Hi all,
well had my chemo today not too bad again cos they again warmed it for me !! ( and they remembered too ! ).
Anyway after I had finished there I went to visit my nephew Marc he is really disabled with cerebal palsy ( he’s 22 now ) but he is having some problems with his breathing , so they are doing some tests on his heart .
Then after I saw Marc ( I didn’t stay long cos I went yesterday and I am also going tomorrow ) we went to get Betty ( well Steve did while I tidied up a bit and made a shopping list .
Then when we settled Betty ( wasn’t that hard she’s always asleep! )
we went shopping to Wilko’s to get Betty a bed and some toys but they never had a bed we were already going to Tesco so went there and they never had a bed either ! so then we ended up going to the pet shop we like to use ( where we get our hamsters from ) and we eventualy got a bed for her ! phew , so she can sleep in it tonight safe & sound.
We made a appointment for her to get her first jab ( next week to give her time to settle ).
Then went in bath and been banished to bedroom ! ( charming I know but I have my laptop and my sky channels and I am drinking grapefruuit juice.
Just seen an news alert a helicopter has ditched in north sea wonder if it’s near here? I only said to Steve last week I wonder how old that helicopter is ( it’s used as a taxi to get to the rigs ).
how strange if it’s the one ?? right im going to see if it is the taxi, been watching Britawards ( take that were really good ) as was kylie ( she wasn’t singing but shes good anyway ! )
love Caron
ps I dont feel sick really ( fingers crossed )
I can start worry about TAX now can’t I ??
I already suffer with cold hands & feet hope my toes don’t drop off!
the helicopter was in scotland not in Cleethorpes ! ( was going to go & see it too ! )
BY THE WAY Jade Goody’s new chapter is on tomorrow on Living not sure what time though.poor poor girl.
Well I’m still wide awake ( must be the steriods? )
I have got to go to hospital for a appointment for my ear as it has been damaged by numerous Abcess’s ( 2 at once one time ! ) anyway I have to wear a hearing aid , but I don’t feel alone cos Chloe wears one too ! lol.
So Ive got that to do and I have to pick my steriods up for the tax that were not ready today. seem to spend most my life there now !
right I have probably bored you all silly now so i’m off night night xxxxxx caron xxxxx
Dear all,
Met my surgeon yesterday and she was absolutely lovely. I’m still terrified, but she is going out of her way to find ways to calm me down. My date is Monday 16th March(just after monster’s party!) and I have to be there at 7.30am as she will do me first (!) so I don’t get to think about it for too long. She also wants to try to get me into a sideroom as she thinks that will calm me down. The ward is just for breast surgery people anyway…so is smallish. It all feels very unreal at the moment…to be talking about losing a breast like it’s an everyday thing. Don’t think I’ve really thought through everything yet. On the plus side, she was pleased with how the breast felt…so maybe Tax has done something after all!! It is my last chemo on Tuesday and I feel like I’m going to be venturing out into really scary land after living in foggy town for so long!!
Andie - very impressed with your walking. I get absolutely knackered and breathless now. When we went for a walk in the snow a few weeks back…thought my pal was going to have to run back for her car!!! Well done you!
Caron and Bright - hope you’re feeling OK.
Jo - my salt and sugar intake has gone way up! I am planning to get through all this treatment and have a look at what’s happened to my stomach in the Summer!!! (Mind you I might need a good tummy for reconstruction!!!)
Anyone heard from Shell? She has gone too quiet. Hope she is OK!
Gail, worry I will pass the message on to Betty , Owen slept on the settee last night as he didn’t want to leave her alone and I didn’t want to put her in the kitchen with my moggies as Binny would BOB himself !( he’s scared of everything that cat even carrier bags?, I don’t know why cos he was born in a barn with a load of other moggies, but I do now realize where the term scaredy cat comes from.
