My app at hospital is Tuesday and I’m finding each day like the hardest thing to even get up and do anything. I know the chances are that I have a fibroadema again, but I cannot stop the anxiety setting in. I’ve read awful things on the internet. My breast was scanned 1 year and 9 months ago, they didn’t see anything apart from the lump they removed, I keep thinking how fast does a cancer lump grow? My mind is going crazy and it’s not fair on my husband or kids but I honestly don’t know how I’m going to make it to Tuesday? I think because I’ve been through this before and there was talk of cancer from the person who scanned me it has been so anxious about going back. I’m sorry to go on I just need someone to talk to 
Suzie
And my breath my dear. With everything you went through last time and tiven your anxiety issues it is difficult and not surprising you are feeling the way you are.
Please dont google as that is only adding to your anxieties.
That is one of the brilliant things about this forum, you can come on here and say exactly how you are feeling without upsetting or worrying those around you as the ladies on here totally understand exactly what you are going through.
It will not be long before Tuesday, just keep coming on here and we will help you through the next few days
Sending you hugs
Helena xx
Thank you. I’m just going to keep telling myself I had a full ultra sound of my breast 1.5 years ago, nothing untoward was found apart from
This fibroadema I had removed, and if anything else was starting this would have shown up on the scan. It does feel like another fibroadema and it has come from nowhere like the last one I had
Suzie, come on an chat anytime when it’s all getting too much , there will be someone around to listen, we know how hard this is and I can really relate to the not wanting to get out of bed scenario, I would physically shake with anxiety and under the duvet was the safest place to me but it did me no good and my husband would make me get up and out of the door!
You know this is likely to be another Fibrodenema and yes the fact that nothing else showed less than two years ago is a good sign so hang on to that thought, most breast cancers are slow growers and can have been there years before we feel a lump , just do this an hour at a time and the days will pass but try and keep your mind and body as occupied as possible.
No amount of stressing will change the outcome, this is a lesson I’ve learned over the past few years and it just makes a miserable time worse than it needs to be.
Take some deep breaths and get out the door with your little ones when it’s over whelming you, life has to go on Xx Jo
Thank you for calming me down…I managed to get out today but when I come back indoors I cry. Yes I read that about slow growing which is why I’m thinking that something would have shown on the scan. Roll on Tuesday, I am going to make sure they scan and biopsy me
I know I’m going over the top and being ridiculous as this happened last time. I am very anxious about returning to the clinic. My husband shouts at me because he doesn’t understand it’s just a vicious circle. My dad died of lung cancer 4 weeks from diagnosis 9 months ago and I’ve found this hard too as I’m only 34. I keep reading awful things on google and I’ve now convinced myself I had stage 4 breast cancer it’s just ridiculous
Oh Suzie, sorry to hear about your dad & of course, you are still grieving for him as well.
As Jo & Helena have said, really, do step away from google, it’s only making you feel worse for no good reason & won’t find the answer there. If you feel you need to google, if nothing else for distraction, then do it for things you like & enjoy.
It’s good you recognise where you’re coming from & as Jo says, we do understand.
ann x
I know I have to stay off google. I keep feeling the lump and now thinking I can feel more. You ladies are so strong x
I woke up with that feeling of dread again this morning that it’s another day of extreme anxiety and depression. I’ve stayed off of google today and forced myself outside in the garden and I’ve planted 16 roses. Now I’ve done that I’m running a bath and anxiety is starting to set in about the fear of the unknown. So upset I’m back in this waiting situation again less than 2 years on
Morning are the worst, just keep doing what your doing, that’s another day well underway and look what you have achieved! XX
Mornings and evenings are definitely the worst! At least I’ll have a pretty rose garden whatever happens
Hospital just called, they have a cancellation on Monday so I’m going then now. Can I insist on a biopsy to be done at this appointment? I had one last time because they were concerned by the lump on the ultrasound just wondered if they say nothing concerning can I ask for biopsy?
Ok thank you, I’m so scared I’m having a bad day I’ve convinced myself this is cancer. I can’t understand why I would have another lump this soon otherwise?
I know I’m a nitemare…I’m aware if this. I can’t help but think the worst as my anxiety takes over and consumes me
I totally understand how your feeling but you have to try not to let it rule you , do you get any help for your anxiety in general? Xx
Yes I am on tablets for it since the last time I had this scare. When I have a breast lump tho my anxiety goes sky high, like ridiculous and tablets do nothing apart from diazepam which tend to make me sleep. I’ve had counselling. I have always been a worrier but since my second child in 2012 my anxiety has hit a whole new level, I always look at the worst possible outcomes and I know what I’m doing is ridiculous but when I’m in this state it’s so difficult to get out of it, I think the fact my dad died 3 weeks after diagnosis when he wasn’t even poorly or had signs has scared the living daylights out of me too xx
My Dad had primary lung cancer which had spread to his bones and liver. He was diagnosed and died 3 weeks later and the only symptom he had was 2 weeks prior to diagnosis he was short of breath. He went to the GP, they said he had a chest infection and sent him on his way. This is why I have worry over GPs. I have a close friend who I talk to who is brilliant, my husband or family don’t understand as they don’t understand anxiety x
I just have to try and think positive and hope that what I can feel is another fibroadema. I can feel one the size of my last lump and another close the size of a pea. I am trying to think that it’s another one of them, apparently they are common after you have had one. X
Yes fingers crossed, it does feel the same but then I don’t know what a cancer lump feels like, it’s prob the same.
I hope so, I guess I will have to wait till Monday then probably another week or so after that for biopsy results. I will be sure to update everyone on here x