I think we all agree that there are some horrible days on chemotherapy and I am sure that for most new ladies Reading the forum it is these bits that stick in the mind. However my experience has been that there are also quite a lot of good times even when we are in the midst of treatment. As such I thought it would be a good idea to collect some of these experiences together to give a more balanced view of how the reality of Chemo can be, like a little memory bank to keep us all going. It would help new ladies plus it’s good to look back on your own positive posts when you are feeling a bit rubbish.
So, one of my pleasant days was Saturday, feeling fine and looking ok (with careful make up of course!) and throwing my youngest sons third birthday party. The children all had a fab time, I had made the cake and sorted out pass the parcels etc because I felt well enough to do so, even though I have had 5 of my 6 Chemo sessions. It was lovely catching up with people and feeling more like the old me and a normal mum. Yes I had some pensive moments but on the whole we all had a great time.
I hope other forum members will post their good times whilst on Chemo too. I appreciate that Chemo has been really hard at some stages for me and for others but remembering my own well days has got me through darker days.
Well I have also had 5 out of 6 chemo’s (3 FEC & 2 TAX so far)and whilst I agree some of the days have not been so good, I have actually had quite a good summer (I would otherwise have worked all summer). I have 2 children 8 and 11 and last weekend we camped in the pouring rain (so very very liberating). I am really a hotel kind of girl but hey got to give everything a go haven’t you?
We had a fabulous time got very cold/wet but we don’t melt, set a little camp fire and had a ball, visited the beach and paddled/swam in the very cold water, collected shells and melted marshmellows over our fire.
Great fun and a nice change to a week or 2 in Spain (oh I wish!!!)
Not long to go now for me and my children tell me that my illness has not made a difference to their summer (which i was worried about)
Good luck to all, I can’t beleive how fast it has all gone and look forward to getting my hair back
Fantastic thread Vickie,
Too many frightening stories about peachy mother (chemotherapy)
Yes some people have a rough time, but as Vickie says we don’t hear about the ones that get through chemo without too many problems.
I consider myself one of those that are getting through chemo without too many side effects. Yes l have had a couple of mouth ulcers, and a sore throat, and perhaps a little bit of an ache here and there! Oh yes not forgetting the feeling of sickness, but we get medication for that, and touch wood so far l have not been sick, so they work for me! To me it is made worse by the fact it is chemo!! if l had a cold l could accept these problems so much easier, so to me it is the fear that makes me feel worse! l know a bit Psychosomatic!
l have had 3 x FEC and my first TAX on friday 13th! but no worries there! and yes still a bit to go!
I have found my FEC not too bad at all, probably the worse for me is the tearful days about 5/7 days after peachy mother! BUT l make sure around these days are filled with my grandchildren! They are my life, so for any grandma’s/nan’s out there, l hope you have the love that comes with your grandchildren. Just seeing their smiling faces gives me the strength to get through this bc.
To those that have no children/grandchildren then surround yourself with those you love in between your not so good days.
I know a lot of ladies have dogs/cats and other animals, l also have two dogs, just going for a walk with them is a breath of fresh air!
Well two days before my peachy mother, and today l am off to see my grandchildren for another fun packed day! teaching my grandson to ride his bike without his stabilisers, could be fun!
Drink plenty (sorry, not alcohol!) eat little and often!
Lots of Hugs and Love to all you ladies
Sandra xxx
Hey. I went to 4 weddings through out my chemo last year, one being 2 days after the 4th dose. I felt a little rough, wobbley, dizzy sweaty etc etc but fine enough to go see my loved ones marry.
Chemo does suck and i wasnt well enough to have my 6th but realistically right up until 10 days after my 5th i managed to look after my 1 and 2 yr old. The house fell apart. I didnt cook as hated eating but otherwise we bumbled along!
Its “doable” is a common phrase and yeah it is. Makes everything smell weird tho and certain toilet cleaners still give me panic attacks because they smell like chemo!
Hi what a good idea Vickie, its so easy to focus on the bad days and to be honest like most people those days are the minority - its just the ones we tend to talk about (on here anyway, as thats the nature of the threads…).
