I am in a really surreal place.........

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Hi there,

I did say that didn’t I Kaj :o) I’d forgotten :o) I will have to set myself some other goals now…My parents 50th anniversary is on the 17th March ( its mine and XOH too on the same date 22years)Maybe its a bit optimistic, I’ll have to think of some more, just to keep my momentum going…

Having cold feet about sledging as I’m not sure I will get down the path, have to get it cleared a little, perhaps. Glad i washed my longjohns, think I may need them tomorrow :o)

Early night beckons…hope we all have fun in the snow tomorrow. To me its just a tonic looking at it, I luv the snow and its beauty, sparkling so bright. one day when we were on the slopes, just preparing to go sledging we saw a heard of dear running and jumping in the snow, it was a lovely sight, everywhere was so silent and we just all watched in wonder at them till they disapeared down the valley.

Sleep well everyone :o)

Clare xxx

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Hi Clare

What a wonderful image of the deer and the snow :slight_smile: I looked out tonight at midnight and it was so light and beautiful. My son couldn’t resist running around throwing snowballs at the house!
I think it’s great that you’ve got some new goals and that you enjoyed your son’s birthday :slight_smile:
I’ll keep my fingers crossed for some more snow for you to enjoy,
Hugs and prayers
Chris xx

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Super new photo Clare… good to see that beaming smile.

Stay warm and safe today… I envy your snow (none at all in Glasgow, not a flake) but it is cold and slippery.

Good to see some new milestones on your ‘tick list’… and hope between this and then plenty more wonderful ‘ordinariness’

Take care

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Yes, a lovely photo :slight_smile: Be careful out there in the snow, dont slip over as we don’t want a knicker incident :wink: We have a very slight covering which I expect will have gone in an hour or two, plus very dull start to the day, no sun, just cloud.
As to your goals 17th March is/was one of mine that I set myself when I got my secondary dx nearly 4 years ago as its my 50th birthday :slight_smile: More importantly it means I would have got to my ‘goal before that’ - my YD’s 21st - which is 5 days before mine. Hoping you are around for the date as it must be a very important one for your parents as well as you.
Take care
Nicky xx

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Dear Clare,

I love your new picture. You are a beautiful person, on the outside and on the inside!

Sadie Xx Xx

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Love the photo Clare. I must learn how to put a photo of myself on here instead of my lovely foxglove, but don’t want to scare you all!
I am having my overdue blood transfusion tomorrow. To be there at 9 to take bloods for cross matching and each unit takes two hours. But if it makes me feel better it will be all worth it.
I then have another early start at a different hosp here in the city to have more xrays done on my hip and thigh and to see the orthpaedic team for a normal check up.
Still not starting date for chemo but will ask in my ward tomorrow. Think it may be next week, but not been told yet.
My husband and his brother are away out walking today , no snow here we had beautiful sunshine this afternoon. I decided to surprise them and make Sunday dinner. So roast pork, roast potatoes,brussel sprouts and green beans plus some apple sauce I made too. I did plan a dessert but REALLY knackered so having the easy version of ice cream, fresh raspberries and I found some meringue shells I made last week so will to them with that.
I didn’t realise just how much effort it has taken to do this. Had to keep stopping inbetween. I am so shattered I don’t think I will be able to eat anything. May just have a lie down. Shame because the table looks so nice with the candles and unused christmas crackers!!
Love to all on here. Lovely to see your goalposts extending and hope it continues to do so Clare, much love Val

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Hi all :o)

I didn’t manage the great expedition today…:o(
I tried to venture out, I got my lift in the 4x4 but found that almost impossible to get into. I had an inckling that I really didn’t have the energy but after all the effort to get there I thought I would have a go at getting up the hill, however much pushing and pulling, my legs just weren’t up to it…even fortified with a little blackcurrant vodka it wasn’t to be. I watched a while but got really cold, my feet felt like they had fallen off. So struggled up back in the 4x4 and home to a nice warm fire, feeling somewhat deflated but at least I tried.

Spent the rest of the day watching Notting Hill and did some ironing, I know how to live it up :o)

Settling down to Spag bol (cooked by my daughter) and a night by the fire, I hope there’s something good on tonight or is that just plain silly…

Have a lovely evening, one and all

Clare xxx

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A little bit of a shame, but on the positive side you had the oomph to give it a go, and at least didn’t end up falling over in a very undignified manner and break something that shouldn’t be broken.

I approve of the fire, food cooked by someone else and a girlie film (and the blackcurrant vodka earlier, but I won’t mention that bit), but what’s the fascination with ironing? I know I have one in the house somewhere, but I can’t remember the last time I saw it…

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Hi Clare,

A fab photo of a fantastic and inspirational lady.