Does anyone know if they have to stop your periods? as I am getting mixed messages ( from my nurse )
I said to her " is it the intention to stop the periods??? or is it just a side effect???
so she said " Its just a side effect"
So I then said " oh I thought it was to do with the hormones, & every time I get mine I think oh no "
She then said " if your still having them now it’s unlikely they will stop now, you might have to have a injection into your stomach to stop them ! !!!
Hence the mixed messages , so I am still no wiser !
She is very lovely lady but I feel like she is saying what she thinks I want to hear? and she still says my notes have not been updated on computer thats why she can’t tell me about her2 .
I slept rubbish last night ! I couldn’t sleep and then I thought someone was trying to break into the garden ( as Jordan’s moped is in there well there are 2 motorbikes in there and the moped has been robbed out the garden twice! and when Jamie had it he was coming home when 2 chavs robbed it off him down the street with a screw driver!!
I wouldn’t want to incriminate myself on here but me & Steve went out looking for them and found one we would have caught the other one only he seemed to jump from the bike in mid air ( still don’t know where he went? ) needless to say they won’t be doing that again ! especially when I hit him with Jamie’s helmet!!!lol
Oh all good times ! then like I say it got robbed out the garden twice the first time they spent nearly all night getting my locks off my gate! ( I had them on video but of course it’s never good enough for police )
then another time about 6 months later.
Just spoke to Victoria her boss is going to cheer her up by taking her for sushi ( she can’t have !) and she is taking her to guys hospital lol ( im sure she doesn’t like you Victoria ! ) lol
laters caron xx
In answer to your question about periods, I think the injection they are on about is Zoladex. You get it once a month and they inject a pellet into your stomach area and it’s something to do with shutting ovaries down. My periods stopped after my first lot of chemo in Aug 07 and have never returned - early menopause from the chemo. But when they did a blood test last Sept, I was found to be mid-cycle so technically not menopausal at all but need the injection to be able to have my arimidex (some others have it with tamoxifen). My age (I’m 44 now) makes me borderline - oh joy !! If you do get to the stage where you get the zoladex, ask them to give you Emla cream - it’s an anaesthetic cream you apply to the area where you are going to have the jab about an hour before and you don’t feel a thing. Plus the 2 and a half stone I’ve put on has helped give plenty of fat for them to use !!!
My op results i received on Tuesday were a bit shocking,hense i have been a little quiet…
When the surgeon removed my tumor she also took 22 lymph nodes, 19 of the nodes contained cancer…
As my body rejected the chemo my surgeon says cancer is likely to still be in my system. She has told me i will probably get a secondary cancer in one of my organs within the next 2 years and that there will be non cure just treatment to prolong my life…If i dont get a secondary in 2 years she said i will be a lucky girl…
I have to be vigilant of any aches/pains, changes in my body and get things checked out that dont seem right.
I wasnt expecting this kind of news and wasnt prepared for what i heared.Im gutted,speachless and scared.
Hi, Shell, sorry to jump in here, but I think you might find it a bit more positive to read “how many of your lymph nodes were affected”, also under ‘newly diagnosed’.
I had a mastectomy in November, half-way through chemo at the mo., and then have to have full lymph node removal after chemo., as when they did mastectomy the 5 nodes they removed all had cancer, so after the chemo blast, rest will be removed (keep repeating myself here!), then have to have radiotherapy and drugs.
However, all my scans before the chemo started were all clear, and I think - even though the docs are obviously the experts - there are some who insist on giving you the worst possible scenario when there really is no need to scare the living hell out of you. Some of them have no idea of what they are doing to our brains, before our bodies have even got over the op shock.
Please take each day as it comes, we’re all here today, the tomorrows can look after theirselves. Please, please don’t let them worry you - in all probability - unnecessarily.
