Hi all,
Im new on here so please dont take offence to any mistakes i make.
My aunty has just found out her BC has returned after 5 years. After 2 weeks in hospital we was called to see the doctor who told us the cancer had spread to her lungs and thats why she was so poorly with fluid around the heart and lungs and that all tests was clear but there was no other medcical explination for what was going on. That was 3 weeks ago, since then she got alot better but went back into hospital last week with back pain, we was called up again on Monday and told that they had now found 2 mases on her spine and that the cancer had spread to her bones but is clear on her lungs. It has all been confusing for us as you can imagine being sat down by doctors who say first i cant go into detail cause its not my field but the cancer is back first time round they got it wrong but she saw her consultant today who has confirmed it from the MRI she had and she stats chemo and radio Friday both at the same time. She has also been told that thay cant cure it now and can only treat to control pain and the spread. They havent told us anything else which is really frushstrating apart from it was always going to come back as it was grade 3 and in 7 lynthnodes first time round but they didnt say that 5 years ago.
Thats the history out the way. Now i am faced with trying to be positive for her which im struggleing to do cause i cant tell her its going to be alright and she had it tough first time round with the chemo and this time its going to be alot more intense as she has got to have it weekly for 6 months. Has anyone had anything similar or any advise they can offer…
Hi Smiler09, I am sorry that you are having a hard time just now but pleased that yoou have come on this site to seek some support. I do not know how old your Aunt and you are, but I am a Mum with 2 grown up daughters and have had bone mets for over 10 years now. Yes there is no cure…but there are lots of treatments out there to help us keep going with secondaries. I first had BC in 1989 but after a reasonably good span of 10 years, I got the news I didn’t want…that the cancer had now spread to my sternum, spine, pelvis and ribs. I was in a lot of pain back then but I now take morphine every day and other painkillers too, and a drug which strengthens my bones and all help to make life more comfortable. You could ask for a meeting with her doctor to discuss your Aunts prognosis without having her there, ot if there is a Breast Care Nurse at the hospital your Aunt attends she may be able to set up a meeting.
I have recently finished an 8 month course of chemo and I am feeling a lot better again. You must have lots of unanswered questions running around your head just now. Of course each person is different and your Aunt may not be in the same place as I am regarding her prognosis, but I just wanted to let you know that there are people around who have lived longer than they thought they would with secondaries. You don’t have to be cheerful for your her all the time. Just be around and give her as much care and support as you can while she undergoes her chemo. Get back to us here if YOU need to talk/ask questins/scream/shout whatever. Best wishes from Val
Thanks Val youve helped loads, I think were going to take a day at a time, get her session out the way 2mora and get through Christmas. Weve got an appointmant 06/01 with her consultant and before that were all going to sit down and make a list of all the things we want to know and ask so hopefully we will have a better undersatnding then. I think at the moment she and all the family are just so shocked at the words there is no cure and we need to try and except that and move on with the hope of making her as comfortable as possible and help her to make the most of each day or years what ever the future may hold.
Thank you again and i agree this site is really good just reading through other peoples comments and seeing half the stuff your thinking other people have thought the same and also hearing from other people that have been affected by BC directly or as a relative. I think i will be on here lots over the coming months