Dear all
Had chemotherapy yesterday neo adjuvant im on n taxal so dont have many side effects apart from worry
i mer a girl who had a recurrence and it through me off balance
i feel really down today and just feel ive been dealt a bad deck of cards with her 2 its in three lymph nodes ct scan clear and its a 3.7 cm lump im terrified i get through all this and get a reoccurence
Hi Ruth
Ring your breast care nurse and ask for a face to face meeting next time you’re in. You need reassurance from someone who knows the precise details of your breast cancer. Taxol is weekly isn’t it so maybe she could come up and see you during treatment?
I’m delighted to see you’re not experiencing much by way of side effects but yes, anxiety is a debilitating side effect which needs addressing. The oncology team is more likely to be of constructive use than your GP practice during treatment. I’d advise you to write down your fears and ask specific questions about the risk of recurrence in your particular case (if you really want to know - I didn’t) - or you may get the ‘everyone feels like this initially’ fob-off.
However, they do say that there’s a degree of truth in every cliché (and I’m adding platitude). It does get easier as your fears settle and your perspective changes. Every diagnosis is different - the fact that this young woman is facing a recurrence doesn’t mean you will. Be proactive now, get as near to the facts as you can/want and find ways to live comfortably with them. There is never a guarantee it won’t come back - but for the vast majority, it doesn’t. I’m considered ‘high risk.’ There’s a 1 in 4 chance it will come back. That’s a 3 in 4 chance it won’t. I’m happy most of the time reminding myself that 3 in 4 is rather good odds, even if its not the guarantee I’d wish for. Imagine buying a lottery ticket with 3 in 4 chances of winning!
I hope you find some peace of mind, Jan x