After reading some people’s experiences with chemo I’m so scared of getting sepsis that I’m seriously thinking of not having chemo. I’m absolutely petrified and can’t stop shaking when I think about it . Was due to start this week but been delayed as had to have mastectomy after 2 failed lumpectomies. I honestly don’t think I can go through with it. And I’m Feeling really low . Why me . Why us .
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First of all, I just wanted to say I’m sorry you’re so down and scared - it’s an emotional rollercoaster!
I felt quite concerned about infection risk/sepsis during chemo too as my immune system isn’t the best but then realised there are elements I can control. I’ve just finished chemo after starting in April and haven’t had sepsis or anything that’s meant a hospital stay 
things I focussed on were hand hygiene (washing hands plenty), oral hygiene (I brush my teeth and use either mouthwash or a mix of salt/bicarbonate of soda in water after meals), minimising socialising indoors and sticking to outdoor walks to meet people other than my close family or if going busy places wearing an FFP2 mask. I also take my temp morning, noon and night. Another thing I done was check what foods to avoid on chemo and make sure I was properly sticking to food hygiene rules and recommendations in food prep/storage just to avoid any gastro type bugs.
You’ll get a phone number for the helpline too and I think the mistake some people make is being too scared to bother people if you have symptoms or start feeling unwell …. The number is there to be used so if you start to get a temperature, for example, then phone it - don’t worry about being a nuisance as you’re not! I’d much rather phone and everything is fine than the other way round☺️ I’ve used it a few times and if they have any concerns or are unsure they will get you in to make sure you’re ok and get on top of any infections quickly. You’ll get a book with side effects and signs of infection etc so just keep it handy and it’s good to use to check what to look out for. Honestly there are a few things that help you have some control over the situation and that made me feel better knowing that so I hope this reassures you a bit at least
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I am so sorry that you are feeling this way. It really is an emotional rollercoaster!
I just wanted to offer reassurance, I have been pretty well on chemo! The first one was hard and I genuinely went into my oncologist at my next appointment and cried saying I couldnt do it, but it really does get easier. Ive been able to still be pretty active and take my dogs for a walk every day (apart from the odd day). I generally feel well in myself day to day, just tired all the time but thats also due to not sleeping! I have just been really cautious with coming into contact with other people. I only meet up with friends if its outside, if im meeting anyone i always ask if they are feeling okay, I wash my hands as soon as I get in from the supermarket or use hand sanitiser in the car. I wont go to a restaurant and sit outside if I am.
I have a PICC line and the only issues Ive had is blood clots and a blocked line once. The blood clots were picked up really quickly, as I rang the emergency number as soon as I thought something was wrong. Im now on blood thinners and havnt had a problem since.
Its so easy to ask ourselves the ‘why?’ questions but its important to remember that you can do this, you are strong enough and you are capable of doing it.
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@epic1-dont be too scared, it’s not as bad as you’re thinking. I’ve been a chemo nurse for 10 years so was freaked out when I needed it but the chemos for breast cancer are not as toxic as others, that’s why we have it as an outpatient. Getting an infection is a risk but it’s quite rare so as long as you’re careful (like the others have advised u about) then u should be fine. Yes you’ll feel crap for a few days after but then you’ll go back to normal. I had a PICC line with no issues as do lots of women.
Hope this helps xxx
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Hi @epic1
I was scared too I had heard so much about chemo.
The advice given on this trail is good, look after yourself and avoid crowds, takeaways, food that you are not sure about, wear masks etc. I completed 20 weeks of chemo at the end of July, have had no sepsis, no issues at all with my picc line, and I continued to eat healthily although could not taste anything. It helped minimise side effects. We are all there for you! Chemo is doable, there will be highs and lows and we can give you support and tips.
Big hugs
Marion x
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Honestly there are many many people who dont get infections …i took my temperature 3 times a day having chemo over 6 monyhs …it never went over 36.3 …its not a walk in the park …and there are lots of side effects …but mostly not dangerous ones
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I have been having chemo and tried hard to reduce risk of infection but recently did end up in hospital as had a fever and they thought I had sepsis but it was pneumonia. Luckily it was caught early and didn’t suffer too much but did stay in hospital for a few days.