I have had many many good times whilst on Chemo - like you say its not that bad and I have ‘functioned.’ I will go for Today as one specific example! I am on day 7 of chemo cycle (last Tax) so i decided to book a days holiday (basically cause I thought I would be feeling a bit poorly) NOT SO… I am top of the world, got up really early did the washing and hung out a beautiful sunny warm day here in Midlands.
Then went out to supermarket and bought some really nice things to make a lamb goulash for dinner (love it!) wandered around the supermarket for ages, browsing… and then thought would go to garden centre, again wanderered around and looked at plants, arrangments, ponds etc etc very vey relaxing - even sat on a bench and had an ice cream! Came home, sat in the garden and had a bacon sandwich and started to read one of my books where I stayed until just popping in to tend to my farm (Farmville (facebook)- I got one in January in those dark days of diagnosis and tests!!
Obviously everyone else is either on holiday or at work at the moment so I am on my own but this time on my own (my time) is probably the first I have had for a long long time and I have really really enjoyed it. it may sound a bit mundane but its been great- I will get started on the goulash in a minute!! let you know how it goes…
good luck with the TaX on thursday Sandra you will be fine!
good luck with your last Chemo too Vickie (I am sure it will be the ‘last’ one) and well done! xxxxxxx
Thanks ladies,
These anecdotes are just what us waiting for chemo need to hear as I am just expecting a phonecall to arrange my first dose anytime now and am nervous, to say the least.
Keep the happy times coming,
Sallyann X
Such a good idea of a reminder of happy days - they do tend to get burried! It’s good to hear what everyone else enjoys, often the simpler things in life I note.
I had a lovely afternoon and evening 9 days after my first AC. I had an afternoon nap with our daughter, then all three of us went down to the seafront. We went to the fairground and LO went on the merry-go-round, and then all on board a swan-pedelo, and rounded off with fish and chips on the beach, just a few feet away from the sea, evening sun shining on us, seagulls asking for chips! It was such a lovely evening. Even though I was feeling grim with cold, I managed to thoroughly enjoy myself. LO was knacked, had an early night, and OH and I watched a film
Let’s hope that happy days exist right to the bitter end.
Vicki This is a really great idea. So often we hear the negative about chemo but life does go on and there are good times too. I worked through my chemo ( was lucky enough to have manageable s/e and I am single and do not have anyone else to look after eg young children)I tried to have enjoyable things set up to look forwards to. I had just started learning to play golf when Dx last Dec. I managed always to get to lessons/driving range/ golf course and my 2 lovely golfing partners were always supportive and said @ Shall we do normal to-day? So whilst acknowledging my BC encouraged some normality for me tooSometimes my game was so poor that I think I went for the walk lol I cannot blame chemo for that))).Indeed it has been BC which has really brought home to me what lovely friends I have. I live miles from my family. We celebrated 3 birthdays with a trip to London to the Theatre for 2 of them and a BBQ and party in the garden for the 3rd. OK just normalish things but so enjoyable. Enjoying my grand-sons was a paricular pleasure as I live a long way from them so they came to see me more often.18 weeks of my life not long when you say it quickly but as is so often said on here doable.Well done Vicki on your last Tax and Good Luck on Fri Sandra Good Luck to everyone. Jackie
This chemo malarky has brought out the best in my husband. Any lingering resentment I had about not being properly tended to while pregnant, and vomiting and looking after a toddler, has been blown away by his care and attention during my illness. My special day might seem like a weird choice… the first time I was admitted to hospital for an infection was a couple of weeks ago, it was 8pm, I had a high temperature and was feeling sick and in pain. I kept telling my husband to go home as he was working the next day but he insisted on staying until I was admitted to the ward. He sat beside me until 3.30am when they finally found me a bed. We chatted gently, read a bit, joked a bit and he held my hand. I felt totally cared for and loved and I will remember it when the bad times are all forgotten.
(and no, it wasnt just the morphine!)