Take care, I know it’s easy to say, but worrying will do nothing to help you or those around you. xx Jacq xx
To Shelly I second what Jac says , like I say something may be in the pipeline as we speak ? I hope so I do hope you won’t worry yourself silly ( I bet you will though ! ) You deserve nothing but the best, all my thoughts are with you Shell xxxxlove & hugs Caronxxx
Shell - and I agree with Jacuqi and Caron. And different consultants say different things. My oncologist does not like talking about odds becuase he says - even if they are good you can still fall into the tiny less good reality. And the forums are full of people who have survived for years when medics had written them off.
Stay strong for your sons - and we are all here to help.
I had quite a good day at work today as my boss took me out for lunch to a Turkish cafe, and managed to stay awake during my meetings. But this evening I do feel tired and slightly nauseous again. Though I hope it passes soon.
Gail the surgery will be fine. It is the easy part - and so envious that you are about to have your last chemo.
Well did you all watch Jade?
wish I hadn’t now.It’s so depressing watching her fading like that,
I can hardly bring myself to talk to OH now.
Lizcat thanks for advice on jabs ( maybe they will stop ?)
I am so tired today after my steriod night last night and I don’t think I will sleep much tonight either?
well Jamie came to see the new doggy (Betty) Emmsies (as I call her)wants to take her home !
I managed to get my steriods for my Tax ready for when I start that .
I am gonna try & get some sleep ( or not get up tomorrow?).
Andie see you can change your pic !!
Bright hope your sickness goes soon I know it can hang around try and get some rest too.
I didn’t watch Jade. Bless her, I feel so sorry for her, and I wouldn’t for a moment criticise what she’s doing - not only for her boys, but in smashing down some of the taboos. And inadvertantly promoting cervical smears! I just hate it seeing her on the front pages all the time, reminding me…
I missed the bit about your new dog, Caron. I have a large and stupid Afghan (actually the “stupid” goes without saying for an Afghan) and a small and very fierce Yorkie who’s fifteen years old, nearly blind, nearly deaf, but would fight any other dog in the park given a fraction of a chance! It’s lovely to cuddle them when you’re feeling ropey.
I have drove the car into town today and feel alot better now im mobile again.
My hubby is taking me out tolunch to the pub today cant wait…think i might have a steak…Yum.
My hubby is seeing a councillor at the mo at work because he needs to talk to somone about how hes feeling.He gets very upset talking about my results and needs to speak to someone other than me or his parents.
hope your feeling less sick now caron.
Bright- I wish my boss would take me out to lunch…you must be special.
Afternoon ladies,
well Betty (spaghetti as steve calls her!) has been a naughty girl!
She was chasing a leaf! which was in my water feature in back garden she got all wet ! and started whimpering ! so Steve brought her up to me anyway she has bitten my brand new red satin quilt cover so she’s pulled it a bit ( never mind ) we didn’t tell her off then she bit my wire to mt laptop ! ( does she want a electric shock ??)
Anyway Steve has taken her down now to go on the rampage downstairs!.
I have to go & look at Chlo’e pc now as Jamie has mended it ( I hope he hasn’t broken it worse!! ) the motherboard won’t find 1/2 the things on it so I am going to have to look at it .
write later love Caron x
Caron now I know how to do it I thought you might like to see a picture of one of my cats. She is probably the naughtiest cat on the planet, and the most accident prone. You know that cats are always supposed to land on their feet - well this one didn’t and broke her foot.On another occassion she got her cat collar caught somehow whilst out and about, and in her mad panic and struggle to get home she ripped all the skin off her neck.
How are you feeling following your lastest chemo?
Yes I did watch Jade last night and wished I hadn’t, then I watched ER which also featured Dr. Green when he was dealing with cancer and that made me sad as well, I think I should give up TV for the moment.
I had to go to the dentist yesterday because of a problem with a tooth that has a temporary crown which has been in place since before my chemo started.I was advised, by those who should know, to delay finishing the treatment until my chemo was out of the way. I have been in pain for a few days- evidently the crown has moved just enough to be causing pain but is still secure enough not to be a problem. Unfortunately the dentist says I will just have to live with it until after surgery when she can complete the treatment.Just what I need 6 days before I go into hospital.