You are a stronger woman than I, Clare, I wouldn’t have attempted going on a slope today to sledge, so 10/10 for trying, God loves a trier I was told as a child. I so admire you as nothing at all seems to faze you, feel proud of yourself missus.

My tubs of pansies have taken a snow battering, I’ve brushed the snow off and the pansies did look a little sorry for themselves, but within an hour their faces were smiling again.

You all sound to have had a lovely lunch and enjoyable family get together for Jamie’s birthday, it will be a cherished memory for all. Did you tuck into the chocolate cake today?

We had friends round for supper last night, my husband was chief cook and bottle washer and we had a fun evening. I had a few glasses of wine, more than I’ve had anytime since start of treatment, but oh boy did I enjoy it! Felt a little delicate this morning but very soon came round.

Enjoy your night by the fire and spag bol, do you watch ‘The Hotel’ on channel 4? It’s hilarious, and for me a not to be missed prog.

I hope you have a restful night clare.

Love and hugs.

Libby xxx

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Sending you warm comforting hugs this chilly day.
Do hope you’re ok after yesterday’s exertions.
If you’re not you just hold steady and relax into the day.
We just want you to know we’re thinking of you…
Don’t try and post until you’re fully able.
Please don’t feel any obligation here.

Holding hands tightly.
Wx

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Hi Clare

You’re quite the adventurer and I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be so bold!

I didn’t go out at all yesterday - just sat by the fire reading the papers after I cleaned up after my daughters 12th birthday party. Hope your son enjoyed his birthday and so glad you got to that milestone you had set yourself.

Hope you’re having a rather more restful day!

Laurie x

PS: Love the photo!

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Hi all,
Needless to say…I am knackered lol
I slept like a baby last night though, all that fresh air :o)

I wasn’t surprised that I didn’t make the hill, I have no energy these days, my legs are fine to walk with but getting to stand up is increasingly difficult. Lots of cushions under the chair now for uplift…got my loo seat and I can get off the bed ok. Its getting me down, if the truth be told, I still look like the moonchild with my steroid face and look like I am 8mth pregnant.

Jon is coming over tomorrow, not sure I want him to see me this way but I guess we are beyond that and hopefully will just except the progression. The fact he keeps popping in is lovely, it certainly isn’t my body he’s after lol…

I’ve had a nothing day really, just pottering…no ironing today CM :o) I have to do it, it bugs me if everything is not ironed. I do try and do it out of the tumble, then its easier to do. My daughter still needs her shirts ironed, although why I iron her pe kit I don’t know as I saw her stuffing it in the bag like it was a rag…ho hum…

I am finally cooking the partridges tonight, son is coming home lol finally…not seen him since his birthday. They are stuffed with mushrooms, juniper berries, bacon and there liver and kidneys. It was one of the nicest thing I have cooked before , so anticipating a yummy dinner tonight :o)

Well off to check on dinner :o)Hope you all enjoy yours too.

Clare xxx

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Your partridge sound really lovely Clare. I’ve never cooked partridge but I use pheasant every now and then. If I buy it from our village butcher it often has some shotgun pellets in it. Hmmm, not sure that’s entirely healthy to eat!

Left over roast beef and yorkshires for us tonight with the left over roasties and sprouts made into bubble & squeak. Yum! there’s even some gravy as well, made in the roasting tray…

Jon sounds like a real good 'un. He’s obviously seeing the real you inside and doesn’t care a jot what you look like.

So glad your son is coming home - he must have known you were cooking the partridge! Sometimes I think they only love us for our cooking… I know my daughter’s house mates love her coming home because she always goes back with some home baking.

I’m just waiting for a call from her to tell me which day she’s coming home from uni next week. We’re going to see Romeo and Juliet at the Broadway Theatre in Catford when she’s back as a friend of ours from the village is playing Juliet and has had rave reviews. Her stage name is Rachel Winters, so when she’s a megastar you heard it here first!

Look after yourself Clare and don’t go anywhere without a cushion or two strapped to your bum!

Jane xxx

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Hi Claire :slight_smile:

Well done for giving it a go! You’re braver than me.
Jon sounds lovely and I’m sure he sees you for the lovely lady you are.
That dinner sounds delicious. My mouth’s watering just thinking about it! Have a lovely night :slight_smile:

Hugs and prayers Chris xx

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Hello Clare,
I think you were great to even think about it. I was out for a bit with my children and it was freezing.

Your dinner sounds so yummy I’d love to come.

