Having a wobble

I am usually an optimist but have just got home after staying with my parents for the week to find lots of letters waiting for me including the one from the bresst surgeon where they 1st confirmed to me that I have bc ? reading this through I feel my throat closing up and panic kicking in…maybe at the appointment I did not grasp what was being said fully but reading this on paper its really worrying and I have to continually stop myself fearing the worst. I had a MRI scan on Tuesday just and I have a stereo guided core biopsy scheduled for Wednesday…I am trying to stay rational and not get upset but it just overwhelmes me at what else they might find and I can’t hold back the tears. Latley I have been getting a back ache and tingling around my upper back so then my mind goes into overdrive…really did not want to write that last sentence because now I am acknowledging the tingling where as before I could talk myself into it being a long day or maybe I had to lift my daughter. Last but not least It was suggested a couple of weeks ago that Kingsr College would be a better hospital as they have state of the art equipment so this is playing I my mind now also.l and I don’t know what to do for the best in terms of where to be treatedt. Has anyone else had a stero guided mammogram biopsy or change hospitals before treatment? It’s very late so sleep will help me focus better.
Hugs Claire

Morning, Deep breathe, remember everyone, everyone is there to help. Family,  friends,  BCN, Surgeons, Oncologists, us here on this site. We are here holding your hand, we are good at that, as we are all on the journey. Cannot answer your question re moving hospital, some one else will. As to every ache, pain, tingle,  is magnified 1000%,  that is normal, happens every day,  we always jump to the worse senario. Two days ago I had tingling in my fingers,  a pain in my elbow which was also slightly swollen, I talked myself into sepsis and that I would not be able to have chemo, ever. I showed it to my BCN, who i was seeing anyway, who reassured me that it was a midge bite. That I always have this swelling when bitten, I had forgotten.  Every newly recognised pain is a sign of the cancer spreading, NOT TRUE. Our bodies do have aches and pains , all the time, we just become more sensitive to them. If you are not sure, ask. As to the biopsy I found it OK, everything was explained, for me, it was quick and easy, and not sore. Had to wait a little while for results, but not too long. Have a good day today, and stick with this site. Hugs Cazzy  

As Cazzy says, Claire.
We’ve all had an attack of the ‘wobbles’ when going through this, suddenly it can feel just all too much, with the mind going into overdrive in trying to fill in the gaps.
It does settle down.
I found it helped to remind myself that going through all the investigations would mean I got the best treatment plan for me, which is really want they’re for.
There have been others who’ve changed hospitals here, however, the vast majority of us tend to stay with the team we were referred to. Treatments plans are fairly standard where ever you are.
Sending hugs
ann x

Klairee, first of all big hugs. Sorry you found yourself here late at night but glad you found us.  As Cassie and Ann have said, it is normal to get the wobbles at this stage as you have been given life changing news.  I know how it feels to be scared of your own body and to no longer trust every ache, pain, rash. Once you’ve received one piece of bad news, why not another. That’s the mindset you develop which spirals your mind out of control.   You should receive the same protocol for treatment at any NHS hospital so try not to worry about the transfer. I suppose the communication gets more confusing for you with being moved around and you’re probably worrying about information being transferred efficiently?  Just keep in touch with your new BCN. They are really good at keeping you in the loop.  Once your treatment plan starts you will feel better but the period from diagnosis to treatment is the hardest time. Here is my story which I hope you find some comfort from: lifeafterlola.blogspot.com/

Best wishes. Xxx