@frazzledmcsazza thank you. It’s hard. Those mental wobbles always threaten and it requires constant work to keep them at bay. Some days they win, some days they don’t. This helps. This solidarity is like having an army. We have each others backs and I know that when I have a mental wobble I am on here like a shot. It’s what led me here in the first place. One day at a time…one day at a time.
XXX
Amen sweetheart. We got you.
Morning
So that’s my PET-CT scan done yesterday. Today is brain MRI scan. It seems never ending.
Love to all,
Sal
x
One down…
Well done @salbert. Hopefully you’ll get the results soon and I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you that they are positive.
Hi guys
Both scans done now. I’m off for a second opinion tomorrow over at Royal Marsden in Sutton.
I think I can’t continue with my current consultant, all things considered.
Hope everyone is ok today and is getting this sunshine that we are having in Surrey today. It helps, doesn’t it.
Sal
xx
Good luck, Sal. I hope you feel really good after your meeting.
Uh yeah. There ain’t no excuse for that doctor. Makes me mad to think about it.
Hey, my friends
I think I have good news. I spoke to my MacMillan nurse this morning who said that my PET-CT scan and my brain MRI scan showed No Uptake. She said that the radiologist may still want me to do a liver MRI and may even want a biopsy as she was suspicious of my small liver legion but that it was positive news. If it was cancer the areas would light up apparently.
I can hardly believe it. Dare I believe that it was just in my right breast and 2 lymph nodes? The invasive cancer and the lymph nodes are all out so it’s possible that I just have a bit of DCIS left which will go with the mastectomy.
I’m off to Royal Marsden now.
This whole journey is so traumatic and I haven’t even started the chemo yet.
Sal
xx
Oh sweetie. That is absolutely wonderful and quite honestly the most probable scenario. Yes de novo cases happen but only 6% of the new breast cancer cases are those. At any rate, I would hope at this point that they just move on to active treatment and you can finally proceed with putting this part behind you.
@salbert I am so pleased for you. That is very good news and hopefully means that even if they do more tests on your liver they will also be negative. Very pleased to hear you are getting second opinion. I got my date for my hopefully first and last op this week for later in Feb. I mentioned your experience to my surgeon and the macmillan nurse at my appointment and they looked a bit horrified. They said maximum surgeries they would do is three. So I think a new consultant is needed. I hope you find someone you can put more trust in.
Aww Sal that’s amazing news and I bet that’s lifted a massive weight off your shoulders!! x
I’ve not been on much lately…I’ve had good days and bad days. My bruising under my arm pit has come down but I’ve got a big lump under my scar and that still hurts a bit and my boob is still yellow and black and also now has a lump under the scar site but that doesn’t hurt so much. I’ve been doing the daily exercises and am counting down the days till I get the results of my surgery and lymphnode extraction (Thursday). The doctor saw me after my surgery and said she didn’t think it has spread anywhere so fingers crossed it will all be good and I will just need minimum treatment as the tumor was small. I just hate all the waiting and I’m feeling like a bit of an imposter at the moment whilst I read everyone else’s experiences and mine seems tiny compared.
@chellebelle good luck for Thursday I hope you also get some positive news. We are all in the same stressful boat when it comes to waiting so please don’t feel like an imposter.
Hi @chellebelle
Glad you are recovering, be kind to yourself. Sorry you have a lump near your scar, it could be just fluid build up that goes away. Speak to your team on Thursday.
Hello to all my wonderful friends
@chellebelle - there are no rules for how much you need to suffer to feel scared, sad, lonely and the whole gamut of emotions that overwhelm you when you get that breast cancer diagnosis. I went through a hideous time 10 years ago when I discovered my ex-husband had a gambling addiction and that we were thousands in debt. I lost my home, our business, our savings, we were living under the threat of him going to prison, investigations by HMRC, fraud squad and I had to take our 4 year old son and start again on my own in rented accommodation and go and find a full-time job immediately.
What I have gone through in the past 3 months was worse.
Nothing compares to the sheer terror of losing your life and leaving behind the people that rely on you. When I was warned that the scans showing up areas in my spine and liver that were ‘red flags’, I was preparing for the worst. Every time you get told that your operation is unsuccessful, that your cancer is invasive, that it’s aggressive, that it’s in your lymph nodes, etc., despair threatens to engulf you. It is a constant battle to keep putting one foot in front of the other yet somehow you do it. You carry on eating, sleeping, working, being a mum, looking after elderly parents despite the constant voice in your ear saying ‘Cancer, cancer, cancer’.
Quite simply, nothing in my life has been as bad as the last 3 months.
We have all walked that walk. We are bonded in a hideous experience that leaves you so full of gratitude when you get that news that you are going to be ok. I get it now. I get why people use the word survivors when they talk about coming out the other side of cancer treatment.
If anyone had told me that I would feel so positive about being told I am 2 weeks away from starting 6 months of chemotherapy, I wouldn’t have believed them. Right now I feel nothing but intense relief and gratitude. My appetite has returned and my joy in life. The grip of fear is released. So no, dear Chellebelle, NEVER feel like an imposter because you feel that somehow your journey might be smoother. Please let us know on Thursday.
The female consultant I saw yesterday was called Katherine Krupa and she was absolutely lovely. Nurturing, professional, empathetic - the polar opposite of Doctor Doom and the Angel of Gloom. I am switching without a doubt. It is time to move on and she filled me with confidence. She is going to do the mastectomy to remove the remaining DCIS and the reconstruction at the end and said that I will be looking at about a year as it all began on 9th November 2023 and she envisages it being through by about November. There is actually light at the end of the tunnel. Nothing, nothing compares to this news.
I’ve said it before and I say it again. You guys have been my lifeline.
I hope you are all enjoying the weekend.
Stay strong and big hugs to you all.
Sal
xx
Hi @salbert
What has happened to you in the past is horrendous but you pulled your big girl socks up and got on with it. I’m sure you will do the same with cancer. 6 months of chemotherapy sounds scary, there are ladies who started with me in September still receiving treat and experiencing the side effects but we are still here for them. I’m sure when you start chemo you will also join the monthly group that you start your treatment and will have so much support and sharing of experiences.
I’m so pleased the new consultant was easier to deal with and gave you real timescales and progression for your treatment plan. I would consider if you are able or your husband on your behalf consider a formal complaint to the hospital about your consultant as it’s probably not just you who is on the receiving end. If you complain there may be others and he can be spoken to about his behaviour and work ethic. The headlines in the media recently about the nurse who killed babies would never have been found out if staff and patients had not spoken out. Don’t feel pressured to consider it, it’s just a suggestion.
Have a wonderful weekend🥰
Now that is what you needed to hear, Salbert. And I’m so happy for you. It seems weird to say because after all you have breast cancer, but now you’ve got a plan, you know when it starts, and that means healing can start, too. Congratulations!! You can now start getting rid of this damned thing.
And in saying that, chemo is daunting but most of us do okay with it thanks to the wonderful drugs that help us mitigate side effects. Make sure to check out the numerous conversations that have been had on this site in regards to what people recommend you get. The ones I found the most helpful were the mouthwash, nail cream, and lotions. I bought as much as I could afford so that if a problem happened I already had the solution on hand. And the experience sucked, I wouldn’t want to repeat it, but quite honestly it didn’t impede my life all that much. I moved slower towards the latter treatment and that was about it. And complete recovery was mine. So yes, truly indeed there is a light now at the end of the tunnel and you can finally move towards it. I don’t think I’ve ever been more relieved for a stranger on the internet but oh my gosh does your first doctor suck! It made me shudder…
