How can I get in the best shape for treatment

Diagnosed with breast cancer Recently diagnosed with breast cancer
1

Hi,

I got my diagnosis on Friday after what felt like a very very long wait. 

I don’t have my staging yet. I know it’s No Special Type, Grade 3 and triple negative. I’m 35.

I know I’ll need chemo, surgery and radiotherapy. I’ve not had all my scans yet, they’ll be in the next couple of weeks.

I feel like I’m in a very strange bubble. Maybe shock. I dunno. Either way, I need to get prepared. Can anyone signpost to what I should be doing to prepare for treatment, how can I put myself in the best possible shape mentally and physically.

I run, I don’t drink (although I’m tempted to start). I am overweight but fit and well (I guess aside from this).

Any helpful tips and advice gratefully received. I don’t know what I am supposed to do between now and then?!?.

Thanks x

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Dear Ladu,

firstly can I say how sorry I am to hear of your recent diagnosis.  You WILL get through this. Also, whilst it is probably not a group you would have chosen to belong to, welcome to the forum.  Everyone on here is lovely. 

I was diagnosed in Aug, and had surgery in September, followed by radiotherapy.  With regards to preparation - I am going to write what worked for me, but take/leave as you find useful:

Firstly, Shore up your support - talk to everyone/anyone as you need to. By doing that, you can guauge who is likely to be able to be there for you, either psychologically/physically.  Some people were supportive at different stages.  You can also use different helplines, eg this one, your own specialist breast care team, Macmillan, plus lots of others (lots of info in your bumpf?). 

Physically - you say you are fit - that is good.  And you are also young.  Both those things stand you in good stead for recovery.  Try and stay fit, and whilst it is tempting to loll around comfort eating, (especially as we near the Christmas festivities), try and eat as healthily as you can and get some daily gentle exercise.  A walk round the block is good not only physically but mentally too.  I found running helped me destress, and it was the one thing I still had control over at the time.  I think I did the most mileage I had ever done, the week before my surgery!

A conversation with your Breast Care nurse might be helpful about what sort of bra you will need post surgery - depending on what you will be having done. 

I found journalling quite useful, particularly when I needed to rant.  I also found writing lots of lists helped me stay organised - things like food to make for the freezer,  what jobs I needed to do before treatment, etc. 

Don’t underestimate the psychological impact that a breast cancer diagnosis can have - so do try and plan some nice activities, or things that you find pleasurable/calming.  For me, it was crafting,  and mindful colouring. 

You didn’t mention it, but do you have family with you/nearby?  Try and talk things through with them if you can. 

It is early days, and you will find yourself attending lots of appointments/clinics which can be exhausting, so if you are still working, do take time to rest.  Might be worth explaining to your employer what is going on.   Take a notebook and pen, and write down questions you may have. for each hospital visit. 

Anyway,  that is probably enough to be going on with for now.  Do come back to us with any updates, or further questions.  Whilst everyone’s journey is different,  we are all here to support you. 

Take care and big hugs x 

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Hi Ladu

That’s some excellent advice from Pandabear. May I add another couple of points?

You mentioned you were slightly overweight. Great, keep it. I was slightly underweight. By the end of chemo, because I didn’t react well, I was frighteningly underweight and the chemo has taken its toll as a result. I wish so much I hadn’t been slim/thin to start with. Just stay fit as you can. I think with a 3yo, you don;t have much choice, do you?

Second, emotional health. You’ve discovered what a blow the diagnosis is but shared this with selected people. That’s great. This is nothing to feel ashamed or embarrassed about (women in the last century could be very secretive, my own mum included). In fact, you need to create a strong support network because you don’t know how you are going to feel. Some people just move through it, with off days; others can felled by it (me included) and you’ll need help with transport to appointments, someone to hold your hand, someone to look after you if you have vile days. Your partner will need support too - cancer tends to hit many targets! On that point, you are going to need all your resources for yourself now (and whatever is left is for your child). You are not responsible for your partner’s emotions. You haven’t ‘caused’ this to happen and you mustn’t feel bad if or when he is in distress. A lot of us fall down on that one. There are sources of support for partners and it’s his responsibility to sort that out, not yours. If you are fortunate, he will be a tower of strength and a domestic god all in one.

Be ready for interesting reactions. You can choose who you tell and how, but you can’t know how they’ll react. Friends and family can be very hurtful because they immediately want to make things right for you - and for themselves. They will come up with success stories to try to make it all sound better when they can’t. Others will just listen and give you space to rant, weep or just reveal bitterly. They are the ones who will be first in the queue with practical help. The important thing is not to have expectations - people are as they are. I have a friend who was always eager to help but required three weeks notice. She wasn’t the one I called when I needed to get to hospital within 60 minutes because I had a raging temperature!

Spend time every day doing things to support your emotional wellbeing but be ready for sleeplessness, tears, tantrums, despair, anger… and if you’re lucky, acceptance. We do all get through it. I relied on YouTube videos (my favourite is Progressive Hypnosis’s Manifest Healing, guaranteed to send me off with the fairies). Others rely on apps like Calm and Headspace, mindfulness, meditation - whatever works for you. Learn to to control your breathing too.

Don’t worry about your stage. I was treated at a Regional Centre for Excellence and they only use grades. I assume this must be best practice, considering their position, so maybe your hospital no longer feels they are useful? In any case, what difference does it make? You now have to trust your team to interpret the data and provide you with the most appropriate forms of treatment. You do have to take everything on trust from now on, unfortunately.

I wish you all the best in what lies ahead. It’s not easy but it’s all manageable - and you will manage too. 

Jan xx