Hello all,
I am wondering if anyone has tried psychotherapy at any time, and if so, did you find that it helped?
I have been seen by Occupational Health a few times, as I am having difficulty sometimes with work and everytime I see her, I burst into tears. She feels that I have’t properly come to terms with my diagnosis, or the medical errors which have unfortunately occurred in my care.
At first I dismissed it, but am now beginning to wonder if it may help. trouble is, the sessions cost about £50.00 /hr, so would love to hear if anyone has tried it and what they thought of it,before I spend out.
XXXX
HI there, I have been having counselling for which I pay myself - just about to have the last of 6 sessions this morning. I have found it really helpful just to try to make the cancer diagnosis be somewhere in my life that I can live with it and not ignore it OR let it overwhelm me -I was diagnosed almost a year ago and finished my treatment back in late sept.
my counsellor was most helpful at pointing out to me the things I was doing and what they are called in the counselling world - really made me feel better that my funny little attempts at bravely marching on, or suddenly talking about it all at not very appropriate moments were all normal parts of adjusting…
any chance you can get counselling through your Gp for free?
if you do choose one yourself be sure they are BACS approved.
best of luck Nicola
Hi
Just wanted to mention, I have been struggling since my treatment finished and kept bursting into tears at EVERYTHING. I turned to my local cancer help centre and I am starting a course ‘cancer,the next step’ on monday. Even after having my intial meeting at the centre and talking through my problems with someone who understood I felt better. Just thought It might be another option and it’s free.
Darcyb
If you get a good counsellor, they can be really helpful in helping you to get your head round things. I have had two sets of counselling throughout my life, and the first set was brilliant as it helped me deal with some specific issues and I got on really well with the counsellor. The second set was less than successful and I wish I’d realised that it wasn’t doing the trick. At the time I was seriously depressed but hadn’t actually realised it, so you would have thought that the counsellor might have mentioned the D word once or twice after some of the things I’d told her - just a brief “do you think you might be a bit depressed?” would have made such a difference! So she was rubbish for me. I think a different counsellor would have been different though.
I would certainly give it a go, and you should be able to get some help for it through your GP as well, but if you don’t “click” with the first person you see, do ask to see someone else.
I have tried counselling several times for various things.
If you have access to Maggie’s centre that is your best bet to be honest. I went to a different counsellor recently (I had moved) the alternatives I found just did not work for me. It was pretty huge the difference in ability between Maggies staff and others (even through other cancer support centres - one in particular was AWFUL - well for me at least).
It really depends on you personally if you get something from talking therapies but from my own research they are pretty great at helping with Anxiety. I have lapsed from going and I now need to reconnect with someone (luckily just moved back to a Maggie’s area!!!)
Be careful of anti-depressants. They work well and are great for short term use but I found out after I had taken mine for a few months that my GP had not checked and I was advised at Young Womens Forum that Fluoxitine (Prozac) interacts with Tamoxifen and therefore isn’t advisable. I had taken that anti-D so was pretty disappointed at doctor to be honest. There are others that don’t interact if you do need them.
It’s totally understandable to need help and this need comes and goes and it’s so important to listen to your inner voice on what you need. I am currently ‘treating’ myself to some gentle reflexology and massage as having problems with my reconstruction (pain) and that too can help with feelings.
Be as good to yourself as you would be to your nearest and dearest!
Cxx
My breast clinic has a clinical psychologist attached to it, so I was able to get counselling on the NHS. I had 6 sessions over about 4 months and it really sorted my head out; the psychologist was a woman and would set me little goals at the end of each session, which I would then try to work towards before the next visit to her. She also taught me about cognitive behavioural techniques. It allowed me to move forward and get on with life again without thinking about illness and cancer all the time.
My clinic also asked if I would volunteer to be in a group at the local Maggies as they were looking into the effects of stress on BC patients. We were taught how to use mindfulness meditation and yoga stretches. That was 3 years ago and I still tap into what they taught me as I found it very effective. It was so successful that Maggies now run the programme for people with all types of cancer.
I was offered 6 sessions of free counselling at my local cancer centre but didn’t get on her approach, although other people I know found it helpful. My GP has offered me cognitive behaviour therapy after I cried in her surgery. I found you need to ask or nobody offers.Good luck.
Yes, CBT was the one that really worked well for me when I had a specific issue I wanted to approach.
Actually, asking for help is a positive thing here, because you are acknowledging that things aren’t working too well for you and you want to improve them. Pat yourself on the back for taking that step.
I think anyone who has an understanding GP is very lucky. Most of the GPs at my surgery are of the “just get on with it” school of thinking. Mine actually refused to give permission for the breast clinic to refer me for counselling and he was overruled by my oncologist (it’s a strange system here, they have to get permission from your GP as the GP looks after you in the community).