It’s important to remember that we all have differing amounts of lymph nodes. Sometimes those with only a few cancerous nodes and a ‘good’ prognosis go on to develop secondaries, likewise others who have many removed due to cancer and a ‘poorer’ prognosis don’t go on to develop secondaries at all. It comes back to the fact that we are all so different even if we have the same dx.
I myself am over 3 years post dx (IBC). Although I am on my third recurrence of skin mets my last CT scan shows the rest of me remains clear of cancer.
Hope you had a lovely lunch with hubby!
Love
Jackie x
Just a few lines tonight s feeling very tired after day at work then evening with former partner and cat.
Andie… writing about cats - the one you have posted looks amazing. Such a characterful face. I saw lovely stripy tabby on the way to work this morning - and stopped to stroke her for a while and she was so appreciative.
Shelly glad to see you posting sgain and hope you enjoyed the steak.
Well I now I am actually about to fall asleep on the keyboard, I will have to up to bed.
Shell, good to see you back on here, amd am really pleased your OH is speaking to someone! I think the OH’s have quite a bum deal in this terrible situation that we are all in, there’s plenty of support for those of us who choose to accept it, I myself tend not to apart from you girls on here but that’s different, but I think the boys find it even harder to seek or even accept help, so good for him! Like everyone says Shell, try if you can to remain positive and stay strong. Great that you drove today as well, I think it’s really important to regain independence, I’ve got far too lazy lately and relied too much on family and friends driving me here, there and everywhere like some poor victim. On the days I get out and drive myself, I definatley feel better in myself!!!
Caron, Betty Spaghetti is a naughty girl, but then she’s allowed to be because she’s so cute! How you feeling after your last EC?
Andie, I think I may have the naughtiest cat on the planet, My Bennie (Christened, Mercedes Benz!) has started to develop really bad behaviour. He’s worse than my 2 year old with his constant attention seeking naughtiness. He won’t stop jumping up onto the work surfaces when I’m cooking and scratching up sofa and carpet, he’s always been a cheeky chappie and was allowed to get away with murder until 3 kids came along and now he’s sort of dropped in the pecking order and I think he’s decided enough is enough, whoever shouts the loudest in this house has the best chance of survival so because he can’t shout, he jumps up!!!
Haven’t posted yesterday because effects of TAX from Mon have started to kick in. Horrible acheyness and finger and toenails so so sore, couldn’t even text or type yesterday! Mouth feels slimmey and very tired! all normal i guess?
Have been out and about with little monster so not on my PC much. So so tired though…can hardly walk anywhere at the moment. Boys have gone to the shops as I couldn’t face it. I’m watching “Coach Trip” another fine example of total rubbish that i watch on TV! I couldn’t watch Jade I’m afraid - it’s too sad and I just can’t quite believe it has happened to her so quickly.
Shell - I was so sad to read your email, but I want to echo Mabel. I know stats give us an idea of things (and I haven’t asked for mine because I know it will be pants), but look at most of us on this forum. I read that as a 42 year old women I have a 1.44 percent chance of getting breast cancer. So that stat worked well for me then!!! We just don’t know what this disease will do. People with little lumps and no spread can end up in very bad situations. I was following the lymph node thread someone mentioned and it has some useful info in it - have a look!
There is no doubt this is crap stuff to deal with . But we all have to deal with each day as it comes and enjoy it as much as we can and you do too because although your lovely consultant scared the crap out of you, no one knows what will happen!! Mind you - I have no idea how we all do this one day at a time business and I am going to have to change the habits of a lifetime!!! But I am going to work at it because I know it’s important.
I’m just babbling now… But I’m thinking about you lots Shell and sending lots of love.
GXXXXXXXXXX
Bright - surgery…easy bit??? I don’t want to leave Chemo land at the moment!!!