In a pickle!

Public Archive
1

Hi Guys,

Well where do I start? I have hads WLE, Chemo, Rads and luckily do not need any herceptin or tamoxifen etc… so all good on that part.
On the road to getting back to ‘normal’… but I feel so unhappy with things, sorry to go on… I keep arguing with my partner, he works from home and as I have nit returned to employment yet i am at home alot of the time too… supposed to be taking it easy. My partner runs a business from home with the help of his close family… they argue a lot and this makes an awful atmosphere sometimes, when i can see it is over such petty things. especially after having BC i have realised that taking small steps and slowing down are important for your overall health. I try not to let is get to me but sometimes it does. i have tried to talk to my partner but he tells me to not get involved! well it’s pretty hard to avoid.
I do have the option to go and stay with my mother, but to do that will mean a different lifestyle and although I am moaning I want to stay with my partner.
i am looking to return to work in the new year.
I just feel unhappy a alot of the time. is it me? Is it my relationship? is it the time of year? Now I just feel like I am whinging… but I know I should not feel stressed all the time and upset. I almost want to shock them by leaving one day and see how they get on without me around. Sometimes I feel taken for granted and badly treated. I just want to feel at home somewhere, were i can relax and make plans for my future. I feel in a pickle. I am sure it sounds simple to some people and some would say, ‘pull your socks up’ and get on with it. i have and am trying to do but I have been unhappy for a while now. when will i get back to normal?? everything seems so scary in the big wide world. i feel lost!

2

the time after treatment ends can be the most testing, without support and a framework of hospital visits etc. It is at this stage that you have time to reflect on the time spent in the hands of the medics and to speculate on the uncertainty ahead. I’d copy Dr Peter Harvey’s article After the Treatment Finishes - Then What?
He is Consultant Clinical Psychologist at Leeds Teaching Hospitals Trust or he was when he wrote this article. Try putting this in google and it may come up. It deals with the roller coaster emotions you feel. I found getting back to work a great help but it can be hard if you don’t have a supportive employer. I did - I went back with slightly shorter hours and was able to work through radiotherapy (I had only 15 sessions and an office based job which I could cope with)

Good luck. The only thing about listening to bickering after breast cancer is you realise how trivial it all is in the greater scheme of things.

Mole

3

Hi Nadia

Breast Cancer Care can offer you further support to help you to manage the way you are feeling at the moment and to reiterate Mole’s advice, the period after treatment has ended can often be very difficult and many people contact us to say they are struggling around this time.

You are welcome to call our confidential helpline on 0808 800 6000 for support and a ‘listening ear’, the team can talk to you about our other support services which include ‘Peer support’ whereby you can be put in touch with someone of similar age and diagnosis to you. You can also find out more via the ‘Support for you’ tab at the top of this page.

Hope this heps.

Best wishes
Lucy