The psychologist I saw had moved from another health board where she said cancer patients were automatically referred by their GPs if they needed help; however, she said in this health district doctors were not keen to refer. One of the staff at the local Maggies told me they constantly had patients who felt their GPs were letting them down. My GP just barked at me “you do NOT need to see a clinical psychologist, you just need to accept the fact you’ve had cancer, have had the treatment and just get on with living again”. To say I was shocked is an understatement and when I think back to it I really should have complained. I also saw the only woman in the practice who just happens to be his wife and she backed him up by saying there must have been a misunderstanding!
What irked me more than anything else is they have a big sign up in reception saying if you have drug or alcohol problems they can refer you for psychotherapy, yet I got cancer though no fault of my own.
That is really appalling, Cherub. Is there another practise near you? I haven’t been refered to a a clinical psychologist as the practise has a contract with a CB therapist.
Thank you to all of you for your posts and sorry for the delay in replying, computer has been off line for a while.
All these have been incredibly useful for me, and certainly given me a direction to go for. As for Maggies centre- i had never heard of these, but have now googled them and they sound fantastic. I live about 40 miles away from London so I am going to try to get to one of these. Although it was 6 years ago since I was dx, I don’t think that I have really come to terms with it all, just gone through as best I can. I did have some counselling from the councellor at the hospital, which helped a bit (I wasn’t refferred to her until 2 years after my dx).Cherub- I was told similar by my GP , and even my breast care nurse sadly - she said I didn’t need to see a counsellor, that i just needed to accept everything and I should feel better once I had done that-awful, isn’t it? Sad to hear that we need to have drug or alchohol probems for a referral…
I was just wondering- does anyone know the difference between counselling and psychotherapy?
Once again, thank you all so much for your posts- can’t tell you how helpful they have been XXXXX
Hi Happyshopper
Psychotherapy is an approach that can be used in counselling. Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) can be effective when there are specific problems i.e. heightened levels of anxiety, depression, etc. CBT focusses on helping people manage their thoughts feelings and behaviour in a positve way.
Maggie’s centres are a good resource. McMillan also employ Psychologists who can provide counselling.
Good luck
Alex
Hello there,
my understanding of the difference between counselling and psychotherapy is that counselling can and often is quite short term and often focussed on an issue. There are many sorts of counselling and CBT is one of them.
Psychotherapy is often much more long term, but even if it isn’t it is a much deeper approach, looking at childhood etc…not that this might not come up in counselling too but in psychotherapy it inevitably will. Again there are lots of different types of psychotherapy. Also with psychotherapy you can be asked to see your therapist two to three times a week, whereas with counselling its often once a week or once a fortnight…
you might find more on Brit Assoc of Counselling website,
best Nicola
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Hi
I have had both counselling and psychotherapy and have an Advanced Diploma in Counselling and Psychotherapy. The therapy I had was by personal choice and then some as a requirement of the qualifciation.
Counselling is “Psychotherapy-lite”. Psychotherapy delves deeper and is generally for longer. The theoretical basis is Freud i.e. issues stem from childhood. In cases whre we have cancer it cannot of course chnage that fact, but it can highlight why we may be finding certain aspects of “dealing with cancer” difficult…think of it as having a tool box with tools for dealing with life…the shape and design of your own individual tools are made in childhood, we form patterns and repeat those…espcially in times of trauma, which getting BC is most definitely one.
I found it immensely helpful but I know a lot of people don’t…mainly because they can’t “go there”… it can be quite painful going over old stuff.
Unfortuantely, psychotherpay is rarely available on the NHS, whereas CBT is…it’s the flavour of the moment…it’s quicker, therefore cheaper.
Bettina
Hi Happyshopper
If you do decide to have counselling or psychotherapy and are looking for a qualified therapist in your area just follow the link below. It will take you to the British Association of Counselling and Psycotherapy who hold a list of therapists who are registered with them.
wam.bacp.co.uk/wam/SeekTherapist.exe?NEWSEARCH
I hope this is helpful.
Best wishes Sam, Facilitator
Most of the problems I had were to do with anxiety/panic attacks, so CBT techniques were great for this. However, I had a lot of stuff come to the surface relating to issues from my childhood, in particular to do with my elder sister who now lives abroad. She was here staying with me when I was diagnosed and went home the following day. Afterwards, she didn’t come near us whilst I was undergoing treatment. Next time I saw her, I was in hospital isolation at the end of treatment and she told me I was fat. The psychologist taught me how to deal with all this and I decided just to let my sister live in her own selfish world. I don’t think things will ever be the same between us again. She is visiting this week and I have to spend a day on my own with her tomorrow as my OH is away on business. Thankfully she leaves the following day as I have found the past few days very stressful. She is in total denial about the fact I had cancer and it makes life very difficult. To say I have been short tempered this week is an understatement, I have been taking it out on the treadmill at the gym in the mornings! Had I not been able to discuss all this in confidence with someone I think I would have ended up being very bitter and I did not want to go down that route.