Stage 2 invasive ductal waiting for mri scan then lumpectomy then is a ? Feeling alone at the moment i dont have a big network around me to support me it would be great to chat and share our journey
Hi Fairydust
What a wonderful name. Maybe it will bring you some luck. I’m sorry you’ve found yourself here but it’s definitely the right place. Everyone has experienced the same fears and frustrations, confusion and doubt - but it’s not all negative. There are many here who have come out the other side and are smiling.
I wanted to say that, no matter how complete your support network is, my experience is that this is a lonely experience - unless you reach out to those who understand. No matter how supportive your partner, family or friends are, they simply cannot understand quite how complex our emotions are. For a start, our sense of safety in the world is whipped away and replaced with why, when, what if??? And there are no real answers because we are all different natures.
Let go of the terror and experience this as just an unpleasant and scary time. Try not to dwell on the fears - that’s not what you need right now. You need resilience and you can usefully spend your time before surgery in practising mindfulness, going running, meditating, whatever is going to make you feel a little calmer. Stay away from Google - it’s almost guaranteed to frighten you and is often way out of date. There are NHS-endorsed apps like Calm and Headspace with lots of ideas for keeping your mind free of terror (as you’ve labelled it and as I felt it at the time!). I rely on Progressive Hypnosis videos, free on YouTube. I started with the Calm Anxiety and the Manifest Healing and now focus on the healing meditations. They give me a respite from stress.
You are right, you do need support but it needn’t be big. You’ll need some help getting to and from surgery. Ideally you’d have some support afterwards but you can prepare to help yourself by getting in a good supply of ready meals (or making them yourself) because heavy pans and wielding chopping knives might be hard, depending on what side it is, for a few days. The MRI scan sounds scary but it isn’t. It’s just very noisy (don’t be fooled when they say bring your own music - you may catch 10 notes in 45 minutes!). You also have to lie still and you do need to have a cannula for the contrast dye. If you find this unthinkable, then your GP or the hospital can prescribe something. Diazepam isn’t ideal because it sedates you but lorazepam simply makes you feel you can deal with anything - I had it prescribed for chemo because I was so terrified lol.
After that, I’m afraid you have to wait for the results. There is a lot of waiting all the way through. There has to be if they are going to get things right for you. It’s not a one-size-fits-all situation.
Wishing you all the best for what lies ahead and for reassuring results from your MRI,
Jan x
Hello - I’ve just joined having seen your post. I have been diagnosed the same as you this week - stage 2 invasive in breast and lymph node. Seeing the surgeon tomorrow to find out the plan of action. Just sending you a supportive hug xx
Mri tomorrow feeling nervous and awaiting the results is going to be alot !!!