Naomi
Really enjoyed reading your posts everyone. I have had chemo twice - in 2004 and again in 2008. Both times there were some great days - two that spring to mind are after my 2nd chemo in 2004 was my husband’s degree day. I proudly watched him presented with his degree and went to a strawberry and cream tea party afterwards. It was a beautiful day and I felt great! In 2008 after chemo #5 we went away for 3 nights to a lovely hotel in Sunderland - even though it was November! It was great to “get away” not just from home but also from feeling like a patient. I really enjoyed it even though we didn’t do very much.
These were very special times and I remember them very fondly. Chemo does not mean that good times don’t happen.
Hiya we live in Portsmouth and every round of chemo on the good week we go to Ryde on the Isle of Wight. It has miles of sandy beach and wonderful shallow water for the kids to play in. We catch the hover and just spend the day walking along the beach and playing with the children and dog. We all go,even the dog and it’s a day to just be us, like we used to be. xxx
My thoughts about something good are a little different. There have been special days but something that has really lifted me is that my duaghters friends Mum had a baby 3 days after my dx. I didn’t know her that well then but she has been a great support. Every day when I was well enough we walked the girls to school and then had a stroll round the village chatting about everything and anything.Very rarely talked about cancer and that was so refreshing. Have loved watching her gorgeous little girl go from a helpless little baby to a smiley cute 9 month old.
On days when I wasn’t well enough she took Mary and brought her home so I didn’t have to worry.
However I felt she was there for me and listened to my hopes and fears and always brought a smile to my face. She is now a truly special friend.
Just wanted to add my experience too. Last year I had 6 x FEC chemo, and although my veins got knackered pretty quickly, that got sorted out with a PICC line. I’m the world’s biggest coward and was terrified before my first FEC, but was fortunate not to feel more than just a wee bit iffy for a day or 2, was never sick, and continued to work part-time throughout my treatment. I know of others who felt even better than I did with absolutely no side-effects, and I hope that those who are waiting to start their chemo will take some comfort from that. By the way, I relied on chemo scarves for a while to cover my balding head, but once I started to experiment with lots of woolly hats, I discovered that I really like some styles of them, and now have a small collection of hats that I would never have worn before and which I love.
I think theres a bit of a theme developing here. The biggest comfort seems to come from the times we feel NORMAL and can do ordinary things like go to the supermarket and be around our friends and family (saffronseed I can so relate to your day). I think I have learned something from this period of my life.
Sorry to make you cry Jane! Bit emotional myself at times- not such a surprise I guess!
Excellent idea, this thread Vickie, well done.
For those who don’t follow my adventure I just wish to share my holiday with you. Before I had my diagnosis, I booked a very special holiday in South Africa for a safari, we had been many times before as a family with my husband, but this time it was different as he died in May 2009. This time it was with my 2 sons and older one’s girl friend. OMG, I thought cannot let them down, can we still go ? My onc said “yes” and we worked the chemo around the dates. With ash cloud and strikes looming in the back ground, I was terrified that I would not get there, or even worse not get back in time for my chemo. The angels took care of us all and we had a wonderful time and not a hitch in sight. So girls be brave and don’t give up on your plans.
Maria x
Thanks for this thread Vickie. It has brought me some peace of mind. I have just heard that my first chemo will be 2 weeks today and I am feeling very scared. All the stories on this thread have helped to make me feel that there is nothing to be scared about. Thank you to all you lovely ladies and best wishes to you all for your future treatment.
I had many good days during chemo, and only a few rough ones.
The very best day was inbetween my first and second chemos, April 10th, when we had our Civil Partnership. It was such a lovely day - from 9am until 3am the next day, with my wonderful partner and three fantastic friends. We laughed a lot, cried a little, ate, drank and partied the day away! We even got a hug from Christopher Biggins when he came over to ask what we were celebrating during our champagne breakfast!
My family and friends have been fantastic throughout my treatment, and it’s definitely made me realise who and what is important in my life.
Yes, chemo can make you feel rubbish some days, but life, love and friendship carries on, so enjoy it!
We moved house just after my op in Feb and then stripped the new place down to first fix downstairs for a full scale renovation all through Chemo from April till July, the house was full of builders, no kitchen, mess everywhere! So pretty much everything I would have done anyway got done! My boys showed real resilience and as a family we definitely know what counts for us. I am quietly proud and feel like saying “I have done it” despite all the problems along the way!
