Hello. I have been diagnosed today, my daughter was with me. Following biopsies they said it was oestrogen receptive and in lymph nodes. I have a ct scan on Tuesday and then treatment will be decided. I am very scared. Mum died of it 37 years ago, and that’s all I can see for myself. I am 56.
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Hello and welcome
Sorry you find yourself here. It’s a great place to ask questions and get feedback from other people’s experiences. I’ve received plenty of support and advice, and I hope you find that too.
It’s a lot to take in when you hear those words. I was expecting it (my mum had breast cancer also) but it still hits you hard, and then your mind goes into overdrive. It sounds as though they have some further tests to complete, but once they have that information they can discuss a treatment plan. The testing helps identify the different types of breast cancer and their individual characteristics which is always progressing. The advantage being more targeted and beneficial treatments, with more successful outcomes. I’m sorry your mum was less fortunate, but it doesn’t necessarily mean you have the same type of cancer, and the prognosis may be more positive. Try hold on to that way of thinking, it’s going to be a challenging few weeks.
Wishing you well x
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Thankyou so much for replying. I saw this diagnosis as the end of the road for me, but seeing and reading so much positivity is already providing some light in the dark.
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Yes try to hold onto the positive bits. I’m not going to lie, it’s difficult. I’ve gone from one extreme to the other. Your mind is a powerful tool and plays havoc with your emotions and thoughts.
Use all the help you can get both physically and mentally. Be selfish and prioritise the things that you need to do, not what others expect you to do. Ask questions. Lots of questions, to satisfy your mind.
I’ve had a few niggles (it’s to be expected) along my journey, but overall I have been impressed by the doctors and nurses, and how well treatments have been delivered. I say that, sitting in bed with a swollen red breast from Radiotherapy, but it will pass 
.
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I’m so sorry to hear this, it’s so strong of you to be able to offer advice amidst your own gruelling treatment.
Like you, I was impressed today by the doctors and have been assigned a lovely nurse whom I can contact with any questions.
This is the start of my journey, and I will take one day at a time. X
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@sue9 hello! I’m at the beginning of my journey too and my mam died from breast cancer 35 years ago. I’m 55, the same age she was when she died. It makes it salary but I think I’ve always expected it to come my way.
I had my MRI yesterday and get surgery on 23rd. I get confirmation on Thursday next week about the planned lumpectomy.
People on here are great and so supportive.
Best of luck x
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Hi @sue9 welcome to the forum that no-one wants to be on. If your tumour is oestrogen positive (er+ in the lingo) then you have what over 65% of people have - the benefit of that is that it has been very well researched and the treatment for it is well understood and practiced. There is another important marker too, called HER2 which can be + or -. You may not have been given the result of that test yet. Either way, you will soon be given a treatment plan and once you have that, you will feel more in control - taking active steps to get the thing gone is empowering.
I’m very sorry that your Mum was taken by this disease but in the 37 years since her passing, cancer research has progressed exponentially and most of us can expect full recovery. It’s very early days for you and it seems like a prophecy is being fulfilled however the odds on this being successfully treated are very high. The path through can be arduous both physically and emotionally but it IS doable.
If you feel like you need a bit of help getting through these early stages, I can recommend the free counselling offered by BUPA via MacMillan, which you can find out more about here Free counselling for people with cancer | Macmillan Cancer Support
If you can find a Maggie’s Centre at a nearby hospital, either NHS or private (eg Nuffield hospitals) you can just drop in for support, from a cup of tea and a chat to seminars and talking therapy sessions. You can find out more about them here https://www.maggies.org/
There is a lot of knowledgeable support out there, including the Breast Cancer Nurses on 0808 800 6000 who will give you time to chat through your questions and feelings and make things feel more manageable.
And you always have us. For context, I had er+ HER2- cancer diagnosed two and a half years ago following life-long expectation that I would get breast cancer due to family history. I was 66 at the time. I had surgery, radiotherapy and have endocrine suppression tablets for 5 years (only around 30% of women with BC have to have chemotherapy). It took a while for me to understand that no-one dies of primary breast cancer as the breast is not an organ, and the treatment plan is all about prevention of spread, but now I no longer have that sense of dread, of inevitability, that I believe you may be feeling. I hope that you are able to reach that place too. I wish you all the best for your cancer journey, support is the key.
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Big hug.
As tigress says too: in the past 37 years treatment has improved massively. There are so much more very effective possibilities now that simply didn’t exist then. Take it one step at the time for now. The time between diagnosis and treatment starting is scary and feels like eternity, but once you have a plan it will get better mentally.
Warmest
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Hello @sue9 I am so sorry to hear about your news, I too lost my Mother to breast cancer and felt very scared when I was diagnosed. I agree with others that have already posted which is to say that it doesn’t mean that you have the same cancer diagnosis as your mother and targeted treatment has moved on massively over the years, with research aiming to improve those options and outcomes. At the time of my diagnosis, my brother gave me an interesting perspective when he said that I should think of breast cancer treatment like a mobile phone, the technology was basic when my Mum was diagnosed but look at it now, there is so much more that can be done. I wish you all the best on your journey, take care of yourself x
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Thankyou so much: I will hold onto this perspective. X
Hello. I’m 56, and mum was 53 when she died of this disease. I hope that we can possibly stay in touch during our treatment. All the best with the MRI result and your surgery.
Thankyou so much for replying. X
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Thankyou so much. X
Thankyou so much for this message… I am walking into the unknown, worrying about the ct scan results, and also the fact that it has spread to some lymph nodes.
And thankyou for information about support groups. X
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Hi Sue9. Sorry you have to be here but the experience of those who have gone through it is invaluable. It certainly was to me 9.5 years ago when I was diagnosed with an oestrogen+ tumour. I am still here and very much enjoying life. Hard to imagine where you are at the moment but it happens. Keep in mind that in the 37 years since you sadly lost your mum, there has been so much research and advancements in treatment and there continues to be so. When I was diagnosed at 51 in 2015 I didn’t think I’d be here now but I am and loving it. Sending you best wishes for your treatment. Keep hanging out here and you will be very well supported by a group of lovely people. xx
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Thankyou… That gives me so much hope. C
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Hello
As others have posted there is so much information, support and help on here so please be reassured that the waiting part is the most daunting, worrying time but you’ve started having tests and scans and then your team called 'multidisciplinary team or MDT will review everything and then share their plan with you
Its going to be detailed so take someone with you for note taking and support and if its unclear to you ask. No question is ever silly
Research has meant huge steps in treatments and recovery so take comfort from that
I am so very sorry that you lost your mom to this horrible disease, big hugs xx
Try to distract yourself with work, friends, walks, cuppas etc whilst you wait ( easier said than done)
Good luck and blessings to you xx
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@Tigress that info really helps me too. I have my MRI results and treatment confirmation on Thursday. My head is telling me it could change as I may have the gene but I don’t know yet if they’ll test for that or what it will mean. This forum is so helpful 
@sue9 yes! Let’s keep in touch. My next big day is Thursday so I’m just hanging in until then 
I just hope things don’t escalate from the initial plan which sounds doable. Good luck to you too
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Knowledge is power as the old saying goes @warmfuzzies . Without it, we imagine the worst, most terrifying outcomes but the reality is, it rarely comes to that. Yes, for some people, things change as treatment progresses, but for the majority of people, treatment is straightforward. Not necessarily pleasant but doable and effective. Hang on to that. I wish you good results, as much certainty as is possible in this situation (yeah, I know …) and a cancer-free life at the end of it.
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I will be thinking of you and sending warmest wishes for Thursday. X
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