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I started off getting cannulated and was getting EC/Docetaxel but after 3 EC my veins were too difficult so I got a Hickman line in (I wasn’t suitable for a PICC and waiting list too long for the port in my area). It’s been much easier since the Hickman
Just also wanted to mention that I’ve been drinking lots of water and have been still managing to do exercise throughout as well. Everyone is different with side effects and I have had my share of them, but when I flagged any problematic ones there was usually advice or medication they gave me to help with it and I find that even just going a walk helps with the fatigue side of things. I honestly thought before chemo that I’d be unable to do a lot by the end, but I have found that I’m still able to do a lot of things (just at a slower pace etc) and it hasn’t been as bad that way as I thought
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Hi Epic
Stop! Take a deep breath. Try not to worry. I know it’s easier said than done. Do not Google chemo side effects.
People are more likely to share bad chemo experiences than ok or good ones. Many more people get through chemo without (major/any) problems than those who don’t.
The thought of having chemo is as scary as hell. I promise you, the unknown is worse than actually having chemo. A good friend of mine was a health care assistant on my trust’s chemo ward. We went for a walk (lockdown!) while she explained about it. Quite a while after, she said that I was grey with fear. One chemo down and I was so less worried - an old hand, I’d done it.
I recommend you call the nurses here to off-load and share your fears with your team. Your team will do everything in their power to keep you as well as possible and will act quickly if you aren’t well. You just need to listen to their advice, act on their guidelines, especially if you do feel ill and stick like glue to what your trust’s escalation process is if you do.
If you take a look at any of the starting chemo month/year threads you will read that 99% of people are bricking it but they’re of a different mind when they’ve had their first dose and they’re not too poorly.
The worst bit for me was when the huge doses of steroids stopped a few days or so after my 3 weekly chemo sessions. The withdrawals were awful. Towards the end of my weekly sessions, I had a very high temperature. I had a reaction to a Covid jab. I knew it, the hospital knew it but they had me in overnight to check - blood tests and monitoring to make sure it wasn’t an infection because of a chemo knackered immune system.
You can never say never but sepsis? Extremely unlikely.
You’ve got, and can do, this.
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I am due to start chemo in September and I am also very very scared. Inside I am screaming noooooo I don’t want this! I’m petrified of a cannula because of toxic leaks, I’m scared of the toxicity and effect on my healthy cells, diarrhoea, my family watching this, I could go on and on. I’ve delayed too, put it off and completely understand your worries. I’ve read the other comments and they are reassuring to read and give me an insight of what’s to come but the unknown is scary as hell!
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I’m just so scared of hospitals and needles. Had 3 generals recently due to surgery and they couldn’t find a vein. I can only have one arm used due to the other one having a node clearance. The chemo unit won’t allow a friend or husband . I don’t think I’ll make it to the chair! Think I might have to look at getting a bit of medication help maybe ? I’ve tried counselling through McMillan but keep being let down. I literally wake up shaking. Funnily enough I seem to be sleeping ok !
You guys are amazing ! I really hope that I can be as strong as you ! Xx
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Why do your chemo unit not allow you to have a companion? I’ve not heard of this, this seems unduly harsh
Regarding your fear of needles, can you get a PICC line lovely?
I just wanted to send a hug and solidarity as I am starting chemo early September and I too am bricking it. Been reading through the July & August chemo starters posts on this forum which have helped, hoping a September starters one will get started soon
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But I also feel the same as you, I’m trying not to let the dark thoughts overtake me. But I agree, why me, why us. In fact I am really fucking angry about the whole thing. My BCN has said anger is a good emotion & will get me through this
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I know its very daunting but please dont be scared… i had my second round yesterday.
Its not as bad as what you think! You kind of freak your self out because of what it is… i never thought i would have chemo but here i am! Its very doable and once you get your first out of the way you will be fine and know what to expect and know how to manage any side effects.
You got this! X
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Ask again about bringing someone with you!! My husband and friend came to every chemo. If it was busy they would take it in turns to sit with me and the other would sit outside. They should allow you at least one person, defo ask again xxx
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There is no room. It’s done in a tiny box room as they have half the hospital closed for refurbishment. I’m thinking of asking to go to another hospital. I just don’t want to make a fuss but I think I need to or I just won’t be able to do it . So scared
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You will be ok …they will really look after you…and if no fanily members allowed…then less chance of infection…i did chemo in lockdown 2020 so every appointment for everything was alone …sometimes it makes for a good time to get some head space on your own …wishing you well
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I’ve also been told my husband can only come for the first session then I’m on my own for the rest. And it’s not small the chemo suite at my hospital either.
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Hi the worst thing to do is read Facebook posts about other people I did this and scared me so much. I had 8 cycles every 3 weeks off chemotherapy for 8 months nearly everyone is different I no but I was fine wasn’t poorly or anything just tired. Please don’t not have chemo iv had all my treatments now and I’m ok I had tripple negative breast cancer I have yearly checks now but I’m doing great
Xx
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