision. If you have any other questions though I’m more than happy to answer them if I can.
Hi I have had a single mastectomy on the 3rd Dec, was due to have the DIEP but a tumour on my kidney was found during a pre op CT scan so I want to heal and recover as quick as poss before embarking on my kidney op.
I was like you very torn before the decision was taken away from me as I am a very active person so the DIEP could of changed things up for me and what I do if there had of been any issues, so I am really happy with my one boob and how my recovery is going, as everyone says though its your body, I wasn’t much of a fan of my boobs to start with so I am honestly really happy with my flat choice.
Thanks so much for the replies! In some ways this might be easier if I knew exactly what I was facing - surgery on Weds and I still don’t really know what they will suggest for the LHS. How do you mentally prepare? Right now I just know getting cancer out has to go first, but I am very scared I will not cope well psychologically for a while.
Hiya, im not sure anything really prepares you for how your gonna feel, I got quite tearful the first time I had my dressings off and I’m apprehensive about seeing my flat close actually in the flesh next week, im taking my daughter with me to hold my hand, I didnt expect to be as upset as i was and I couldn’t look last week. It’s a strange feeling but just keep in mind why your doing it, its cancer and it needs to be gone and you need to think about what your priorities are around that and you make the right decision for you. Xx
I hope the surgery went well and you feel ok physically and emotionally.
I had a mastectomy earlier in the year and am going for elective mastectomy early next year for the second one (Chek2 gene brings me moderate risk of another occurrence). I have gone through a grieving process for my first breast as you’d expect I wouldn’t have chosen this path but it’s the right one and what I have to do. I have chosen to stay flat (flat closure) for these reasons:
I don’t want any additional surgery on top of what I have to have
I don’t feel comfy with a foreign body (implant)
I don’t trust monitoring methods such as mammogram/MRI which failed me previously.
Staying flat for me means I can see any future changes better (self monitoring), if I was to have a false breast of any kind I felt this may hide any recurrence or make it more difficult.
I’m F/G cup so a prothesis is cumbersome. I’ll have a choice whether to wearing nothing at all if I am exercising or indeed wear a padded bra smaller size if I want to dress up.
Having the second one done will also give me alignment and be easier for me.
I think as humans we adapt quickly. Of course I am expecting a grieving process for the second one, but I believe all my reasons are valid, I am hoping I will have a sense of relief as the prothesis I am using is a real faff and not overly comfy. Now I am taking the leap of faith to not only have the second one done but to stay flat as being right for me. I wouldn’t have chosen this in a million years but given my predicament and in order to reduce my risk as much as possible, and to have as few procedures as possible, this is the way for me. I am lucky my husband has been super supportive in this decision and agrees this is the right path for me. It will be different, it will take some adjustment but I am not a women dictated to by the media and society’s perception of what a woman should look like. We are not defined by our body shape. Have you seen the Flat Friends website worth a look if not.
I had my surgery yesterday - full mastectomy on the right and therapeutic mammoplasty on the left (fingers crossed they got good margins!!). In the end I feel nothing but relief that I didn’t wait another month to 6 weeks for the reconstruction and huge op. I’ve managed to look down without freaking out, but have a support bra on now so can’t have another look.
It will take some adjustment over time but I feel very strongly that for my health it was the right choice. It’s crazy to think how quickly I have made the mental journey for this and I know it’s a long road ahead. Delayed reconstruction is still an option if I struggle.
Good morning, I hope you are feeling ok or as well as you can be! Please reach out if you want to compare notes or have any questions, im 2 wks and 2 days post surgery now so a bit ahead of you.
Three days in and today I feel more tired than yesterday, but hardly any pain. I do have a bit of fluid build up (I slosh!!) but I don’t think there is anything sinister to it as there is no pain or heat. I’m not quite sure how you are supposed to determine the difference between a seroma and a natural fluid build up that happens anyway. I’ve got the compression bra and softie in to push down a little. Exercises are fine.
Hey, how you doing today? I agree its so hard to know what is normal! Give your BCN a calm if you’re concerned, I was accosted bit squishy when my dressings came off and my surgeon asked me if I wanted it draining? I opted no as he said it would fill again. Im nearly 3 weeks on and still a bit puffy at the top
I’m doing okay! a few weird nerve things (like a pulsing cold sensation) and sloshing still lol. But it doesn’t seem to be getting worse and I have good mobility in arms. Looking forward to dressings off in a week so I can have a shower!! Just hoping so hard my surgeon got clear margins on the one left so no more surgery
Thanks Ariella! I hope you are getting on okay too.
The fluid is going down (slowly!) and now I am just waiting on the t-junction to heal which is also taking it’s time. I am still wiating on histology/surgery tissue results to know what happens next so I guess no rush
Good morning, I’m so pleased it’s going down! Well I’m 6 weeks post surgery today and feel great, my arm and movement feels amazing (I have been a very good girl with my exercises!) I had my first Oncology appointment yesterday so my chemo should start within the next couple of weeks but I’m feeling good and positive.
Wishing you continued success with your healing and reach out if i can help with anything.