Hope you get another good nights sleep.

lots of love
Fran
xx

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Clare, your partridge recipe sounds delicious, I love game but don’t get many chances to eat it as my husband doesn’t like any birds (well, not feathered ones!) I often order it when out for lunch in the Yorkshire Dales. I had cheese omelette this evening - not as exciting as partridge - my hubby and dau were having tuna steak but it’s not a favourite of mine, call me a philistine but I prefer tinned tuna to fresh!

Enjoy your day tomorrow with Jon, he obviously loves your company and I’m sure you make each other feel good.

I too have had a nothing day, I should have tackled my mountain of ironing but did not feel up to it. I spoke to my BCN about my swollen and painful legs, ankles and feet, she advised me to lay on the sofa with legs raised and take a walk around every hour, and to wear pressure stockings in the day but not in bed, I followed her advice (which was same as yours) and my legs etc don’t ache as much. I attempted to read a book but lacked concentration, it was two pages forward and one back. I flicked through magazines and watched daytime telly. I did do some family history research for someone I’d promised to help, so achieved something. Oh and I changed our bed, or rather attempted to - I had to call for my husband’s help with the quilt cover which I was having a fight with.

I hope you sleep as well tonight as you did last night, don’t want to see you in the company of the ‘Up all Nighters’!

Catch up with you later,

Much love.

Libby xxx

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Clare you have reminded me there is a partridge in the freezer that I was given a few weeks ago. What a good recipe. I will try it. The Juniper will remind me of the gin I will be imbibing in!!!
Last night I put out the cottage pie meat I had made for our Barn dance next week I i thought it could cool in the snow ready for freezing. Silly me when we got back from a lovely dinner with the other organisers…you’ve guessed I’d overturned saucepans and forty portions devoured by a dog or fox…d…m back to sweating over a hot cooker.
I am in such a twitch at the moment re having a break following the rotten past months. My husband has reserved a cabin on the Hebridean Orincess in March . I don’t feel confident enough re possible problems to risk the booking without cancellation insurance. I keep looking at myself seeing jaundice, pain etc…it is pathetic of me but it would be so much to lose. This change in life is so odd. Nothing can be planned long term. We have seven days to decide!!!
Anyway I don’t want to burden you with my stupidity. A good walk and heart to heart with a radiologist friend might give me more insite. She may do me a scan if she sees what a prat I am being.
The garden here is wet snow and the mud of about sixty mole hills. Not as pretty as yesterday.
Sleep well Clare and don’t join the night owls
Lots of love
Cackles

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Hi there,

I have just written a post and it got lost on the way…grrrrrrrrr

I had a good day today, not as exhausted as I was last night, my XOH had to help me to bed as I had no energy whatsoever to do much.

I slept well though, which was good, I haven’t had a sleepless night for a week now, which is lovely (sorry to gloat)

Do try the recipe cackles, its lovely. I did enjoy it and the kids did too. I did cook some braised pork to go with it as we only had half each ( a taster ) as everyone wanted some :o)

Just pottered today, apart from Jon coming round, which was nice as I haven’t seen him in a while. We caught up on lots of things and were just comfortable with each other, he didn’t say how awful I looked lol, such a gent :o)

I am tired tonight, just the energy keeping the fire lit today, I expect as I have been freezing all day.

Aisling stayed off school, she’s got a nasty cold, am hoping she keeps it to herself as I have just started back on the chemo.

Cackles, its hard to realise that you can’t plan ahead, proably the hardest thing I have had to do, frustrating too. Wouldn’t you have a more relaxing time, if you went away. I know you have the worries of pain etc but a bit of sun and pampering may do you the word of good, lovely of OH to plan it, but it also puts you in an awkward position. Hope you can decide in 7 days :o)

I’m off to beddy bys, keep safe all, sleep well

Clare xxx

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Hi Claire :slight_smile:

Glad you’ve had another good sleep and both Jon and your XOH are being so helpful.
I hope your daughter gets better soon and keeps the bugs away from you!
Sleep well too
Hugs and prayers Chris xx

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Pleased to hear you are sleeping well, Clare. I’ve had a few sleepless nights this week but manage to cat nap during the day, so that’s OK.

It is annoying when your post goes into cyber space, it’s happened to me a few times, I now write my long messages offline then copy and paste.

It sounds like your partridge was enjoyed by all, makes the effort so worthwhile. Your recipe does sound scrumptious.

The weather has been freezing here today, my feet and hands have not warmed up all day. While out shopping I had intended buying a hot water bottle but forgot (chemo brain!). Must get one tomorrow.

Hope you are in dreamland, and waken feeling relaxed.

Much love,

Libby x